Singer Billie Eilish has filed
a restraining order against a 23 year old man.
- It tore me apart.
And I literally was bleeding on the bathroom floor.
LAPD are currently investigating
but no arrest has been made.
What are you afraid of?
I was in a relationship.
that was very emotionally abusive.
You can't really be in control
even if you try, which is terrifying.
He punched a wall.
I did not feel comfortable saying no in any sort of way.
He says, you can't get what you want
unless what you want is to die for me.
He just stood like five feet away from me,
and perfectly still, and he had the face mask
so all I could see were his eyes.
I was thinking about the way that I was gonna die.
Justin Bieber breaks down over Billie Eilish.
I just wanna protect her.
I don't wish that upon anybody.
Being that young and not knowing where to turn.
I really need help, I'm not okay.
And I have no one else to talk to.
When in your life
have you felt the most trapped?
For the past six months
this man has quote, harassed and threatened Billie
while parked at a school across from her family's house.
Billie alleges that he began leaving quote,
extremely disturbing and threatening letters.
You might very well die.
You will die.
Billie wrote, he recently made
a throat slitting gesture to me.
His constant presence causes her quote,
substantial anxiety, fear, and emotional stress.
I just wanna give you a good show and I can't.
It's just literally a nightmare.
I can't do this, I'm sorry.
Billie fought to hide her pain
and fear so she could make other people happy.
I wanna be screaming. And I can't
because I don't want them to have a bad moment.
The fans deserve everything that I'm getting.
And I would be nothing without them.
I genuinely didn't think I would like make it to 17.
All I want is to be the kind of person
that I would've wanted to look up to when I was younger.
I'm afraid I'll wake up
and I won't have any of this anymore.
Everything I've ever loved, I've had to quit.
I used to dance like 12 hours a week,
and then I got injured.
My hip, the bone separated from the muscle.
I just laid in bed, I couldn't move.
I luckily had music.
If I didn't have music, I don't...
Everything would be so bad.
To have a song that is describing exactly how you feel,
it makes you feel like you're not alone, you know?
When Billie felt alone
one person's music helped her get through it.
Who do you feel about
the way your fans feel about you?
See, here's the thing, Justin Bieber.
Literally was terrified that when I got a boyfriend,
when I was older, he won't compare.
And I'll just love Justin Bieber more.
I can remember sobbing into a pillow
because I thought,
I'm never gonna feel this way about anyone.
As Billie's music connected her
to millions of people, she thought she'd found someone
who could live up to Justin.
I've only dated one person.
[Q[ You're so fine.
I love you, I'm in love with you.
- [Q] I love you.
- I love you!
You're falling in love with someone
it can be scary because you're not in control.
Billie kept working herself to the bone
as her relationship with Q took a dark turn.
- We are drawn to dangerous situations
because we don't know what's on the other side.
Where are you right now?
Hungover?
You didn't drive home, right?
You said you wouldn't do that.
I'm mad that you did that.
I feel like you don't take me seriously.
I just want you safe.
He broke his hand 'cause he punched a wall.
I'm trying to get him to go to therapy.
He's so self destructive.
- [Father] I heard he broke his hand 'cause he was angry
and he punched the wall. - Yeah.
- Don't want him getting angry at you.
- Billie's body started collapsing
from all the pain and fear.
And her old injury came back when she tried to perform.
- It like tore me apart, it hurt so bad.
- Didn't realize that it was torn ligaments.
It was much more dire than we had thought.
- I was not happy with the way I was.
My body's always gonna be broken, even if I heal it.
I was the most depressed that I've ever been.
I felt like there was no point to anything at all.
I was literally locking myself in the bathroom
and making myself bleed
'cause I thought I deserved it.
I was in Berlin and I was alone in my hotel.
There was a window right there.
And I remember crying.
Are you seriously implying
that you'd jump off the roof?
Do you feel okay about a song like that?
- I feel like it's something I wanna have said.
People are always like, it's so dark, have happy music.
I'm like, but I'm never feeling happy.
So why would I write about things I don't know about.
I feel the dark things.
I feel them very strongly.
Billie needed her boyfriend's support
more than ever.
- Can you come here?
Can't you see me?
The night before he'd been really weird and distant.
I'm miserable, and I miss you,
and I wish you would talk to me,
and I have no one else to talk to.
But when he left her hanging
before the biggest show of her career,
someone unexpected stepped up instead.
It's a beautiful circle.
What was that like for you?
- It was insane.
I can't even tell you.
And I literally cried in his arms.
For like five minutes.
And every time I would do this, kind of like,
like he could feel it,
and he would just squeeze me tighter.
You know exactly how it feels
to be him in that situation.
I just wanna protect her, you know?
I don't want her to go through anything I went through.
If she ever needs me, I'm just a call away.
It's like tonight,
where I'm reminded what I mean to people.
Your love for me touched my heart.
You are so special.
Remember that.
Embrace it all, believe you are great.
Justin's words were the reminder Billie needed.
I've decided to start living like I just woke up.
If I was my 12 year old self and suddenly I woke up
and this was my life, how would I look at it?
And what would I be like, oh my god,
that right now I'm taking for granted.
As many people can try to help me and talk to me,
but it doesn't change anything.
The only person that can change
the way that I feel is me.
If there's one place where you think is the most negativity
don't even think about it, just like get rid of it.
And if it's people get rid of them.
She started by
ending things with her boyfriend.
Just like spent time away from him for a little bit.
And I was like, wow, I'm missing so much
because I am worried about you all the time.
I can't fix him.
I don't think you should be in a relationship
super excited about certain things
that the other person couldn't care less about.
You don't even have enough love to love yourself,
you can't love me.
And Billie finally began fighting for herself.
There are some creeps out there.
Singer Billie Eilish
has filed a restraining order against a 23 year old man.
Thankfully the restraining order was granted.
I was really mistreated.
And then I just realized I was better than that.
And since then, I just, I feel like
I've just grown to know my worth.
I didn't think I would make it to this age.
And I have, and I waited,
and I'm like happier than I've ever been in my life.
By fighting for what she deserved,
Billie became the person she always dreamed of being.
Self-worth is only determined by you.
You're the only person that controls it.
Everybody on the planet could not believe in you,
and if you believe in you, you're good.
Where'd you find the strength.
Where's that come from?
Seriously trusting your gut.
Whatever I felt like was right and was wrong,
that's just what I went with.
How did it feel?
Was it everything you could've imagined or what?
Yes, I can't believe it.
I'm proud of you.
- I love you. - Love you too.
- Nominated for six Grammys.
And I have my dream car.
I'm not in a relationship, thank the lords.
My relationship with my family is good.
I am pretty, somewhat.
I am famous.
You have your life and that's such a blessing.
Know yourself.
You can make your life what you want it to be.