One day, His Divine Eminence explained to me that there are two types of disciples.
2 Types of Disciples
'There are silent [disciples] and there are talkative [disciples]',
'So make sure you stay silent. Do not speak', [said the Lord].
I asked, 'Master, what do you mean by talkative?'
The Lord explained, 'One type of a disciple is one who says, 'Sarkar, please give me this' about everything little thing'.
'Sarkar, please give me this. Please, do this for me and get that done for me'.
'Please, get my asylum approved'.
'Please, make me wealthy'.
'Please, do this and that for me'.
You just continue to beg the Lord for things.
Have you ever implored the Lord for the Lord alone?
'Sarkar, I want Allah'.
'Sarkar, I want asylum'.
'I am unwell, please make me better'.
Or this, that and the other.
The pot of desires in your lower self is constantly bubbling and boiling.
Don't try to fool me.
Don't try to lie to me.
I am saying this on account of witnessing the towering desires of your lower self.
Even if you never express them out loud.
Prayers don't necessarily have to be spoken aloud.
Even if you are sitting in complete silence in the company of those with spiritual insight, they would cover their ears
because of the deafening drumming of desires erupting from your lower self.
'I want this, I want that, I want everything'...and especially when you are sitting in front of them,
even then, your lower self continues to bark.
Even while you're sitting here, you just hear the speeches [you don't listen] because your attention is focused on your desires.
You're thinking about what you have to do tomorrow [instead of concentrating].
You're thinking about how you can speak to Sayyidi.
The lecture Sayyidi delivered for an hour and a half fell on deaf ears because you understood nothing.
Why didn't you understand it? Because you're lost in thoughts of finding ways to speak to me.
'Fulfil this desire of mine! Fulfil that desire of mine!'
Hold your tongue when you are in the presence of a scholar [they say]
but you must also have control over [the desires] of the heart in the presence of a Fakir for he knows the secrets buried in the hearts.
Your deepest desires in the heart... he can hear them.
He can hear what your lower self brews.
When Prophet Muhammad (s) declared 'silence is worship', it did not refer to being silent by the tongue.
It was about the silence of the lower self.
Your lower self should become mute and express no desires.
You may think a desire has to be verbalised for it to be a desire...
[and you may be thinking] 'but I have never asked for anything, I have never said anything'.
This is your statement.
But the one before you, in whose hand you have given your own, he can see your hearts.
He can see your lower selves.
Your lower self is constantly barking.
Nonstop.
'I want this. I want that. Do this for me. Do that for me'.
Where is that emotion in which you have a deep longing, ‘I desire Gohar’
'I long for Gohar'.
'I want Gohar'.
This shall be the change...
This shall be the change that elevates you from the stage of Imaan to Iqaan.
When you sit here and your lower self and spiritual heart chant, 'I desire Gohar'
Those emotions should constantly erupt from within.
When these emotions erupt from within, you will begin to constantly shed tears.
Your heart will become so soft [with love for the Lord].
Your eyes will well up with tears just by hearing the Lord's name.
Because now, the lower self and the spiritual heart desire Gohar.
Verbally expressing your desires and the desires erupting from the lower self are two different things.
All the people you know, your friends, your family... they would only come to know of your darkest desires if you were to say them out loud.
But those that you consider spiritual, don't think you need to open your mouth in their presence.
The filth of your lower self and the evil nature of your lower self pronounce all of your desires.
You say 'I want Gohar' although your heart is entangled with the world.
Hungry for praise...
Hungry for praise and compliments and validation is the lower self...
'I have done this today, praise me!'
If I do praise you, the lower self gets happy.
And if I don't praise you, I rather disregard you, it is because I know this praise would harm your lower self,
then you develop a negative conjecture... 'why did you praise him, he hasn't even done anything!'
'I've done so much!'
'Why can't you say something nice about me?'
This clearly suggests you know nothing about Spirituality.
In Spirituality, the one who is scolded the most is the one loved most dearly [by the Spiritual Master].