Are you trying to attract men, only to have them flee before you?
"Ahhhhhhh!"
You might be sabotaging your own game by making one of these little-known mistakes.
Some of the things women do to make a good impression on the opposite sex can actually
have the opposite effect, pushing guys away instead of making them want to look closer.
Here's what science has to say about the surprising things men find unattractive.
Overloading on makeup
You might think you look your best with a faceful of cosmetics, but as it turns out,
men probably disagree.
"You're wearing too much eye makeup."
A study in The Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology revealed that women overestimate
how much makeup men find attractive — and if you're wearing a lot of it to enhance your
appearance, you might actually be warding guys off.
Instead of caking it on for the guy you're sweet on, you may have more luck with a natural
look.
Gossiping
It might seem fun to dish the dirt on your friends, family, and coworkers, but do it
too much and it'll become a major turn off.
"Why are you telling me this?"
People with a poor self-image talk about the flaws, failures and scandalous doings of everyone
else to make themselves feel better by comparison — and if you're looking to attract men,
they won't be impressed by a show of low self-esteem.
So before you share that sordid secret, remember that the most attractive women don't build
themselves up by putting others down.
Having no life
Even if you're in a happy and mutually supportive relationship, sometimes you need a little
alone time — and it can be exhausting when your partner is excessively needy.
"I gotta get out of here pronto I've got a stage five clinger."
A guy will likely find it unattractive if you can't find any way to occupy yourself
when he's not around.
We spoke with relationship expert Sean Horan, who said, "As humans, there's a tug between
being autonomous and bonding with others."
Instead of demanding he be by your side twenty-four seven, make the most of your time apart.
Bonus: You'll have more to talk about when you next get together.
Having no ambition
You don't have to have your whole life figured out, but guys don't want to be with someone
who lacks all purpose or direction.
"I have direction."
"Yeah, towards the mall."
If you don't know what you want to do with your life, you may come across as unstable.
And while a man might enjoy feeling needed from time-to-time, nobody wants the responsibility
of rescuing someone who's constantly quitting jobs, or changing majors, and can't seem to
get on track — especially if he's got a clear vision for his own future.
Bad-mouthing your ex
While you might be trying to show just how much you're over your last relationship, constantly
criticizing your ex isn't attractive.
"Hey Tom!
I heard you and Lucy broke up.
Yea man, turns out she's crazy.
That's what they always do on Entourage."
Not only does it make you look spiteful and juvenile, but it might even seem like you're
still harboring feelings for him — and your new guy won't be happy imagining you spilling
all kinds of dirt about him to your next conquest if things don't work out.
Rather than talking smack about your ex and all the ways he wronged you, leave the past
in the past so you can attract Mr. Right in the future.
Being a negative Nellie
We all go through a range of emotions — which is normal, because we're not robots.
But if you're looking for a reason to see the glass as half full, know this: science
suggests that men find women less physically attractive if their personalities seem negative.
That's right: no matter how hot you are, an ugly attitude can hurt you.
So before you drop cash on clothes and makeup, try investing in optimism, and see how good
you look.
Having a high-pitched voice
If you've been blessed with a natural baritone, here's a good reason to embrace it: researchers
have discovered that men don't love high-pitched female voices.
"Nobody knows, the trouble I've seen."
"She's a bass!"
According to one study, guys were most attracted to voices that were "breathy" and "moderately
high-pitched."
Think Scarlett Johansson, not Kim Kardashian.
That's good news for ladies who have a naturally deep speaking voice — but as baby-voiced
hotties like Marilyn Monroe and Christina Hendricks can attest, this is also one tip
you don't have to take too seriously.
Taking unnecessary risks
While some guys love a girl who's more spontaneous and adventurous, being the wrong kind of thrill-seeker
might be hurting your chances.
Research shows that people who engage in "modern risks" — like smoking, driving without a
seatbelt, mountain climbing, and even skateboarding — are considered less attractive than those
who don't.
Not that you should abandon your favorite hobbies to get a man — extreme sports enthusiasts
deserve love, too! — but buckling up and quitting smoking will make you a more appealing
partner.
Playing hard to get
Once upon a time, The Rules told us that acting distant and disengaged would make us irresistible
to men.
Unfortunately, The Rules lied.
"Let me tell you something about men — you don't know, you don't know this!"
Playing games is immature and can give off the impression that you're not interested
in or ready for a deeper relationship — and even in the best case scenario, not returning
his texts just makes you look like a flake.
Being a damsel in distress
In fairy tales, men just love climbing towers and slaying dragons to rescue a helpless woman.
But in reality, most guys want nothing to do with that kind of drama...
Creating catastrophes to get his attention will just make you look desperate.
The truth is, if you want to attract your very own Prince Charming, a self-sufficient
girl who can be her own hero will always be more attractive than a drama queen.
Extreme makeovers
Considering a total appearance overhaul to win over the man of your dreams?
To paraphrase Billy Joel's advice: "Don't go changing to try to please him."
Plastic surgery, crash dieting, or constantly changing your style can make you seem insecure
— which is the opposite of attractive, according to Joann Cohen, a matchmaker and dating coach.
Guys value confidence in a woman, and if you seem obsessed with your perceived imperfections,
it might be turning them off.
"My hairline is so weird."
"My pores are so huge."
"My nail beds suck."
Always agreeing with him
Despite what you may have heard, most guys don't want to have a romantic relationship
with a mindless yes-man… or woman.
"Rule number two.
Laugh at whatever he says."
What if it isn't funny?"
"That's irrelevant."
Being open about your thoughts and feelings, even if you don't agree, is the best way to
create intimacy — whereas a lack of authenticity and honesty will keep him at arm's length.
So when you have a conflict, whether it's over politics or pizza toppings, don't just
nod along.
Having boring hobbies
No disrespect to reading and long walks on the beach, but some more interesting extracurricular
activities might make you a hotter prospect.
"Are you serious?"
"Dead serious.
Partner mode!"
"Let's get it on!"
According to a study published by the Journal of Creative Behavior, guys are most turned
on by girls with unique hobbies like road-tripping, performing in a band, or taking artistic photographs.
The takeaway is that people who follow their passions and instincts are sexy — so if
there's some more interesting activity you've been dying to try, here's one more reason
to go for it.
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