What's up, guys?
Welcome to another episode of Mantelligence.
A lack of self-esteem is probably one of the most common issues that affect every one of
us, and it's a big deal too.
It affects your life, career, and even your relationships.
Fortunately, like any other problem, you can fix it.
Today, we’re breaking down all the bad habits that are ruining your confidence
and helping you manifest the greatest version of yourself.
Today's episode is inspired by Based Zeus' video, where he gave a rundown of
unconscious habits that ruin your confidence.
By the end of this video, we're also teaching you how to break the habit of self-doubt
and build real confidence.
Believing in yourself is easier said than done, but it's possible.
Let's get started.
5.
Surrounding Yourself With Toxic People Your network is your net worth- a quote from
entrepreneur and motivational speaker Jim Rhon, that means, the people you surround
yourself with can change your life one way or the other.
Gentlemen, a strong network is like money in your bank.
It can take you places.
In fact, a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found
that positive social relationships, social support,
and social acceptance help shape the development of self-esteem
in people over time across ages 4 to 76.
According to Michelle Harris, one of the researchers, "the reciprocal link between self-esteem and
social relationships implies that the effects of a
positive feedback loop accumulate over time and could be substantial as people go through
life."
Harris also noted that when self-esteem or quality of social relationships is low,
it can negatively affect the other factor and set off a downward spiral.
Whether it's your friend, girlfriend, or family, staying in toxic relationships
and associating yourself with negative people is one of the crippling habits that ruin your
confidence.
Yes, crippling because you can't grow where you're not valued.
If a family member is always trying to cut down on your success,
you're always going to believe that your wins, big or small, don't matter.
If a friend has been sabotaging your chances at love instead of teaching you
how to make any girl fall in love with you, you're never going to see that you're worthy
of love.
You are who you spend time with.
If you surround yourself with lazy people, whiners, quitters, and pessimists,
then that is who you become.
So try to look at the people you spend time with.
Do they inspire you to be better?
Do they encourage you to learn and try new things?
Do they help you achieve your goals?
Choose your people wisely.
Want to know how to make someone fall in love with you?
Watch this video where we teach you how to make a girl fall in love with you instantly.
4.
Being Complacent Do you know the difference between people
who are confident and people who aren't?
Confident people are perpetually curious and lifelong learners.
What does curiosity have to do with confidence?
According to Trisha Blackwell, founder of The College of Confidence, curiosity
promotes creativity, creativity births confidence, and confidence
gives us the freedom to be our true selves.
Gentlemen, dismissing your own curiosity is one of the habits that are ruining your
confidence.
By staying curious, not only do you learn more about the world
around you, you learn a lot about yourself too.
Perhaps you're thinking, "I'm not good enough," "I can't do that,"
or maybe "I don't know how.
But that's the thing that's holding you back.
Believing in yourself starts with your thoughts, and you become what you think.
Shane Simmons, the founder of marketing firm S.S.
Consulting Firm, advises, "Whether you want to learn a new language,
start a business, or meet new people, eliminate the phrase 'I don't know how’
from your vocabulary."
According to her, When you tell yourself this, your subconscious will believe it and
cause more problems for you when this idea crosses your mind in the future."
Instead of giving in to negative self-talk, replace it with more positive phrasings,
such as, "how can I do this?" or "where should I start?"
"The questions we ask ourselves can completely change how we view the world
around us," says Simmons.
Say you want to get your ex back, but you don't know how to make a girl fall
in love with you again.
Instead of dwelling on self-defeating thoughts like "I can never get her back"
or "she wouldn't want to talk to me," seek advice from her friends
or someone you really trust.
Curiosity doesn't always kill the cat.
Stay curious about the world around you, be committed to your growth,
and be willing to go out of your comfort zone.
Speaking of curiosity, wondering how to get a girl to fall in love
with you and whether or not you should talk to her?
Watch this video where we break down all the signs a woman wants to be approached.
3.
Not Making Plans Third on our list of habits that ruin your
confidence is not making plans.
According to confidence expert Jens Weiner, "no matter when you wake up in the morning,
it is imperative that you prepare to get through the day.
Because one of the frustrating things is that you sleep every night as if you hadn’t
accomplished anything during the day because a plan can help you use your day
properly, so you don't lose confidence.
Of course, part of making plans is setting realistic
goals.
When you give yourself ambitious and unrealistic goals—whether in your career,
relationships, or health— you're setting yourself up for failure and disappointment.
This is also one of the habits that are ruining your confidence.
Maybe you want to make a girl fall in love with you in a week.
While that's possible, giving yourself a month is more realistic.
If you want to build confidence, start by making realistic plans- develop a daily routine,
figure out what type of life you want to be living, and create a vision for yourself.
We have two more items coming up in this list of habits that ruin your confidence.
Now we understand that believing in yourself is easier said than done,
which is why by the end of this video, we're also teaching you
how to break the habit of self-doubt and build real confidence.
Stay tuned.
2.
Fearing Failure There are certain risks you have to take in
life, not only because it's inevitable but also because it helps you grow.
Trying something out and failing will probably hurt,
but it will also teach you how to do it better next time.
And if you end up doing it right, it will be one of the things you can check
off of your bucket list - another mountain you successfully climbed.
In dating, one of the many things that stop men from pursuing a woman is the fear of rejection.
Gentlemen, the answer will always be no unless you try.
So figure out how to make a girl fall in love with you already
and maybe learn some alpha male body language tricks to help you with that.
According to counselor Monte Drenner, an individual's world gets smaller
each time they give in to fear, and each time they give in to fear,
it gets easier to give into the next one."
Since self-esteem is built from getting out into the world
and proving to yourself what you can do, getting stuck in a comfort zone will not do
you any favors.
Check out this video where we teach you alpha male body language
tricks every guy should know.
1.
Dwelling on the Past Finally, stop dwelling on the past.
According to life coach Sasha Carrion, if you’re consistently
referencing the negative things that were said and done to you in the past,
particularly during childhood, you're slowly destroying your self-confidence.
It goes the same way for the mistakes you've made.
Confidence expert Jens Weiner advises practicing self-forgiveness.
"Remember that while we have relationships with our family and friends,
a very important relationship is the one we have with ourselves.
It isn't about being perfect, but we can all remember that we have the power
to change," Weiner added.
Now that you know all the bad habits that are ruining your confidence,
it's time you learn how to break self-doubt and build real confidence.
First, get off social media.
If you can't quit it completely, lessen your time on it
because a lot of your anxiety comes from comparing your life to other people's lives.
Remember, most of what you see on social media are highlight reels people curated.
It's not completely real life.
Second, do the five-second rule.
It’s simple, if you have an instinct to act on a goal,
you must physically move within five seconds, or your brain will kill it.
The moment you feel an instinct or a desire to act on a goal or
a commitment, use the rule.
Third, practice power poses.
According to a 2014 study, sitting with good posture
can keep both your self-esteem and mood lifted.
Experts also recommend opening up your chest and keeping your head
level to look and feel assured and poised.
Lastly, be more mindful of your thoughts.
Listen to your internal thoughts without judgment and figure out whatever triggers
your insecurities.
Do you know more habits that ruin your confidence?
Share your answers in the comments section below.
And that is it for this list of habits that are ruining your confidence.
Remember, believing in yourself doesn't happen overnight
and is certainly not a one time job.
It's a decision you have to make everyday.