Hey guys, welcome to Table Talk.
I'm Joe Bereta.
Oh, fuck me,
Hey guys, welcome to Table Talk, the show where we take
your suggestions and topics from places like Twitter with
the hashtag TableTalk or sourcefed,
or /r/sourcefed over at reddit.
I'm Joe Bereta.
My name's Philip DeFranco.
I'm Meg Turney.
I haven't done the intro forever.
That was weird and awkward.
Let's get into it.
Yay.
@Forestkid8 says, how do you guys
feel about guys taking selfies?
I've gotten a lot of crap for it.
You take a lot of selfies.
Yeah.
You're like a selfie a day type of guy.
I have low self-esteem is what happens.
I am.
My favorite are when you're just like, just hanging out.
And it's a super cute photo.
It's not like I'm as bad as like, my girlfriend caught me.
[? Bay ?] caught me slipping.
Ba-boom, stomach, yeah.
Or like I think that it's messed-- I've done it before,
but I haven't done it in a while-- where it's
like the sleeping, or the sleepy.
And you have your eyes closed, because I
think then it's different.
Sometimes I take a lot, I take selfies to show people
the new shirts that we're making.
That's what I'm going to say.
Hey, I don't care.
I take selfies too.
I think they're fun.
Yeah, but also it's different if a girl does it.
That's, for the most part, a lot of people go oh.
Is it different?
Yeah.
I mean, I think it's got a different reaction.
Like I don't look at a girl's and go yeah,
and look at a guy's and go boo.
I just don't look guys' selfies.
Why?
They don't do anything for me.
Why, bro?
Dude, I'm straight up chick banging and married.
I like how your example was a guy going, uh, abs,
and I'm like, I'd look at that.
So what's your opinion of guys doing selfies?
Yeah, I don't feel like I look at it and go, oh, what a loser.
He's taking a selfie.
I'm just like, oh, it's a selfie.
Yeah, I don't care either way.
Oh, cute.
I in general, even when I do them every once in a while,
tend to think selfies are dumb.
Oh.
It's like the least interesting photo that you can take.
Well, so what about if it's a selfie
and then there's also someone else in the frame?
That's a picture.
OK.
Moving right along.
I'm a huge hypocrite though, because yeah,
when I see a guy making a selfie, I'll be like, douche.
And then I'm like--
You're like, this is my face I made
when I looked at this dude's douchey selfie.
You know.
Wait, would that be selfception?
Selfception.
I didn't know it was a thing, that guys taking selfies
was an annoying thing.
Know what?
Whatever, now you do.
Jack Rose-- Roessler-- I'm fucking your name up so bad.
Jackie, Jackie R., says, if you could
have an endless supply of anything besides money,
what would it be?
I'd make an endless supply of money-making machines.
I beat your question.
Oh, your question is irrelevant.
I want an endless supply of wishes.
Oh, I literally was like, miniature dachshunds.
And you guys had great answers, and mine was like, puppies.
The problem with Table Talk-- there's
no problems with Table Talk-- is that some
of these questions, you want just that extra moment.
Yeah.
You want five more minutes to formulate something better,
because I'm trying to think of what is the one thing that I
would really want a lot of and actually
have it be a good answer.
And I can't.
Well, the thing is, what you do is you walk out of here,
and the writers down there go, oh,
what did you guys get asked?
And you go, what would you have an endless supply of?
And then it's like the best answer comes to you,
and you're like, son of a bitch.
I should have thought of that.
And inevitably, usually like let's say
40% of the time you're going to do the joke answer,
so I'm like, wishes.
And then--
Wishes is a genius answer.
--20% of the time, you're going to go super cheesy douche,
so you're like, I would want an endless supply
of understanding.
Oh.
And world peace, but you very rarely--
I thought the douche answer was like, untouched vagina.
Yeah, but when do you get to--
Wait, are we fans of untouched vagina?
Yeah, we like a lady who's like, oh, I'm so shy. [INAUDIBLE]
Meg likes virgins.
Yeah, I don't think I've ever had sex with a virgin.
They're easy-- oh, never mind.
You know what?
Never mind.
Meg either likes virgins or women
that have been locked in like dungeons for 30 years.
Were you about to say virgins are easy?
I was going to say, like, the, never--
I don't know where I was going.
Where-- I just want to know the stories now.
Yeah.
Na na na.
You can get rid of that one.
I was going to say they're easier for like, you know,
lesbian experiences.
So yours is dachshunds though.
Yeah, let's go with dachshunds.
Dachshunds is a great answer.
God, I don't know what it is.
Food, I want a plate of food that I never
have to worry about.
See, I was thinking food, but then I'm like,
I'm just going to get fat like crazy.
