Number 16: The Blobfish
You're unlikely to spot this flabtastic little beast in your oceanic adventures
because the Blobfish prefers to live where the waters are dark and chilly. Even though some
people think this formless fish is the ugliest animal on the planet, we beg to differ. It's cute
and cheeky in its own way and almost certainly could qualify as a real-life monster. With a
squishy body and a perpetually frowning face, this fish looks like what would happen if you
left Uncle Fester in the bathtub for too long. The Blobfish doesn't interact with humans very often,
but all of their encounters have been positive- which is more than we can say for our next pick...
Number 15: Mola Mola The Mola Mola's other name is Ocean Sunfish,
but this bony beast is anything but sunny! It's a meaty monster that clocks in at two thousand
two hundred pounds and is one of the heaviest creatures you are likely to find lurking in
the seven seas. These scary swimmers aren't human aggressive specifically, but they are
extremely curious and can barge in out of nowhere to scare the living hell out of unlucky swimmers.
Number 14: Barreleye Fish
The Barreleye Fish kinda looks like a sad, miniature Beluga with one very jaw-dropping twist:
their entire heads are translucent. That's right; you can see the Barreleye Fish's brain
bopping away inside there, and also get a glimpse of their huge eyes swiveling around.
It's… unnerving… to say the least, but Barreleye Fish aren't dangerous to people-
at least we don't think that they are. These shuddersome swimmers are deep-water dwellers,
so unless you're taking a little dip down into the Mariana Trench- you're unlikely to encounter one.
Number 13: Fangtooth
The fearsome Fangtooth also goes by the name "Ogrefish," and it's totally well-deserved.
This toothy terror has a gnarly row of jacked-up teeth that are way disproportionate to its body,
unseating the Blobfish as the weirdest-looking deepsea dweller ever to rise up out of the depths.
We don't know if Fangtooth is human-adverse or friendly because it lives so far beneath the
waves, but if looks could kill, this hideous creature would be a stone-cold assassin!
Number 12: Red Lipped Batfish Pucker up, buttercup! The Red Lipped Batfish is
one of the most astounding animals ever to grace the ocean floor. These odd creatures use the tips
of their wings to navigate the seafloor, and their faces are entirely made up with- you guessed it-
bright red lips. Although the Red Lipped Batfish looks like it always wants to “see the manager”,
it's got some resourceful qualities as well, like it's ability to reel in smaller prey using its
snout. You can find this bathing beauty skittering around in the Galapagos Islands of Ecuador.
Number 11: Isopod Isopods are the fearsome oceanic bugs just
waiting to slither into your deepest, darkest REM sleep. They are enormous, squicky, multi-legged
bugs that not only look disgusting- but they pack a hell of a sting if you pick them up.
Thanks to deep-sea giganticism, the Isopods that you're likely to come across on the seafloor
can grow to a whopping sixteen inches long, making them the king of creepy-crawlies.
Fortunately, humans are unlikely to ever come in contact with these bizarre beasts.
Number 10: Kiwa This cuddly crustacean is occasionally referred
to as the "Yeti Crab" for its flowing furry claws. Surprisingly, the Kiwa's coat is a feature,
not a bug, and the bacteria collected on its claws are used to detoxify food at deep lengths. The
Kiwa is a lean, mean, eating machine hanging out roughly five thousand feet below the waves off of
Easter Island's coast. A hydrothermal vent keeps the Kiwa happy, warm, and well fed. It also has a
mystical connection- further cementing its monster status. In mythology, Kiwa is a the name of a
benevolent sea guardian, and these fuzzy wonders are more scientific miracle than fearsome beast.
Number 9: Viperfish Meet the Viperfish,
a sadistic swimmer equipped with some of the seven seas' best evolutionary hunting skills.
It's extraordinarily dangerous, rising up from the inky depths at night to lure prey with its
phosphorescent glow. That's right; the Viperfish produces its own light, drawing creatures
into the ethereal glow of its orbit before smashing them to smithereens on needle-sharp,
massive teeth. The Viperfish's teeth are too huge to be contained in its skull, so they jut out
horribly around its face. Once you've been sucked in by the glowing beauty of this apex monster,
watch out! The Viperfish stretches its massive maw and impales prey quickly on its deadly teeth.
It's neither a swift… nor painless… death...
Number 8: Vampire Squid Although the Vampire Squid
might look like it's been ripped right out of the pages of a Bram Stoker novel, this creature
doesn't even drink blood. Its sole vampiric quality is a fashion accessory in the form of
webbed skin that connects all of its tentacles, swirling behind like a spooky underwater cape.
