I know what's your name?
Hello, my name is Lee and for obvious reasons. I'm also known as The Lost Boys guy
Okay, and how long have you lost your voice I?
Just knew you were going to ask something that I hadn't thought about
beforehand
So please excuse the awkward silence while I type out my answer
I've been speechless for 37 years well. Tell me why you decide to enter the show the ship I
Think I entered Britain's Got Talent
for the same reason everyone does
to meet Ant & Dec this
Is all going so well up until that point the stage League is yours
Hello ladies and gentlemen as
You may be able to tell I'm a struggling stand-up comedian who also struggles to stand up
To be honest, I'm not sure how good I am?
I'll leave that for you to decide
But just so you know if you don't laugh, but the disabled guy you are going to hell
Well I realized I'd never be able to talk again, I was speechless I
Have lived in Newcastle all my life
Yes, but for some reason. I still hadn't picked up the accent I
Can see that some of you are trying to figure out where you know me from
Maybe it would help if I started saying phrases such as the next train to arrive
Home
And from my time at the post office please go to cashier number later I
Got the train here today I
always like to sit in those seats for disabled people I
was about halfway here when another disabled person got on and asked me to move I
Didn't realize I'd be playing disabled Top Trumps when I got on or I would address more special
Needless to say I didn't give up my seat
Who cares if he was both blind and deaf I?
Was there first?
It was very awkward
he couldn't see that I was still there and
I couldn't tell him I wasn't moving because I can't speak
Before I leave you, I have one more thing to say I
hate that we have so many
Politically correct words to describe disabled people now
It's all special needs
special schools
special olympics I
Don't know what is so special about me
That is why it always alarms me when I hear about special forces going to war
You've been a fantastic audience
Goodbye