You're going to get fat.
Give it away.
Last night, I was-- I wasn't intoxicated.
I was enjoying California, and thanks to Eat24,
I was able to order eight chocolate chip
cookies to my house.
And then immediately after, I was like, I hate myself.
The thing that all of the GrubHubs and the Seamlesses
is like, I don't want to wait an hour.
I'd rather take the 20 minutes to go get it and come back.
I was not able to drive.
OK, well, then you do it.
I many a time have been like, da da da,
and then it's like a magician has arrived at your house
that you forgot you ordered food to.
And it's like, how did you know I wanted pizza?
The guy ends up showing up, and I always
feel judged, because he's like, it's 10:00 at night,
and you just ordered eight cookies and a glass of milk.
He's just staring at you.
He knows.
Yeah, you open that door, and he's
like, here you go, you fucking stoner.
Yeah, he knows what's happening.
He's a part of it.
Here we go.
Oh, I think it's-- is it Joe's?
There's so many things.
Like I could have a tap on the wall with a never-ending supply
of beer coming out, but maybe if I could rotate the beer,
that would be amazing.
Steak, so much good stuff.
@Jeff_LaFont says, bucket list, do you guys
have one, and if so, what are three things on it you have not
accomplished?
I want to travel the world.
Boom.
I've already jumped out of a plane.
Oh gosh, OK, you guys go.
I'll try to think of two others.
That's an elaborate question.
So definitely travel the world.
I want to get my advanced water cert,
because right now I only have an open water.
So I want to scuba dive some shipwrecks.
Oh yeah.
I think that'd be really fun.
That'd be cool.
And I'm trying to think about a third.
You keep going.
I definitely want to go to Japan.
OK.
I'd like to be in either Maxim, FHM, or Stuff.
We've talked about this.
I definitely want to be in one of those magazines.
And I'd also like to go to Foy, Belgium, to the forest there.
It's a World War II thing.
It's a Band of Brothers thing.
Talk to me about it.
I don't know what it is.
Help me out.
They fought, and there's actually
if you watch the TV series, they cover the battle in the forest
pretty heavily.
But Easy Company was kind of stuck in this forest outside
of Foy, Belgium, and they're supposed
to be, I think it's dark woods there, like the black forest,
something similar, in the same area.
But anyway, I'd like to go out there,
because I'm very into World War II and Band of Brothers.
So travelling, we all want to just see this freaking world
that we're on.
I think that's everyone.
That's most everyone.
I go through, I'm like, yeah, this is awesome.
And depending on how good I feel about my life at that time,
I fear flying.
I'm really happy, but I feel like I have a lot
to accomplish, so I'm terrified of flying.
But when I'm in a really good place, I'm like, we're good.
I'll get drunk.
I'll jet pack it everywhere.
I feel like I'm on a roller coaster.
Third would be jet pack, maybe.
I can't think of life ones.
It's kind of rough.
I've got stupid career goals, like if I
was to continue acting and doing stuff.
I have acting goals, like I want to die in a movie.
Ahh.
They're stupid acting goals.
They're not like real ones.
It's not like I want to star.
I want to die in a movie.
I want to be in a baseball movie and a World War II movie.
That's awesome.
Those are awesome.
That is really good.
It's small things, yeah.
That's really good.
I want to be murdered in a movie.
Make it happen, Hollywood.
Make it happen.
Yeah, my third one, I was like, do I want a threesome?
I don't think I want a threesome.
Is that on my bucket list, like I have to do it before I die?
Yeah, I was like, I don't think it is.
I don't know.
Let's see.
Jeremy Waters says, what is your favorite thing
that you wish more people knew about?
Album, game, food, whatever stands out in your mind.
I don't know.
I mean, I would like to have more people
to talk to about Battlestar Galactica.
That would be really, really fun, Dr. Who.
I feel like there are a lot of people
like Battlestar Gallactica.
Oh, there's a lot of people, but I just
don't know a lot of them.
You don't know them.
Other people need to watch.
When I talk to Lindsey, she definitely
likes different things.
The one thing we both like would be baseball.
That's the only common ground we have as far as likes.
Oh, really?
Yeah, well, it's fun, because she introduces me
to other things.
Like I probably would have never gone scuba diving.
Oh, she was a huge Braves, that's right.
She's a Braves girl.
Yeah.
That's right.
They're good now.
The Braves are good now.
Yeah, they're really solid.
Yeah, that's a fun team to watch.
Upton and Upton.
Yeah, man, that's good stuff.
The Dear Hunter is something I wish more people would--
The movie?
No, the band.
Oh, the band.
D-E-A-R, there's one D-E-E-R, not as good, D-E-A-R, amazing.
