Despite their inner cravings for adventure, it’s fair to say that INFJs can be considered one of
the least spontaneous personality types within the MBTI. Not only does this mean
it’s difficult for them to absorb the present moment, but it also makes for a seriously
difficult time when they’re challenged with quick-thinking, care-free decision making.
Welcome or welcome back PSYCH-Os! Today we’re discussing exactly why INFJs can’t quite make
care-free decisions. But before we get into it, we’d love it if you liked and subscribe
to our channel, as well as to click the post notification bell so you never miss a video!
Number 1: They can’t help but to plan and organize It’s no surprise that the well-calculated INFJ
personality type needs some form of structure in their daily lives.
They don’t like surprises and they certainly don’t like when things don’t get as planned. In fact,
INFJs can’t bring themselves to make so-called care-free decisions because they can’t help
but to go into complete planning mode when they get ahold of new information. And so,
it’s admittedly impossible to not organize when they get the chance, making care-free decisions
an extremely rare occurrence when it’s entirely up to them. In reality, as much as an INFJ tries and
actually wants to just live life in the moment, they’re always thinking of how
it will fit with the rest of their plans - even going as far as scheduling in some time
for their version of letting-loose, aka finding a local cafe without first Googling the menu.
Number 2: They want to calculate future outcomes If an INFJ is forced into making a quick,
uncalculated decision that pertains to their lives or even how they spend their time, you can bet
it’ll ruin the enjoyment. For example, if an INFJ was coaxed into going out after work with friends
without the time for mental and energetic preparation, they’ll probably spend the whole time
thinking how and when they can escape to do the things they actually planned on doing that night.
On the flipside, if INFJs were able to really decide whether or not they wanted to go,
what to wear, what to eat, and what time they wanted to be home by,
they could actually relax and enjoy the moment rather than finding the nearest exit. This
decision making process is even worse when it comes to more significant life events such as a
breakup. If an INFJ were to follow their immediate instincts of their partner’s negative qualities
and pull-the-plug without thinking things through, they’d have a much harder time coping with
not only the emotions but also the ruminating of whether or not it’s actually what they wanted.
Number 3: They get a sense of instability in spontaneous decisions
But what happens when there is no plan in the first place?
Well.. depending on the situation, when INFJs don’t have an idea of what may happen,
they can get rather uncomfortable and even irritable at times. Besides the fact that
they’ll spend the entire time guessing, they’ll also be met with an underlying sense of insecurity
as they feel like their regular foundations of knowing what to expect aren’t there to ease
their mind. Since INFJs can get rather anxious, especially in highly stimulating environments,
not having the stability of running through potential scenarios can make
things even worse. Similar to our previous example of going out with friends on a whim,
they wouldn't feel as confident in themselves and their socializing abilities if they didn’t have
the time to prepare. And so, spontaneity ends up not being their strongest suit in the slightest.
Number 4: They want the best for every affected INFJs rarely think of themselves and themselves
alone. With the habit of calculated thinking and planning, they never fail to question how their
decisions will affect those around them or those involved. This happens mostly when other people
are directly affected such as in a workplace setting or family relationship, yet even if it’s
a personal decision, they’ll certainly ruminate over how certain people will feel. Whether they
are focused on other’s emotions, people’s personal success or overall mental well-being, INFJs
feel the need to take into account the rippling effect of the actions they take. They’ll weigh
up their pros and cons with the consideration of others included, and come to a conclusion of
the best action forward. Unfortunately, you can’t please everyone, and for that reason, INFJs tend
to have a lot of guilt should someone they value be upset about their personal decisions. Nevermind
care-free, INFJs have the opposite problem of being overly caring in their chosen way forward.
Number 5: They always fear not making the right decision
Whether it be what to choose off of the lunch menu or deciphering if they should or shouldn’t
change career paths, no matter how much planning goes into it, INFJs always have that little fear
in the back of their minds that maybe it’s not the right choice. Yes, being an introverted intuitive,
intuition plays a big roll in the decisions an INFJ makes, however, the logical side of
their brains can’t help but to ruminate about the possible results they’re missing out on.
In fact, this can be a huge source of stress for the INFJ type and can even temporarily debilitate
them from making any decision at all. This is where this introspective type can’t imagine how
freeing it must feel for other types that just go with the flow without feeling like they’re
standing on the edge of a cliff uncertain if there's a net to catch them when they jump.
So, to put it simply, FOMO makes care-free decisions seriously undesirable for this type.
Number 6: They want to please their past, present and future selves
This sounds a little more complex than it actually is in the eyes of an INFJ,
but for people that live in the moment, it’s not something they really think twice about.
INFJs not only want to make the best decision in the present, but they also don’t want to
set themselves up for failure in the future, or go against morals they formed in the past.
They want to make their younger selves happy in a metaphorical way,
and they obviously want to ensure their decisions will satisfy them for the following weeks,
months and years to come. They strongly believe in the fact that the habits,
routines and beliefs you have today, ultimately create the life you will live tomorrow.
And so, they are continuously checking in with themselves wondering ‘does this path or decision
fit within the narrative I’m trying to create?’ This also plays a huge role in taking their
short-comings in the past and applying that knowledge to the future, which brings us to..
Number 7: They attentive learn from past mistakes
Care-free decisions and spontaneity usually doesn’t factor in how previous care-free decisions
have worked out in the past. It’s like the whole point of just letting loose and going with the
flow is the excitement of the unknown without the fear that it may not work out as planned.
For the INFJ, it’s not happening. This analytical type can’t help but to use their past lessons
as a foundation for which way to go in the future. In fact, it’s not only their
own mistakes that they take into account but also other people’s mistakes that they’ve in the past.
For example, if they’ve personally seen someone get seriously injured by water skiing,
you can bet they’ll rather choose to just watch on the side lines,
never once thinking they’re missing out on the fun. Of course you can get injured in
really any sport or physical activity, but until the INFJ has witnessed it themselves,
leaving an imprint on their brain, they can be pressured into it.. No ifs, ands or buts.
Number 8: They struggle to step outside their comfort zone
Now, if INFJs are faced with a decision that shakes up the comfortable little life they’ve
created for themselves, all of the previously mentioned factors that go into their decision
making process often go rampant. When INFJs map out their lives, they may leave some room for
adventure, however for the most part they ensure that they’ll remain comfortable at all times. They
ensure they’ll have enough time to recharge their social batteries, a nearby escape should they need
it, and that they’re surrounded by people they can handle for unknown amounts of time. However,
the concept of stepping outside their comfort zones rarely include these factors and that
can make the decision-making process seriously challenging. The worst part is that sometimes an
INFJ’s intuition knows they need to flee the nest of comfortability and explore an unknown endeavor,
leaving them feeling torn between following their ego or what they deep down know is best for them.
Well PSYCH-Os, that’s it for today’s video. Let us know in the comments below if you can recall a
time where you made seemingly care-free decisions as an INFJ! Also, make sure to leave us a like,
share with your friends and also subscribe to our channel so that you never miss a video!