Riley: Please, don't try this at home.
Jon: But what you SHOULD do is subscribe to our personal YouTube channels.
All: Like MINE!
Hello, and welcome to "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" I'm your host, Jory Caron.
And I'm your munchie sidekick, Riley McIlwain.
Jory: Today, we're going to be microwaving these wavy Lays chips.
Riley: Questions or comments? I have a question! How long should we microwave it for?
Jory: Does it have a money-back guarantee? Because we're definitely going to be using that...
*Jory taps bag of chips repeatedly*
Riley: We'll find out right after this!
*theme song plays*
Jory: It smells like victory!
Jory: All hands to the deck!
Jory: Nobody likes roasted nuts!
Jory and Jon: WHOA!
Jory: You got that on camera, right?
Riley: I don't trust this bitch!
Jon: Are you out of your mind?!
Jory: The masks- they do nothing!
Riley: You TOTALLY could have died!
Riley: The tin foil shield- it actually worked!
Jory: Stopping, stopping!
Riley and Playlist Live crowd: 3.5!
Jon: YEAH!
Jory: Is it a good idea to microwave this?
Jory: Let's find out! Here at the Jory Caron Microwave Laboratory 3.5, safety is one of the things... (mumbles)
Jory: And the tin foil shield... And, uh, microwave...
Riley: Budget cuts!
Jory: Uh, Gwen?
All: Gabrielle!
Jory: Gabrielle!
Jon: Wow...
Jory: We'll just call her "Gabby," 'cause I can't remember something so long!
Jon: They're a dime a dozen these days, huh?
Jory: I have enough to worry about on my plate!
Riley: So, Jory did this before. I wasn't here. And they were a little bag. Now, we're gonna do a big bag! Like MY balls!
Riley: My balls? Big bag! His balls? Little bag!
Jon: Hey, Riley, do you mind if I have some chips? I'm real hungry.
Riley: I wouldn't. Let's have 'em after! 'Cause, you know what?
Jon: Alright!
Riley: This is way too big. We're goin' green here. We're gonna shrink 'em down.
Jory: I'm doin' that thing grocery stores do where they puff up the bag to make it look more presentable.
Jory: How long should we put that in there for?
Jon: I'm gonna say...
Jory: Wait- "potato"! They have a "potato" button, right?
Jon: No, just do 2:22.
Jory: They have a "potato" button!
Riley: 2:22?
Jory: They have a "potato" button!
Jon: Sounds good! You guys ready to rock?
Riley: Yeah, we're ready to ROCK!
*sound of chip being crunched/eaten*
*Jory starts Gabby*
Jon: "Potato" button! Get in here!
*Riley and Ryan laugh*
Riley and Ryan: AW!
Jory: Aw, yeah! Shrink-wrap that!
Jon: Yeah!
Riley: Yeah!
Jon: You're not wavy anymore! In fact, you could even say you're...
Jory: No, it's crimple-cut?
*Jory and Riley laugh*
Jory: Crush those chips!
Riley: Yeah, crush it, baby!
Jon: Look at that! It's like a trash compactor! It's just... It's makin' its mark, dude!
Jory: It's actually amazing HOW many potato chips there were IN there.
Riley: Yeah, I know, right?
Ryan: Yeah!
Jon: Look! It's, like, morphing into another creature right now! (in menacing voice) You have awakened the Cloverfield!
Jon: Look- it keeps, like, readjusting its size! Like, it's shrinking and then bulging out elsewhere!
Jon: Why is it switching directions?
Jory: When it has, like, too much on one corner, it just switches directions.
Jon: No, that's ONE explanation. I think the other is that it's gaining sentience!
*Riley chuckles*
Jon: I think that might be it, guys. Alright, kill the Cloverfield before it gets a chance to become straight potato chips!
Jon: 3... 2... 1... Nice!
Riley: Whoa!
Jon: Look at that! It is WAY smaller. You had trouble getting that in before, and now, it fits in there like easy-peasy!
Riley: Can you still eat those?
Jon: I wouldn't recommend it, but...
Jory: I'm just gonna go for the ones in the middle.
Jory: (mouth full) Warm chips!
Riley: Yeah?
Jon: They have a nice warm chip smell, but again, I refuse to eat anything that's been through this microwave.
Jon: Or, for that matter, any microwave that Jory has ever touched! And it's getting harder and harder! You've touched about 33 of 'em.
Jory: I think grocery stores should do this for all of their chips. It would take up way less...
Jon: What you need is a Rick Moranis, like, anti-shrink ray to blow them back up on the other side of transportation!
Jory: Feel how secure that is! It's still a really secure package.
Riley: Yeah, I mean, that just shrunk!
Jon: That's what SHE said! (laughs pervertedly)
Riley: I mean, this is, like, really convenient!
Jory: Riley, Riley, it's still a really big, hefty package!
Jory: So, you might be wondering, is it a good idea to microwave a bag of potato chips?
Riley: It's, like, "indifferent idea." Like, it doesn't change anything!
Jory: (mouth full) No, I think it's a GOOD idea!
Jon: No, I mean, it's a space-saving idea. If you had a truckload of chips and you microwaved each one of 'em, you could fit, like, an extra, like, 20% of bags!
Jory: They'll go bad immediately, because...
Jon: Oh, yeah!
Jory: I mean, there's a lot of air holes.
Jon: Instantly!
Jory: If you're trying to sneak a whole bag of potato chips into a movie theater, you could now fit this under a sweatshirt!
Jory: So, that's about it for this episode of...
Jory and Riley: (mouths full) ..."Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?"
I'm your host, Jory Caron.
I'm your sidekick, Riley McIlwain.
*end credits play*
Jon: We're not gonna need more than, like, a minute. It'll probably do it instantly.
Riley: You think so?
Jon: The last one did.
Jory: That's why I wanna hit the "potato" button!
Riley: So, you can see it? Just run backwards!
Jory: I'm hittin' that "potato" button!
Jon: Alright, fine! So, that will give you time to retreat?
Jory: Ready?
Riley: Yeah.
Jon: Is that camera rollin' over there?
Riley: Yeah!
Jon: Alright. Yeah, do it, Jory!
Jory: I hit the "potato" button!
Jon and Riley: (annoyed) Alright!
*Jory claps to synch cameras*
*Jory and Riley laugh*
*Click on episode #153 to see why Jackie loves peanut butter, even when it's a day expired!*