This is ActiveChristianity’s “Living the Gospel” podcast.
Join us as we explore different aspects of the gospel, according to the Bible,
and how we can put it into practice in daily life.
Welcome to episode number six.
It’s me, Milenko.
And it’s me Eunice, and we’re your hosts for this episode.
Eunice, a few episodes ago you asked me what my favorite part about my job is.
But now it’s my turn to ask you the same question.
Well, my favorite part about my job is that I get to do whatever I want.
Oh, really?
I mean, I feel that I have the freedom at my job to express my creativity in the way I think is best.
And that freedom makes me actually feel really happy and … like it is something really fulfilling.
For example, in social media, it’s such a, in a way, flexible medium.
And I work a lot in social media.
So, not that I am doing whatever I want at work, but you get what I mean.
I also work a lot with Facebook, and I think another part of what’s so fulfilling about my job is to
be able to read comments from our followers, people that write to us.
And it’s always, quite often, very encouraging.
It’s a good learning experience.
And, we do read every single comment.
That’s right, and talking about Facebook,
the article we’re sharing today is one that has gotten lots of positive response on Facebook.
That’s right, and not only the article, but also this whole topic.
It’s the article called, “Am I a bitter person?”
So, are you a bitter person?
No, luckily, I would say I’m not a bitter person.
But that being said, bitterness doesn’t lie far away from us as people.
It’s a reaction in our nature to when you feel that you get something you don’t deserve,
or you’re unfairly treated.
Sometimes it’s real, sometimes it’s perceived, but it is a reaction that I think we all feel,
and that if you give in to, you do become bitter.
So, to what extent actually is a Christian supposed to suffer unrighteousness?
That’s actually a good question, because I think the whole concept is often misunderstood a bit.
Suffering unrighteously and turning your other cheek and so on, that doesn’t mean that you’re a doormat.
It doesn’t mean that you let other people walk all over you, treat you like dirt,
despise you for whatever reason and to whatever degree.
But the suffering is when I feel that I’m treated unfairly
and then I’m tempted to become offended, I’m tempted to became angry, I’m tempted to take revenge
and my whole being wants to do that, and I know that’s against God’s will.
So, I have to go against being offended.
I have to hate that, that comes up from my human nature and the criticism and the anger and so on.
I have to really fight against that and learn to love the others, no matter what they say.
That’s a real fight.
And that’s what it is, the suffering is that my flesh,
my nature, can’t do what it wants to do, which is to become offended.
But again, that doesn’t mean you’re a doormat.
You don’t let people walk over you.
You don’t let them treat you badly.
But your reaction isn’t because you’re offended,
but your reaction is to put things right and to do it in a good way.
And when you can do that in love, then I think you’ve got a lot more power anyway.
And that is the example Jesus left.
He didn’t let things go that were unrighteous,
but He didn’t do it because He was offended for His own person.
And that’s the difference.
Speak the truth in love.
Exactly, speak the truth in love.
So, the main thing is not to allow bitterness into your heart and then to keep your heart pure.
Yeah, exactly.
We also asked a while back on our Facebook page, “How do I get rid of bitterness once it starts?”
And it was really encouraging to see some of these answers from you guys.
I’ve got one here from, Jeannie Marie:
“I always bring myself back to what Jesus did for me.
‘She who has been forgiven much, loves much.’
To grasp the weight of my sin (in humanly possible ways) allows me to forgive any wrong
… With the help of the Holy Spirit and prayer.”
I’ve got another one here from Angela.
She writes, “Bitterness starts with judgment of some level ...
Ask for forgiveness for yourself, before even trying to forgive the other party.”
I thought that was good answer. It’s about self-acknowledgment.
By doing that, you can forgive the others.
I have one more here from Melanie.
She says, “For myself I experienced I had to pray so that I can keep my heart pure
and not let those thoughts grow when they come up but instead say no when those thoughts come up
and also to really pray for the other person as well.
It is impossible to have bitterness towards someone that you are praying for.”
I thought that was really good.
So, thank you to everyone who shared their thoughts and experiences.
And if you are struggling with bitterness, you know you’re not alone.
It is a trait of human nature to be tempted to that, but you can overcome it.
And now we can listen to the article on how to overcome the root of bitterness.
Am I a bitter person?
