Disney’s Pocahontas might have been a hit with the kids back in 1995, but to an adult
it might just raise more questions than it's able to answer.
From mis-placed accents to talking trees to a seriously worrying age gap, here's how this
childhood favorite measures up today.
Mel Gibson's voice is as strong and firm as any other actor’s, making him a pretty great
casting choice for the role of John Smith — except for one tiny problem: he's American.
Sure, American actors pull off British accents all the time, but Gibson didn't even attempt
one.
Instead, he voiced this English character with a distinctly American accent.
Not only was John Smith not an American, but the American accent as we know it hadn't even
evolved yet.
The early Jamestown settlers were British and they spoke with British accents.
It's no surprise that Pocahontas isn't historically accurate, given that it's a Disney film, and
maybe we would be able to ignore John Smith's historically inaccurate accent if it wasn't
so jarring.
As it is, the other members of the Virginia Company speak with modern British accents,
so John Smith's American accent sounds completely out of place in the movie.
“Captain Smith!
It appears I’ve selected the perfect location.
Not a savage in sight.”
“Just because we don’t see them doesn’t mean they’re not out there, sir.”
The Pocahontas portrayed in the film is a young woman, old enough for her father to
propose a marriage between her and another member of her tribe.
In doing this, Disney leaves us no doubts that she is old enough to enter a consensual
romantic relationship with John Smith.
In real life, however, Pocahontas was only 11 or 12 years old when the English began
colonizing her home.
This makes her alleged relationship with John Smith - which is itself inaccurate - not just
implausible, but downright predatory from a modern perspective.
Disney deliberately made Pocahontas older so that they could sell the love story between
her and John Smith, never mind the fact that it was historically inaccurate.
Glen Keane, the supervising animator for the movie, said in 1995:
"We're doing a mature love story here, and we've got to draw her as such.
She has to be sexy.”
Wait - isn’t this supposed to be a kids’ movie?
It's not just Pocahontas' real age that makes any sort of relationship between her and John
Smith problematic.
There's also the fact that her leading man is just kind of a jerk.
You’ve got to seriously question her judgement in deriding the handsome, dependable Kocoum
as "boring," especially when the guy seems to genuinely love her and clearly respects
their shared culture.
John Smith, on the other hand, obviously thinks he is a member of some sort of master race.
“Well, if they’re anything like the savages I’ve fought before, it’s nothing I can’t
handle.”
He views Pocahontas' people as "savages," and tells her that he's there to take all
of their gold.
While he does eventually start treating her with basic human decency, it's more likely
his raging hormones that are responsible and not some timely change of heart.
You can’t really get away with going from singing about killing natives to viewing them
as equals within a couple of scenes just because you met a pretty girl.
Realistically speaking, there’s a big difference between painting with all the colors of the
wind and feeling all the painful things of the forest on your bare feet.
Yet Pocahontas and many other members of her tribe appear to be perpetually barefoot.
While it's understandable that she might want to kick off her moccasins for a leisurely
stroll, and might want to avoid getting them wet when cliff-diving or going for a canoe
ride, she also admits that she is fond of running "the hidden pine trails of the forest."
While this does paint a lovely picture, pine trails tend to mean pine cones.
And pine cones are sharp, prickly things that are definitely not something you want crunching
underfoot as you are running around.
While it might be plausible that Pocahontas has simply toughened up her feet after years
of running around barefoot, it's doubtful that the less adventurous members of her tribe
would have built up enough calluses that they wouldn't feel the pain of a pine cone breaking
underfoot.
Put some shoes on, guys.
What is the deal with John Smith?
Either he's a few sandwiches short of a picnic or he's totally oblivious to the world around
him.
How else can you explain the fact that, when he first meets Pocahontas, he seems surprised
that she doesn't speak English?
It's a pretty bizarre expectation that someone on the other side of the world, who has had
no contact with foreigners, would speak the same language - and yet John Smith can't believe
her lack of English skills.
Of course, he’s also totally on board with the idea that, after they touch hands, she
is able to suddenly speak fluent English in thirty seconds flat.
Isn’t learning a new language supposed to be kinda difficult?
Not only is John Smith totally lacking in common sense, but he also suffers from a disturbing
lack of self-preservation.
Most people who encounter a talking tree would probably be at least a little put out by it.
At the very least, they’d question what was going on.
Not John Smith, though.
No, John just rolls with it.
An Englishman in the 17th century might think there was something witchy going on.
The British were no strangers to witch hunts after all, so it's a little surprising that
someone from such a superstitious time and culture doesn't think Pocahontas is in league
with the devil when she presents him with a talking tree.
Does he just have a really, really good poker face?
Or does he just assume that talking trees grow in the New World?
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