99.9% of all women are turned on if you say this.
So in this episode, I'm going to teach you how to influence a woman's imagination so that she
becomes turned on around you in conversation. Now, just before I get into this, we need to
distinguish the difference between influence and persuasion. Now, if you're like most people that
have never had coaching in this area. When you have a differing opinion than someone,
you're likely to go straight to persuasion, you try persuade them to your way of thinking,
you try and change their mind. Now, for me persuasion is an utter waste of time, you move
away from your centre and you try way too hard. Influence however, is the holy grail. Influence is
when you change someone's perspective by allowing them an opportunity to change their thinking.
So I want to give you a very quick example, say for example someone says carbohydrates are bad for
you, you can try and persuade someone that's not true by saying, "Yeah, but some people it's good,"
but ultimately you waste your time because the person's made up their mind, right? However, if
they say, "Carbohydrates are bad for you," if you want to influence their behaviour, you would say,
"There's not a single person on this planet that benefits from carbohydrates."
That's called an amplified reflection, and it's a key stone tool that I use to influence
people's behaviour, and it is very powerful. So now we've distinguished the difference,
and I hope you've understood that clearly, the difference between influence and persuasion,
let's get into the 99.9% of ways that you can turn women on by saying exactly this.
Now, normally when you are speaking to women, one of the tools that you can use is called,
demonstrating empathy. In a nutshell, all you have to do, is reflect back what a girl says to you.
You can even call it an echo, very simple. If a girl says, "I like going to the gym, because
I feel healthy," "You like going to the gym because you feel healthy." "Yes, that's right."
You know when you've echoed or reflected back correctly, because the girl will nod and smile,
and probably say yes. So you know that you can echo or reflect. By the way, that's one of the
most powerful ways to build trust with women. But anyway for this episode, you can also use
reflective listening to misinterpret someone on purpose, and when you can misinterpret a
girl as being adventurous or having a naughty side, it's extremely powerful.
So say for example a girl says, "I like going to the gym, because it makes me feel healthy,"
you can misinterpret that and say, "You like going to the gym, because you want to hit on all of the
guys there. I knew you had a naughty side to you." So what you're doing here is, you're reflecting
back, but you're misinterpreting what she's saying in a way that allows you to accuse her of being
sexual or having a naughty side. It's really fun to actually reflect in this manner, because what
you're ultimately doing is being playful. You're countering what she says with something funny.
Another way in which you can do exactly the same, when you're first speaking to a girl,
if she's holding very strong eye contact, you can say to her, "Oh my God, you're doing that
locked-in sexual eye contact thing, you're trying to flirt with me. God, I didn't realise you could
be this naughty after meeting someone." So what you're doing, is establishing right at the start
that you're calling her out. Everything that she does, you're being playful with regards to her
being sexual. And this is really fun to do, and it will get a girl to open up and be more receptive
to what you're suggesting, because you're being playful and you're creating a bit of tension.
Now, the second thing that you can do, is make statements which challenge her about
being rebellious or adventurous. Now, one of the best things to discuss with women is,
to ask them or to say, "I bet you were rebellious as a kid." And they'll say,
"Actually, I wasn't, I was more rebellious as an adult." But as long as you can open the door to a
woman thinking about being adventurous, or thinking about being adventurous,
what you're beginning to then do, is to lead her onto thoughts that are
similar. So you're influencing her thoughts onto thoughts of being rebellious, which could
be skinny dipping as a kid, it could be anything where she's rebelled against society, or being
adventurous. And then you can just delve into further, and say, "When was the last time you were
adventurous," and you've opened the gateway to that conversation, which is very different to what
most guys are speaking to her about, especially in the first few minutes of meeting her.
Now, the third technique which is very easy to implement, and I really enjoy,
is to remember this statement, "Oh, I thought you were," okay? I'll explain why in a second,
"Oh, I thought you were." This is a great phrase, and you can finish it however you want.
Say you first meet a girl and she's reading a book, "What book are you reading?" "Oh, this is
a romance novel." "Oh, I thought you're more intelligent than that." Okay, you're being
playful. If a girl says she's a doctor, "Oh, I thought you'd have a more intelligent job."
Or if a girl's a personal trainer, "Oh, I thought you'd be more into fitness, I thought you'd have
a higher qualification for training." What you're doing is, whenever a girl says she is something,
you say, "Oh, I thought," and you go over her frame with something bigger, more intelligent,
more adventurous, more fun, whatever it is, but you start by saying, "Oh, I thought you were."
On my dating confidence courses, this is one of the best dating role plays that I do,
because you can talk to any women at any time, and you could just throw in, "Oh,
I thought," at any time in the conversation and it takes her off a boring flat line conversation,
and makes it way more interesting and intoxicating. And it begins to put the bae out,
challenge her to be more adventurous and to be more fun, and she's going to get more turned
on the more that you can wind her up, the more that you can create sexual tension.
Now let's just get onto my bonus way, because this is just a great thing to do that will turn women
on, especially on a night out, because it's just a great way of being fun and playful. So all you
have to do when you're on a night out and you're having a bit of fun with a girl, you say to her,
"Are you adventurous?" No-one's going to say no to that, so every girl will say, "Yes, I am," okay?
You might get the occasional one that says no, but for the majority of the time they will say yes.
"Okay, what can we do right now that would be adventurous?" Because she said yes to your
first question, you've opened the gateway, you've influenced her thought to say, "Yes,
I'm adventurous." "Okay, what can we do right now that would be adventurous?"
Now, sometimes a girl will say, "Oh well, we could kiss," sometimes they'll say,
"We can do shots," in my experience you want to reject the first thing that they say, because it's
just funny. So if she says, "We could shots," "No, I thought you said you were adventurous." "Oh,
well, we could kiss," "Uhh, I thought you said you were adventurous." So what you're doing is,
you're influencing her to then think of something even more adventurous. And as I say,
all of this stuff is fun, it's not like you are taking something away from an interaction.
Whenever you use any of these tools or techniques, you are injecting some fun and some excitement to
the women that you're speaking to. I would go as far as to say, that if you're not being playful,
that you're probably being boring and you're being on that flat line which I talk about
a lot in these podcast episodes. So let me wrap this episode up. So
there's four main takeaways from this episode. Now the first one, is that you can echo back what
a women says, but you misinterpret it on purpose. And if you can misinterpret it as her being sexual
or having a naughty side, that's very powerful. The second thing you can do, is to make statements
which challenge here, so being rebellious or being adventurous. Again, great tool to induce some fun.
The third one is, "Oh, I thought you were..." more adventurous, more fun, more intelligent.
Pick whatever it is, have fun with it, go out try it with someone you know today,
you will get a fun response. And the final one which is my bonus play, is that you just
say to a girl, "Are you adventurous," if she says yes, "What can we do right now that would
be adventurous?" And as I say, what you can do then is, you can just say to her, whatever she
responds, "Hmm, I thought you said you were adventurous, think of something better."
So if you've enjoyed this episode, then please, don't forget to like this video, subscribe to my
channel, and if you've got any questions, please leave them in the comment section below.