Start HERE To Dress Better (Fashion Tactics, Style Strategy, & Motivation)
[0:00:00] In today’s video, gents, we’re talking
about how to discover your personal style in 3 easy steps. So, pretty much every day
I get about 20 to 30 emails from men all over the world who are trying to figure out their
own personal style. And these guys are coming from all walks of life. We've got oil and
gas guys coming out of Texas. I've got blue collar workers out of California. Consultants
off the East Coast. We've got bankers out of Mumbai. I've had people from Moscow, Kiev,
all over the world reaching out and saying, “Antonio, how do I figure this out?” So,
to make this easier to illustrate and understand, gents, let me introduce you to the personal
style circle. In a nutshell, we’ve got concentric circles here that consist of style motivation,
style strategy, and style tactics. Now, don't be deceived by how simple this thing looks.
In my opinion, the vast majority of men out there have not even come close to mastering
these 3 parts of the style circle. Let me explain. The first mistake is that guys are
going about the order of this all wrong. They're starting off with the tactics or maybe the
strategy. Okay, I want to dress sharp. So, I'm gonna wear a suit to look good. Right?
Wrong. Gents, the way it works is you've got to start with the style motivation. If you
don't have this, nothing else matters because this is what happens, gents. A lot of guys
out there, they think “Okay, if I wanna look good, I need to wear a particular piece
of clothing.” Let's use the suit as the example. Here's the thing. If you don’t
know why that you’re actually wearing that suit and if you don’t have the motivation
for why you want to look good and in particular wear that suit, guess what, basically you're
wearing a costume, not a piece of armor that can help you get what you want out of life.
What is your motivation? What is your deep down reason for caring about style? And usually,
it's not because— I'm not talking to dandies. Those guys are cool, but most of you are getting
dressed, are wanting to look sharp or wanting to improve your image because you want to
get the girl, because you want to earn more money, because you want to be able to walk
into a room and command respect. That needs to be your why and you need to be specific
about this. What is it that you want to achieve? Where do you want to be in life? What job
do you want to get? It's funny. I do interviews all the time and people ask me what's the
one piece of advice you would give a guy to start dressing better and I always say to
give a damn. Seriously, if you don't care, if you don't have a deep motivation of why
you're getting dressed, of why you need to look sharp, of why you need to leverage the
science of style to be able to get what you want out of life, you're not going to figure
it out. You're gonna let obstacles and things get in your way and you're gonna give up.
You're gonna say “you know what, I'm just gonna go get smarter”, which is great. Focusing
on your education. But are you a 3-wheeled Ferrari? Are you that guy out there you've
got a great education, you've got a lot of experience, you even have the enthusiasm,
but what you're missing is the external presentation. And if you are that 3-wheeled Ferrari, going
down the road 10 miles an hour, sparks flying off, what would happen if you put on that
fourth 4th fire? All of a sudden, you would go from 10 miles an hour to 100 miles an hour
and that needs to be the why. That needs to be the motivation. You need to know that,
okay, I am getting dressed not because I care about clothing, but because I care about becoming
that man I know myself to be. And now, let's talk about strategy. So, strategy is going
to be the how. You've got your motivations. You've got your why. Now, you want to think,
okay, how am I going to use this? How am I going to send the message I want to send?
Because you need to be clear about the message. Do you want to convey trust? Do you want to
convey competence? Whenever you get dressed, do you want to convey power so that people
will follow you, so you’re gonna look like a leader, so people won't be questioning you
right out the gate, they’re gonna give you the benefit of the doubt? That is the strategy
because sometimes you want to dress to be very approachable. You want to dress so that
woman is going to want to touch you, she's going to want to get close, she's going to
be curious who is this high status man that just walked in the bar, who is this guy. You've
got to understand, again, what is your strategy to the style and the message you want to send.
To figure out your strategy, I highly recommend that you look for inspiration. You find a
style icon, somebody that you like his style. Maybe it's George Clooney. Maybe it's Ryan
Gosling. Maybe it’s Idris Elba. Whoever it may be, find someone who you just like
their style. Maybe you share some of their colors, complexions. And you feel “You know
what? What looks good on this guy would look great on me.” In the same way, you want
to look back to your past. Look at guys like Cary Grant. Be inspired by Fred Astaire. Look
at the way that these guys were able to dress really sharp in an older age, at a younger
age. You know, Tyrone Power, no one talks about this guy, but he had really dark hair,
light-colored skin. And he's one of those style icons from 1920s and `30s that, yeah,
when you look at the way that this guy was able to wear clothing and what he was able
to convey in that, I mean, guys, learn from your past. Another important part about style
strategy is understanding your limitations and this is good because if you didn't have
limitations, well, you could be overwhelmed by choice, but most of us have a big limitation,
which is our budget.
