Hello my name is Emmelda and today I will make life simple for all the guys who are watching
this video. How? Well, today I’m gonna share all the phrases that you’re not supposed
to speak or say or ask a lady. So let’s get started.
What not to say to a lady or a girl?
You see women are quite complicated. A lot of people feel that right? I do, i feel
the same. But there are certain things that you should never talk about, when you are
talking to a lady or a girl. The first thing that I have for you is, talking about weight.
You might notice some of your friends, she might be very close to you and you may not
have met her since long time. But once you meet her, it’s very common or is it, it’s
quite, for you it might be quite okay to ask, hey! Have you put on some weight? That’s
not a good idea to talk about, please people women don’t like to talk about their weight.
Similarly women don’t like to talk about their age, so if you don’t know someone,
please do not ask this question. How old are you? Please it’s considered very very rude
or rather extremely rude to ask a lady’s age or a girl’s age, unless you are filling
out a form. Until you do that, please don’t ask a lady or a girl about her age, it’s
rude. Moving back to the weight issue, have you put on some weight? Yes as I said it’s
not a good thing to say, but there are people, people use more expressions for this, Are
you pregnant? Oh! My god that hurt. Trust me few months ago, when I just hit the gym
and the gym instructor who saw me last and he was like, hey congratulations are you pregnant?
I so felt like taking off my shoes and throwing one at him. But then I said no, I’m not
that’s why I’m here, I’m trying to lose weight. So please people, it’s impolite
or rather stupid to say, have you put on some weight? Are you pregnant? Hmm, what’s wrong
with you? You look little different. No don’t talk about weight. Lot of people are very
sensitive to this, but you know there are times when people are happy to know, that
have you lost some weight? Specially from my previous profession. I was in a profession,
where women respected to be slim and trim and nice body. And every single person I know
or I knew back then, everybody wanted to lose weight. So that was given as a compliment.
Have you lost some weight? Have you lost some weight? Again it may sound nice to most of
the women, but trust me some people are very sensitive even about losing weight. Maybe
because I am suffering from cancer, no people lose weight there, so when you are talking
about weight, be sensitive, look around, see how the situation is and then ask or say something,
which is more polite. Hey you know what, you look little different, I hope everything’s
alright with you? Oh thanks, I am, I’m better. Good, so keep it simple; do not talk about
weight okay? Similarly the size, a lot of people have this idea, specially the salesman,
if you go to a gap store or to any fashion store they say, what’s your size? People
if you say this, what’s your size? It’s actually very rude. Because some people think,
you’re talking about their, yes chest size, so be very clear about it and say, what is
your dress size? That’s okay, but let’s say, I’m your friend and I have met you
after a long time and I’m gonna say, has your size changed? Ooops wrong question to
ask, people it again goes back to the same thing, weight okay so do not ask about the
size. Probably the person, lady or a man or a girl would know that their size has changed,
so do not say. You know this is quite common; I would ask my boyfriend, baby am I looking
fat? And he would go hmmmm; please that’s a wrong expression. Answer is always no okay
if anyone says, have I put on some weight? Please say no, have I put on weight? No, are
you sure? Yes, I’m very sure you haven’t put on weight. Okay is this dress too tight?
No, I don’t like the stitch, maybe the stitch is wrong, the dress is not tight at all. You
look fine, maybe you want to try some other designer. So weight is a very very sensitive
topic. Talking about weight, why are we talking about weight? Because we are talking about
looks. Women like to hear compliments. And there’s a saying, if you don’t have anything
good to say to a girl, don’t say it. So maybe you wanna say, if maybe the person or
a friend of yours is looking very tired and she had a long day. And you would say, hey
what happened to you? You look tired, yeah thanks I know, don’t say that okay don’t
give that expression, she already knows, probably she’s not looking that great today, so don’t
add on to her misery or some people have the habit of saying, Oh my god what happened to
you? You look so old. Please people women a girl do not want to look old, maybe you
want to use a better word for this, how about mature? Now for example, maybe you’re a
director and you’re trying to cast people and you’re trying to see what kind of person
will fit the role. And you have another, you have a lady, who comes up to you, she’s
doing a great job, but she doesn’t look fit for this role, because she looks quite
old. What’s a better way of saying it to her? Hey Clara, you know you’re doing a
great job, but I think you look very mature and sophisticated and we are looking for someone
who is naïve. People specially if you’re comparing two women and you wanna say, one
person looks younger or the other person looks old, the right word to use is mature and naïve.
Hey Clara I think you look quite mature in this, but we want someone who is very naïve
looking, so that’s a word that you’re not suppose to use, similarly, what I not
suppose to say about a lady’s face? Hey what’s on your face? People that’s something
that make a lot of us very embarrassing. I may have lot of pimples; I may have lot of
scars. Probably I’ve met with an accident; I got some birth marks on my face. Do not,
do not embarrass me or I’m gonna push you from the roof. So do not ask or do not say,
what happened to your face? Is there something on your face? Duuh, I know, it’s on my face,
don’t talk about face. Second last thing that you should not be talking is facial hair.
You know why? My boyfriend he just happened to say, hey Emmelda can you just like shave
off the mustache that you have, what ooouch, what did you say? I don’t have a mustache,
no you do, no I don’t, yes certainly people, do not talk about facial hair to a lady. I
think it’s very embarrassing. Again it’s very embarrassing; it’s very rude, if you
wanna talk about her facial hair. Maybe if you’re a boyfriend and you wanna say to
your girlfriend that you don’t wanna remove the mustache or whatever that facial hair
is, you can say, hey I really like baby skin, they are so soft, they don’t have any hair
on their face. It’s so nice, by giving a good example and not directly comparing it
to a lady. You are hinting that you want her to remove her mustache. And lastly, hey or
hey bitch. I’ve seen this in US or in the US. I was sitting at the table and a friend
of mine, she just called another waitress, hey, I swear the entire restaurant just turned
around and looked at her and they gave a very bad look. So even if you’re a lady, never
call another women or a lady, hey. The better way to use this or the better word to say
is, Excuse me Ms, Excuse me Mam. That’s a more decent and more polite way to call
a lady. And lastly the bitch, bitch yes refers to the term for a female gender of a dog.
But a lot of people use this term for women. Do not do it, it’s very very rude. It is,
it’s very uncalled for, even if you’re very casual, if you’re very cool with the
person and say, Oh she’s my best friend, she’s my girlfriend. No, don’t use the
word bitch. It’s extremely disrespectful. So these are the few phrases that you’re
not supposed to speak or say or ask to a lady. Next time if you have a friend, who is she’s
coming over to your home or you’re just having a good time, refrain from using these
words. Perhaps you just may wanna give her some compliment. So now we come to the end
of the lesson. I really hope you enjoyed it and I’ll be back with another lesson soon.
Until then have fun learning English. Good bye.