Since these little non-bloodsuckers are elusive, they were only recently discovered and given
the name Vampyroteuthis Infernalis- or Vampire Squid of Hell. Clearly, this was one colossal
over-reaction and one that earned the gentle Vampire Squid a high place on this list.
Number 7: Goblin Shark
The Goblin Shark is a grisly reminder of the past; one scientists refer to as a "living fossil."
Its face is dominated by an exposed, bony maw full of sharp teeth, but the most fearsome
aspect of the Goblin Shark- and that's a tall order- is its huge head protrusion.
Like a perverse unicorn, the Goblin Shark is crowned with a ghoulish horn that is used to
part the chilly waters of the world. Thankfully, these living monsters are few and far between.
There are only two recordings of Goblin Sharks ever seen in North America. Still, just the fact
that these creatures are out there is enough to bring a permanent chill to your bones...
Number 6: Northern Stargazer Although Northern Stargazer
might sound like a delicious new double IPA or a fall-themed candle scent, it's actually a watery
phantasm almost too nasty to comprehend. Its neutral coloration means that it can lie in wait
buried in the sand until it's far too late. By the time unsuspecting pretty realize what's going on,
the Northern Stargazer has sprung into action, electrifying its victim with pulsating shocks
and then scooping it up into its toothy, razor-sharp mouth. Scuba divers beware! You
can find this maritime monster lying in wait all over the seafloors of the Atlantic coast.
Number 5: Frilled Shark
This prehistoric pariah is a cousin of the Goblin Shark,
but it's got a higher place on the list because of its sheer fright factor. Half shark, half serpent,
all bone-chilling terror, the Frilled Shark is mercifully very rare, but unlike its ancient
relative the Goblin Shark, it does like to explore the surface. Frilled Sharks flirt with
warmer waters all the time and have been found as shallow as one hundred and sixty feet deep.
When you consider the fact that this animal can move seamlessly between deep and shallow waters,
you have a bit of an idea of what a menace it is! Frilled Sharks are ancient terrors,
clocking in at two and a half million years old, meaning that they were roaming
the seas when some of the big bads of the Paleolithic Era had reign of the waters.
Number 4: Anglerfish
It evolves to be exponentially more bizarre as it ages, earning it one of the spot tops on this list
and in our nightmares. Like many briny behemoths, the Anglerfish uses self-generated light to
attract its prey. Once they're within striking distance, it clamps down with massive rows of
spiny teeth, skewering their victims and feasting away with abandon. What separates the Anglerfish
from your run of the mill monster is that mature males lose their digestive system bit by bit
and have to physically attach themselves to female Anglerfish to stay alive.
Number 3: Jasconius Although this creature may or may not exist,
as told by Irish folklore- the legend of Jasconius lives on, and swims on, in the form of
massive Sperm Whales. According to legend, Irish cleric St. Brendan and his band of monks
attempted to cross the ocean- only to take refuge on an island for the night.
The island shuddered and moved, revealing itself to be Jasconius! Oceanic lore is littered with
creatures that might be Sperm Whales. These enormous Cetaceans stretch nearly seventy feet
long and can weigh up to 125,000 pounds, easily mistaken for small islands in the greater deep.
Number 2: Hydra
Greek lore is steeped in tales of the Hydra, a serpentine aquatic monster with an insatiable
taste for blood. Hydras are supernatural scaries- having one fearsome immortal head and many others
equally as adept at plucking sailors out of the ocean. Hercules had to kill a Hydra, and Odysseus
had to best a Hydra in Homer's epic tale The Odyssey. Interestingly, these mystical
monsters are based on one real-life creature- whose gentle nature and intelligence we are now
just starting to understand. Hydras are really Octopuses who, despite their gelatinous
and frankly- totally bizarre- appearance, are not very vicious at all. Sure, an Octopus' tentacles
can wreak havoc on your skin, and they have been known to attack scuba divers that get too close,
but Octopuses usually leave well enough alone. The same can't be said for our number one pick....
Number 1: Kraken The Almighty Kraken! Terror
of the seven seas. Literature and lore are simply stuffed with Kraken horror stories, specifically
giant squids yanking sailors to the bottom of the sea or smashing up boats like matchwood.
Aristotle first mentioned the Kraken in 350 B.C.E., and the fish story has just been getting
bigger and bigger ever since, but there's a kernel of truth to even the most fantastical tales.
Giant Squid are truly terrifying animals, stretching up to forty-six feet long and
jam-packed with sinewy muscles. They can suck down whales and are exceptionally dangerous to humans,
with deep-sea fatalities reported at the hands, or tentacles, of these lethal creatures.
Thanks for watching! Would you rather wake up with a Kraken in your bed,
or get stranded in the middle of the sea for 24 hours? Let us know in the comments section below.