[0:05:03] So, you've got to say, “Okay, I've got this
much to spend, so I can't go out there and just buy everything. I gotta look at particular
brands. I've got to maybe only start off with a few pieces.” There's also the budget of
time. How much time do you have to put this wardrobe together? Is it something you got
a big date here in a week or you've got an interview here in a couple days? And let's
look at education. Now, there's tons of information out there, but all of us do have a limited
amount that we know about this stuff. I will tell you the more that you invest in your
education, the more that you're going to be able to and quickly be able to make decisions
and you're also going to save a lot of money because you'll know what you're going after.
And with the strategy, you also need to take in your professional needs. If you're a master
electrician down in Texas, if you're a lawyer over in New York City, if you're a consultant
out in California, really it comes down to, okay, what do I need for my day-to-day work?
Am I doing a lot of video calls? Is it something I may be going out and seeing clients or they're
gonna be seeing me? And what do I need to convey? If you're in real estate, you need
to be thinking about your vehicle. That is an extension of your style. Then your personal
wants, your personal needs. And there is a difference because your personal wants, this
is the style that you want to bring. Hey, I'm a big rockabilly fan or I'm more into
casual style. Antonio, yeah, you talk about suits and sport jackets, but, me, I'm more
of a really laid back I want to be able to bring in a guayabera. I want to bring in,
you know, my own ethnic type of style. And of course, don't forget your environmental
needs. Again, you're down in South Florida or if you're up in Northern Washington, you've
got very different weather and you need to pay attention to the items you’re bringing
into your wardrobe. All right. So, you've got your style motivation. You've got your
style strategy. Now, it’s time for the style tactics. The best part about this is now it's
easy because if you started with the tactics, there's an unlimited number of choices of
different styles, and images, and things that you could project with your clothing, but
here's the thing. Now that you know your motivation, now that you know your strategy, the choices
have been narrowed down for you and it's only what you want. It’s like walking into a
store. And instead of seeing 1,000 pieces of clothing, you only see the 20 to 25 pieces
of clothing that all fit you, that look good. Everything there you actually love and you’re
like “Wow.” All the choices are great. I don't have to deal with the headache, the
complexity of wading through all that other crap. And that's exactly what happens whenever
you nail the first two. You go into those tactics and you realize, you know what, it
doesn't matter if there are 100 some odd ways to tie a necktie. Since I don't wear neckties
and I don't need them to project the image I want to project, I can pretty much ignore
neckties. Or you realize that, hey, I'm a consultant and I wanna send that signal of
trust. And necktie is still one of those things that when people see a guy in a tie, they
think that this guy, yeah, he's there for business. You understand the power of stripes
in suits or you realize, you know what, I don't need to wear suit. A suit isn't for
me. It's not going to project the image I want of being just simply a laidback regular
guy, you know, a people person because you wanna better connect with the people on your
team. You're a small business owner and you're in the construction industry or you're in
the— I don't know what is going to work for you. But guess what? If you've done those
first 2 steps, then all of a sudden the tactics, the actual taking action, buying the clothing,
practice wearing the clothing, and seeing what works for you becomes so much easier.
And this is the point, gentlemen, when you start to practice dressing the part, you practice
wearing the clothing, and you see how it has an effect. You're basically testing things.
You practice wearing it, you see how it has an effect, and you adjust. And eventually,
you develop your own uniform. A uniform is simply default clothing that we wear that
sends the message we want to send and is something we don't have to think about because when
you've got that big meeting, you’ve got that big presentation, you don't want to spend
an hour getting ready in the morning. No. You wake up and you had your clothing laid
out. You knew that, hey, I look great in this. It’s always gotten positive reactions from
the fragrance that you wear or to, you know, the way that you shave because you’ve got
a great shaving routine to the clothing you're putting on your body. Everything has something
that is familiar. A lot of guys think that, oh, dress clothing is uncomfortable. It's
not uncomfortable. It simply is something you're unfamiliar with. But when you become
familiar with it, it becomes secondhand. It’s like the first time you go to the gym. You
feel out of place. You don't even know where the weights are. You don't know how to use
the equipment. But the 100th time you've gone to that gym, I mean you know this place, and
it feels like a second home, and it feels weird when you do not go to the gym. The same
thing once you develop your style, once you develop your image, once you found your signature
scent, you know the way that you do things, you start to trust it and you know that it
sends that message that you want to to the world. Now, if you're serious about improving
your style, I highly recommend you go over to my website, realmenrealstyle.com, and grab
my free e-Books where I talk about how to walk into a room and command confidence, how
to be more attractive by leveraging your clothing, how to understand the science of style, how
to dress for your body type.
[0:10:05] I've got tons of free e-Books, although I
do rotate them and I do update ‘em. So, if it's been a while since you grabbed those
e-Books, you probably wanna grab the latest editions, which I have over at my website.
I will link to it down in the description. So, what video to watch next? Check out this
one, guys. My 10 style commandments. I was really proud of this video. I went really
deep on it. And if you enjoyed this one, you are absolutely gonna love this video right
here.
[0:10:30] End of Audio