By Frank Myrland
You won’t find many people who willingly describe themselves as bitter.
From our own perspective, our bitterness or dissatisfaction is always completely justified.
“It just wasn’t fair,” we argue to ourselves.
This is the moment when the root of bitterness is planted:
When we feel that we don’t get what we deserve.
When we feel like we have been mistreated.
Make no mistake, bitterness is a sin.
It is a sin that has broken up marriages, friendships,
and hindered many people from finding peace and rest in their Christian life.
“Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord:
looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God;
lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled.”
Hebrews 12:14-15.
This verse helps us to understand the danger that lies behind bitterness.
It isn’t a simple, innocent or meaningless thing to be bitter
– bitterness is a root that grows into division, accusation and even hatred.
If bitterness has been given the chance to take root in our heart,
it is nourished every time we agree to the spiteful thoughts that come up from our flesh.
Over time, bitterness can flourish in our heart,
consuming any care, love and gentleness that existed there before.
This will eventually come out in our actions.
Our words become razor sharp.
Cold.
Hostile.
After many months or years,
we may not even remember exactly why we became bitter in the first place
– all that is left is the sting of accusation and hatred.
Many people today have allowed bitterness to rule in their hearts.
But there is a way to break free from bitter and accusatory thoughts!
We don’t need to keep holding grudges year after year
because of perceived wrongs that have happened to us.
It is only after we acknowledge the sinful tendencies that are part of our nature
that we can begin to take up a battle against them.
This is why a person who justifies or makes excuses for their grudges, animosities, envy
or chipped shoulders will never become free from their bitterness.
This person is feeding their flesh
– giving in to their hidden desire to protect their honor above all else.
This attitude is completely contrary to how we should live as Christians.
Philippians 2:21 gives us a warning about this:
“For all seek their own, not the things which are of Christ Jesus.”
In the moments when we are tempted to be bitter,
then we need to become completely reliant on the Holy Spirit to show us the truth about ourselves.
Without the Holy Spirit as guidance,
we quickly become self-satisfied and begin to handle situations with our own knowledge
– which only leads us to fall back into old habits.
“For if you live according to the flesh you will die,
but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.”
Romans 8:13.
When we cry out in need, the Holy Spirit will be there to reveal to us our own lacks;
that it isn’t the others who need to change,
but there is something in ourselves that needs to be put to death.
Then we can begin to truly recognize our demands and tendencies towards bitterness as the sin that it is.
And the Spirit will also give us the power to overcome.
We must acknowledge bitterness for what it is and then make a firm decision to hate it with a perfect hatred!
How can we hate the sin of bitterness?
By seeing the damage that it causes!
Bitterness can never build up or edify.
It is simply impossible for bitterness to produce peace, joy, love and rest.
“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice.”
Ephesians 4:31.
It costs something to put an end to bitternessin our lives.
It means we have to give up our pride and instead go the way of humility.
Our flesh hates to suffer – but that doesn’t need to stop us!
We can instead arm ourselves with the mind of Christ and do God’s will.
We must find the bitterness that dwells in us and tear it out by the root!
We need to rely on the Holy Spirit to guide us and to help us.
Choose to pursue love and all that flows forth from it.
It is a decision that we need to make over and over again in our everyday dealings of life.
No matter what happens to us, we choose love and goodness over bitterness and sin.
Yes, the temptation to be bitter will come again,
but bitterness can only harm us if we agree with that temptation.
Instead, we can take a firm and decided stand against division, against envy and against sin.
When we make this decision to give up our own pride
and to esteem the others higher than ourselves, then it simply isn’t possible to be bitter anymore.
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit,
but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.”
Philippians 2:3.
That was a really good, practical article.
And I’ve often thought of Philippians 2:3 as my life’s motto about esteeming the others higher than yourself.
I’ve got a way to go but that’s maybe why I need it as my motto.
And that’s why it’s written, because we all need it as our motto, basically.
Well we’ve come to the end of this podcast.
Thank you for listening today, and to all of those who follow along,
those also who follow on our social media and who share their thoughts and their mutual encouragement.
That’s really great for us.
And for all the others watching and reading;
it is really awesome to know that we have this community of likeminded Christians
who are fighting the battle, strengthening each other,
and we hope that this podcast is doing the same for you.