Also Dredge, who I showed you that you liked.
They are a great band also.
Yeah, this is kind of coming down
to a what are the things that you like question.
I wish I'm going to get you to read that book.
What book?
The Sparrow, my favorite book is The Sparrow.
[GROAN]
It's good.
God.
And the sequel is amazing.
It was like, 50 pages, just, I hate this.
The beginning's a little slow.
I hate this so much.
The beginning's a little slow.
I love that people say that about the book.
They're like, listen, just trudge through the first 3/4.
I wouldn't recommend a book if the whole thing was bad.
No, here's how my experience of The Sparrow was.
Remember when you were in school, and you read something,
and you were like, uh, I've got to finish this.
I hate this.
And then I had completely forgotten
about that, because I was reading John Green books.
I was reading Catching Fire.
I was going Fahrenheit.
And--
I brought you back.
Yeah, and then I was like, oh my god.
I must have been an idiot.
I hated reading, why?
And then you brought it all back for me.
Well, it's too bad you didn't finish it.
There will be a test at the end of today.
One day I will do it.
It just is miserable.
I like enjoying things.
I'm reading John Green book now.
Which one?
The Fault in Our Stars.
I just picked it up.
Oh my god no, no.
The Fault in Our Stars is probably the best.
I'm going through Abundance of Katherines.
Looking for Alaska is really-- John Green is fantastic.
Yeah.
But I think he hit it with The Fault in Our Stars.
I want to read it.
It's your turn, Josh.
Is it mine?
OK, last one, last one.
We're just going to have a speed round this kind of-- when
are you too old to be living with your parents?
It's different these days, isn't it?
Yeah, I think it's like, I don't want to say it's OK.
You should always strive to not be.
But I don't think it's looked down on as much
as it used to be.
I would say 18--
Independence is a good thing.
--just because I went straight to college
and lived in the dorms and stuff.
I feel like if you don't go to college-- that was amazing--
if you don't go to college, or if you're living at home to cut
costs, maybe when you graduate college,
then I think you got to go out and make your own way.
Yeah, I think it depends.
If you don't have the cash, there's
no shame in staying home, going to community
college for the first two years.
Just do something.
Saving up.
Yeah.
Don't just stay at home.
That being said, I left when I was 17,
because my home life was not fun.
but?
I also graduated early, didn't have to [INAUDIBLE].
There's a lot to be said for independence
and becoming your own human being.
Totally.
Staying at home is fine, if you're
striving to be a better person and you're
striving to take the next step.
If you're just freaking sitting on a couch
and not doing anything--
Oh yeah, then it's worse.
--not trying to become a better person,
then you're not a good person.
You suck.
Yeah, because you've got to use it as not so much as much
as a crutch, but a launching platform.
Yes, a springboard, if you will.
Oh, there you go.
That was way better.
There it is.
I like rockets.
Speaking of launching things.
Springboards on rockets.
Fuck that, best product integration ever.
Segue.
I'm excited.
Also, just before I get all the ladies going,
I can't believe Phil made Meg do that, uh-uh.
I-- wait, no, wait a second.
I took the photo, and then I go, Phil, look,
I want to make this a poster.
And then it became a poster.
And I was like, so much fun.
I'm excited.
Meg is constantly laying on beds and taking pictures.
And this just happens to be one that she wanted to sell.
In celebration, I'm wearing the bra
that's actually in the photo today.
And I know you two are also.
Yep.
Prove it.
Same bra, nu-uh--
No, don't actually-- don't prove it.
Use your imagination.
What, is it up now?
It is up now.
It would be up now, yes.
I love asking questions I know the answer to.
I'm such a fucking tool.
Is it up now?
It is up now.
That was the most TV moment you've ever done.
And there are unsigned and signed versions.
And it's the only way to get a signed anything from me
right now.
All my prints are gone.
So, boom, poster.
We burned them in a fire.
She cried.
That's not true.
I was like, take it, Turney.
Oh god.
It was like burning books, but not.
Next guy that dates Turn, you got to say that.
Take it, Turney?
Oh my god.
Wait, wait, Phil, where can we find this poster
on the Philip DeFranco network?
Oh, well, if you go to forhumanpeoples.com,
it'll probably be her naked body all over the website
for the next 48 hours.
Ding.
That's it for Table Talk.
Thanks for sending in your questions on #TableTalk
and /r/sourcefed.
I'm Meg Turney.
I'm Philip DeFranco.
I'm Joe Bereta.
That's what two college degrees get you.
Laying on a bed in a bra.
Isn't that supposed to happen?
That happens in college.
I like that someone literally, yesterday,
since it was laying out there covered it up with their shirt.
They were like, no.