Christ is risen! it is Friday and we have decided that we are going to try to
post something for you twice a week something a bit more serious on a
Tuesday and something a bit more personal and intimate in a way on the
Friday's following the comments that you've left on the video we have just
posted I remember going and visiting so many of your parishes giving a retreats
and small talks and conferences and the best part of all those retreats was not
me just aimlessly talking to you but me answering your questions because there
was a back and forth sort of conversation that was initiated and in
response to that conversation God gave me things to say that I
wouldn't have thought about before it becomes relevant and personal and useful
and that's that's all I hope from these videos thank you for your support thank
you for all the donations you've sent our way every single one of them is
received with gratitude and pray for you these small donations of yours are
supposed to replace our summer pilgrimages and all my retreats to the
United States so thank you very much for the support you're offering this Tuesday
we posted a video about patients and the effects impatience and disobedience have
had on humanity since the time of Adam to our own experience today as we are
locked down if you were in the world and we've received quite a number of good
very good comments in response to that video and you can see all of them if you
access that particular film but there is one I would like to address in this
video today because it is very important and it is something I have personally
struggled with and I feel I have something to offer in response to that
thank you to everyone who posted comments they really mean a lot because
they show us that what we touches you and has an effect but it is
the comment of crease I would like to address creased says further thus
patients mean we don't do anything we don't practice our will our ideas while
we wait patiently for with something to become obvious or for something that God
will just eventually make happen what does it mean that we keep on doing the
same things until God moves us along and I can sense the tension in this question
and I can sense that there is something of belonging to real life behind this
question so I would like to address with this one but this time I feel that there
are two parts to the question one which is more practical and the other one
which is a bit more theoretical but a very important spiritually I will
address the practical one first just in case we get bored with this video and I
want you to take something useful after we invested two minutes washing it what
do you do when you are stuck in the middle of the road what do you do when
you are at a crossroad with one or two or three four options around you all of
which could affect greatly your life which way do you turn and I have been in
that situation I have been in that situation really two or three major
times in my life and every time I've gone through something like this
patience was immensely helpful and I will give you one example it was I think
2011 2012 when I had to make a choice regarding my own life I was in da-dum at
the time studying for my PhD or the University there and there were a few
options a few avenues opening up to me I could have gone back to my monastery in
Moldavia but the end of my I could have finally found a community
on the holy mountain which is something I had been dreaming of since I was a
young novice I could have continued on the path of establishing and founding
the community on the Isle of Man or I could have gone to North America to a
small monastery in the Rocky Mountains I had no clear understanding about the
way and the direction God wanted me to take so I went to my spiritual father
and I asked him the question these are the options and put before me and I have
no clear understanding about the way to go forward and what he told me surprised
me initially and it still surprises me you're thinking bad it surprises me less
now because I've seen it working and because it works became a bit more
acceptable to me what he told me at the time was to say yes to everything he
said say yes to everything in your heart say yes say yes to the people who are
involved and do not refuse anything but as long as you do not know which way God
wants you to go forward make sure you do not reject his will so just say yes to
everything and then continue with patience to pray continue to pray for
his will to be revealed to you and what will happen he told me is that every
single door that was not opened by God will be closed every single option that
does not come out of God that is not God's will for me if I approach it isn't
prayerfully I with patience will just wheel it away and die until one option
one option only will be left and that is exactly what happened one by one for
various reasons all the other alternatives to the monastery only out
of model have become impossible and I had to abandon them until all that was
left before me was the calling to found this monastery dedicated to the Celtic
Saints to the west of Scotland in the Happy Days so I have seen in my own life
that God loves me enough to keep knocking at my door
for weeks and months and years whereas the temptations that come from the devil
will wither away and die because the devil does not have the love and he
doesn't have the interest really in me the way in which Christ my Creator loves
me and he takes an interest in me the evil
one will get bored sooner or later and his temptations the false avenues that
he opens up before us will just be closed just like my spiritual father
told me doors being closed after they had been
opened because they were not opened by God so practice patience in that sense
yes say yes to everything and play your heart out patiently waiting for the evil
one to lose interest and for the loving one our loving God to keep on knocking
until his knocking is the only sound you hear and there was a second aspect to
this question the question of whether or not we use our will or whether or not we
use our ideas in order to be patient and I think there's a misunderstanding there
there's a misunderstanding that somehow spiritual practice is spiritual virtuous
is such as patience or obedience prayer even definitely silence and definitely
solitude there is a misconception that they are passive approaches to life
passive answers to the life around us I think that's why many people condemn
monasticism for instance because they perceive it oh it's just abandonment a
sort of ritual laziness if you want to call it that way we're just running away
from the world we are hiding somewhere far far
so that we don't have to deal with the world when in fact as you can learn
these days and weeks of being stuck inside all these spiritual virtues
require every single ounce of will and strength and emotional intelligence and
mental intelligence that we have in order to survive in order to be patient
you have to make the decision again and again and again not to explode not to
react in order to be obedient and to keep yourself within a monastic
community you have to make that decision you have to renew that promise to
yourself and to Christ every single morning every single time somebody steps
on your wheel and crushes it down you have to renew that promise that you have
made to Christ Himself that you are going to stick to that life you are
going to allow obedience to kill you for this world to kill you for this life so
that the world to come the life to come will be yours it is a paradox that
something that uses up your entire energy and exhausts you with how intense
it can become it is a paradox at this experience from the outside looks very
passive because it is indeed much more visible when we are reactive beings when
you respond to everything when we kick back when we explode that is a visual
spectacle and we perceive that as being active whereas to keep yourself under
control to use your strength your inner abilities and you will you're again
emotional intelligence and your mental intelligence to keep yourself under
control that is not visible from the outside
there's an entire spectacle there's an entire explosion going on on
the inside the ones sole as I'm sure you've
experienced these past few weeks but nothing is seen from the outside so
people perceive these spiritual experiences as being just passive
attitudes when in fact they are draining and exhausting but so worth it I will
finish here because I do want these of Friday videos to be just the simple ways
in which we can communicate simple ways in which we at least mimic that we are
together keep your spirits up do not allow this experience to certain you do
not allow depression or despondency to take over you try to not get dispirited
try to do something small to keep yourself going and to help someone else
the move will help each other the easier the way out of this situation will be
and a way to help us at the monastery is obviously to share these videos about
with your friends and to subscribe and to leave comments so we can have more
videos to record but also if at all possible please make a small donation
that will support us through this year that has left us with no financial
support oh just so you don't think that we are being completely passive we have
started making these prayer hopes for you and they are entirely made by us at
the monastery they are made of black wool from our evil looking black have
brilliant sheep which are also mentioned in another video and because we have no
real bubbles you know to separate the pots we are using shells which we
collect from the shores of the Isle of Mull and we just you we make this for
you so if you'd like one if you need one or if you'd like gift someone this is
what I'm advertising our own products thank you it is weird how comfortable I
feel to ask for you and I think that is because I trust you
I have seen how much it can help us through these years and I perceive you
as friends and benefactors even if all you do is keep us in your prayers and
send us from time to time a small word of encouragement we all need
encouragement may God bless us all Christ is risen