C: Hey, is this like a skirt, or a hat, or a lampshade? O: Oh, that's a purse charm and it's...
90$. C:Oh...
C: I need this. O: Oh, you totally need it. C: Okay
Narration: Every Urban Outfitters Ever
C: Um, hi, do you work here?
O: Um, yes! C: Great. Uh, does this look good?
O:Totally cute. Other Guy: Yeah.
O: I mean, if you don't have the right body to wear cute clothes, then you probably shouldn't wear it.
OG: Yeah, you wouldn't look good in anything, so it doesn't really matter.
C: Oh.. oh my god (cries)
O: Sad does not look good with that dress. OG: Well, I said she'd look bad in anything, so...O: True.
Na 1: Yes, I'd like a job here. Na 2: Do you have tattoos? 1: No. 2: Get the hell out.
S; This place is so unique. I: One-of-a-kind.
S: Distinctive. I: Truly original. Both: Like this backpack. It's just so...me.
Na: Oh, how cute. Another coffee table book about how dogs poop.
S: Oh, man. These vintage t-shirts are so dope. N: Yeah, who is that? S: I think he's a rapper. N: Tight.
N: I love Drake. Na: Oooh, 90s TV reference. Nice.
N: Pardon me. Do you guys have a sales section?
O: Hmm, you know what? I'm not sure. OG: Yeah, let me ask me manager. One sec.
O: I mean, you still wouldn't be able to afford it. Bitch. OG: Poor people don't belong in this store. N: Both of you are horrible.
OG: Did he say our clothes are horrible, cuz that's so in. O: It's so chic.
Na 1: Is Urban Outfitters real hipster, or like fake hipster?
Na 2: It's rich hipster.
I: Hey, Noah? Do you think I'm boring? N: No way man. You always wear fun socks.
(Chime Music Plays)
I: Oh yeah, anything else?
N: No.
Na: Why are the front windows always broken?
I: Oh, nice vintage mugs. S: Vintage cameras! I: Ooo, vintage dad jacket! S: Vintage ironic t-shirt.
I: Dude, why are they always putting all the best clothes on the mannequins? Guy: Oh, I'm not a mannequin.
G: I'm just a real dad waiting for his daughter. I: Maybe I should take the jacket.
G: No. I'm not a freaking mannequin! *clothes ripping while he screams and cries* I'm just a dad!
C: Dad, can I have a $75 candle? Hello? You never listen to me.
Na: I wish they had a baby section for my kids.
O: A-Pol-a-roid. Huh.
C: What do you think?
O: Mm. It'd be perfect to wear one time to a music festival for an Instagram picture, and then never ever wear it again.
O: Because it is completely impractical. C: Or on a road trip. O: Or trip to the desert.
C: Or we can take an Instagram picture here in the store without even having to buy it.
O: Oh my god. So unique. C: Yeah, so unique. Let's get out here.
Na: Be honest, we've all stolen something from Urban Outfitters.
K: Hey, excuse me. Do you have these in a larger size?
O: We might. OG: Totally. O: Let me just go check in the back.
O: We only make clothes for skinny people. OG: I am offended you would even ask.
O: Let me just go to the back, and then go on my phone and look at food pictures on Instagram for 10 minutes.
O: And then come back with nothing.
Na: Every Urban Outfitters Ever
S: This place is so unique. I: Truly original. S: Distinctive. *Ian hits table* I: Ahh, f**k. *Shayne laughs*
I: Okay, that table is poking out more than that table. S: Bloopers!
*crying excessively*
*borderline scream/cries* I don't have pants! *cries some more* It's so much gargo in my pants! (CC note: I have absolutely no clue what gargo is)
*screaming over each other* O: Put them on the ground! Those pants are fat now! OG: That's what you did. O: Those were skinny pants, and now they're FAT!
Both: Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetttttttttttt Ouuuuuuuuuuuuuttttttttttttttt waaaaasssss a good movieeeeeeeee!
O: Look at this visor. OG: Yeah, because our parents have money.
O: I don't know who my parents are. OG: Are you poor? *laughs* Oh my god! Everyone, (unintelligible) is poor!
*still crying*
I: Wow, the Breaking Bad remake got weird.
Na: Well, hello there. Thank you guys so much for watching this video. If you're not yet subscribed, feel free to do that.
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YouTube in 2008 vs 2018. Yeah, holla. Yeah, holla for $1.