-So, last year, I was in my parents' attic,
and I found the first video-game system I ever owned,
The Jorbus.
I don't know if you guys remember the Jorbus.
It predated Atari, Nintendo, Sega.
It was made by the now-out-of-business
department store Montgomery-Ward.
Let me show you guys, and you can see
if you remember the old Jorbus. There you go.
[ Laughter ] And ever since I found it,
I've been playing my Jorbus nonstop.
And a lot of the games were really ahead of their time.
Let's take a look at some of them now
in a segment we call "Old Video Games."
[ Cheers and applause ]
All right. First up, we have the --
This Jorbus game was inspired by the popular game "Frogger."
It was called "Fraudder."
I don't know if you guys remember "Fraudder."
In "Fraudder," you play a man who is in debt,
and your goal is to try and get hit by a car
so you can sue the driver. [ Laughter ]
-Level one. -Level one, fairly easy.
All you did was sort of run onto the road
and try to get hit by a car. There you go.
That would be how you'd win level one.
Level two, a little harder, because now you're on crutches.
A little harder to get around.
And also, the drivers have heard about you,
so they know you're coming, and they avoid hitting you now,
because the word's out. [ Laughter ]
Yeah. It's a little trickier now.
Now there's no reward to just hitting him.
There you go.
And then, of course, the goal would be --
Yeah, you get it. -Good job!
You're paralyzed for life.
-It was -- It was so much fun.
Do you guys remember these Lisa Frank school supplies?
[ Cheers and applause ] There you go.
These were very popular in the '80s and '90s,
and, obviously, based on the reaction, today.
So this game was inspired by the Lisa Frank binders.
They were called "Lisa Frank World."
In this game, you play an 8-year-old boy
who thinks Lisa Frank sucks,
and you get warped into the world
of your sister's Trapper Keeper.
So, in this game, you navigate the super colorful world,
and you fight off the cute animals
who are trying to cuddle with you.
-I love you.
[ Laughter ]
-Do you want to be my friend?
Ow! Ouchy!
Can we cuddle?
Ow, ow, ow!
-And then in the last level, you meet a large rainbow unicorn
who wants to be your BFF.
But unlike the other animals, the unicorn fights back.
[ Audience groans ]
-I killed you!
-And that -- you -- You didn't see it coming.
[ Laughter ]
Oh! This was the thing people in the '90s liked
they made a game out of.
It's called "Al Cowlings Racing."
[ Light laughter ]
Yeah. So you play Al Cowlings,
and you're driving O.J. Simpson around
in the back of his Ford Bronco.
So it was like a racing game,
but you couldn't go faster than 10 miles per hour.
You get it. You get it.
Hey, this Jorbus game came out in the mid '80s.
It was inspired by the Cold War,
which is a thing that was happening then,
and it was all the kids could talk about.
And it was called "Berlin Wall Beach Volleyball."
[ Laughter ]
So, in this game, you play on the side of democracy
as you face off against the Communists
on the other side of the Berlin Wall.
So you would pick your players. You would, you know,
maybe be Reagan and Thatcher, and you'd play against maybe
Communist leaders like Gorbachev and Deng Xiaoping.
And this would be the game.
-Well, okay. -Nyet!
-Ooh!
-And then, you know, you'd volley it back and forth,
and then you'd try to unlock Reagan's special move,
The Gipper Spike. -Ooh!
-Tear down this wall!
[ Audience "Oohs" ]
-And then Nancy would show up,
and you guys would just make out.
-Just say yes...to kissing.
It was a really fun game.
This last Jorbus game is really hard to find.
It was inspired by the Tom Hanks movie "Forrest Gump."
It's called "Forrest Gump: The Game."
Now, of course, in the movie "Forrest Gump,"
Forrest experiences various defining moments
in American history. In this game,
Forrest would be in classic moments in video-game history.
So you'd find out that Forrest was actually standing
right behind Mario when he crushed the first goomba.
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
-My name's Forrest -- Forrest Gump.
-And then, he was actually the guy who dropped
all those pellets on the ground that Pac-Man ate.
-Jenny.
My name's Forrest -- Forrest Gump.
-And in "Legend of Zelda," Link didn't dress
in his trademark outfit until he saw
Forrest Gump dressed that way.
[ Laughter ]
-Bubba Gump.
-And this was the coolest.
You find out he was the first person
to ever do a "Mortal Kombat" fatality.
[ Laughter ]
-My mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
[ Laughter ]
-Give it up for the Jorbus, everyone!