Welcome to my little presentation on how gratitude can change your life.
The impact of gratitude.
That's an important topic because for me anyway,
because I was born on Thanksgiving day in 1954,
November 25th. And so that topic is meaningful.
I remember when I was four years old,
my mother was putting me to bed and she said that no
matter what you do in life, make sure that you,
before you go to bed at night to count your blessings,
because those that are grateful for what they have,
they receive more to be grateful for.
And I believe that there's some wisdom in that.
I think that we sometimes don't realize how powerful gratitude
is in our life.
I'm going to share a story with you to give an understanding when I was 27
going on 28. No, that's not true. I was 28. I was 28 at the time.
I had just opened up my practice that year. In the, over the last 12 months.
And I had a real down day. I really,
there was like people had canceled, there was a, there was an emptiness,
there was, seemed like nobody seemed to want to get serviced by me.
It's just a strange kind of day.
And I I had a bunch of cancellations and I was sitting in my office and having a
kind of a low moment and I was angry.
I was angry at myself. I was angry at the patients. I was angry at staff.
I was angry at just a lot of stuff.
My mind was not into a gratitude attitude.
I had what I called stinking thinking ingratitude attitude, pity party,
ho-hum doldrum. My,
my stars were scars instead of the other way around.
And I had what I call digital cranny erectile Leitis syndrome,
where I had my thumb in my mouth and my head up my butt
and any way I was really having a low moment.
And and I had my head down on my desk and I was just in this kind of funk
and I didn't know what to do.
And it seemed like there was this dense,
thick energy around me cause I was so ungrateful.
And then finally I really hit this bottom and there it's almost like there was a
people were canceling to protect themselves from being affected by me.
And this is just the universe was just doing this interesting thing.
And all of a sudden I just snapped and I realized that, you know,
I'm not grateful for all the things that I've got.
And I actually did have a lot to be grateful for and I was not,
not paying attention to it. And for some reason,
this little thing turned in my head and I walked down the,
where my office was down the sidewalk.
Cause I was in kind of a strip center mall area.
And I went down the thing and I found a flower shop down there that I knew of.
And I bought a bunch of roses,
like probably a hundred roses, maybe not, not maybe 80 roses or something.
And I came back and I handed everybody a rose and every patient that day I
handed a rose to
and I got out of my funk and I thought about who I was grateful for.
And I, and I thought,
and I just took one moment to share something.
I looked and stopped and think of something that I could be grateful for for
each one, either their smile or their,
their mannerisms or something or just something I just looked and made an effort
to look at something I'd be grateful for.
And I had 19 cancellations that morning.
And for some reason, as I shifted,
all of a sudden people that weren't even scheduled,
showed up thinking that was the day they were scheduled.
And by the afternoon I had one of the biggest days and it was just,
they just came out of the woodwork and it was just like, my energy had shifted.
And somehow there was this non-local quantum entangled energy going on
out there that people were picking up on and they came in and that was an
amazing demonstrations of how our attitude can impact our lives.
And I saw it firsthand and I realized that if
I didn't have something to be grateful for,
now I keep a record of things I'm grateful for every day,
but there were some days back then when I was in my 27 where I would let the
external world run me more so than my disciplines. And I
know to keep those documented daily and I have probably the largest collections
of gratitudes of anybody I've met now.
But I do believe that if you stop and look at what you are appreciative of and
grateful for,
it does make a huge difference in the outcome because people
want to be loved and appreciated who they are. And if you're demonstrating that,
you see if you are projecting your values onto them and expecting them to live
in your values, or you're expecting yourself to live in somebody else's values,
you'll be ungrateful for them or ungrateful for yourself.
And you'll end up in a kind of a vicious cycle.
And the wisdom is just to stop and look at what you're really inspired by
and think about the individual that you're interacting with and what they're
inspired by and how you can exchange that,
cause sustainable fair exchanges between people, make both people grateful.
And so taking the time to count those blessings, you know,
we have events in our life that we think are terrible, and then a day, a week,
a month, a year, five years later, somewhere along the line,
we ended up finding out that, 'Oh, well, if it wasn't for this,
I wouldn't have this. I wouldn't have met this person.
I wouldn't have got this experience.' But sometimes we were letting the wisdom
of the ages occur over time and not getting the wisdom of the ages without the
aging process.
But taking the time to actually look at the time is the distinction between
kind of the animal reaction,
which is an impulse to avoid something we think is terrible because of our
misperceptions, and an instinct to protect ourselves from it,
and objective reason where we actually stop and bring our,
our perceptions back into balance and see both sides of things.
Because the same thing,
we sometimes get into these fantasies and then we find out that there's
downsides, the same things whether we think we have a nightmare,
there's upsides to it,
but taking the time to ask quality questions that bring balance back to the mind
help us do that. Gratitude is a perfectly balanced equation in the mind.
And I mean that,
I've been doing the Demartini Method helping people for almost 35,
36 years now. And I've been developing it for 47 years.
And one thing,
every one of the columns in the Demartini Method that I teach in the
Breakthrough Experience that helps people become grateful,
is a balanced equation.
You're looking at yourself relative to others and it's balanced.
You're having reflective awareness, when you do, there's more gratitude,
you're less judging.
Then you're looking at the benefits and the drawbacks and balancing them.
And then you're, again,
you realize there's nothing there to judge and you're doing that in yourself and
then you're doing,
you're taking the mislabels you have of people and asking them, balancing them.
Then you're looking at the synchronicities of opposites and balancing them.
Then you're balancing out the fantasy you're comparing things to.
Cause sometimes we compare our realities to fantasies and not appreciate our
realities, and so there's no appreciation. And there's,
there's two types of appreciation or gratitude.
There's a superficial gratitude when people support what you want,
and it's easy to say, 'Oh, thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.' But there's another gratitude when you actually see the hidden order
and the balance of nature, trying to keep you authentic,
and then you're grateful for the hidden order.
David Bohm would call that the implicate order.
It's easy to say gratitude when things are going your way,
it's another depth to be able to go in and find a gratitude when you think it's
not,
but you've taken the time with your objective reason to go in there and find it,
balance it, and then discover it was.
So there is a hidden order in the apparent chaos in your life and going and
digging and finding the balance of life, which is what nature is attending.
Every week, as I study neurology,
the brain and endocrinology and physiology and many other fields,
there's one thing that I've seen consistently is there's a homeostatic
mechanism, feedback mechanisms at all scales. I mean the,
the brain has got chemical DNA and RNA has now got
feedback.
They just discovered RNA and DNA feedback sitting there in cells that are
designed to repair them and to make sure that they're back in homeostasis.
I mean the amazing homeostatic mechanisms.
And I believe that all of those mechanisms inside our physiology,
all of them that goes on in our intuition, in our mind,
all of them that go on in our sociological effects and all the events in our
life are all trying to get us authentic,
where we have a balanced perspective on ourself.
If we puff ourselves up with pride or put ourselves down in shame,
we're not being ourselves.
So there's a homeostatic mechanism to get us back into the center so we can
appreciate and love ourselves.
And that is also the place where it's more easy to appreciate and love other
people. So without a doubt, gratitude,
which is a perfectly equilibrated mind when you see the hidden order to things,
and you're realize there's nothing to change in you relative to others,
nothing to change in others relative to you, just grateful for it is,
the way it is.
You now have a state that allows you to homeostate and you have the least
resistance. You have the most efficiency.
When you're living by your highest value, your highest priority,
you have the highest probability of this state.
So if you fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you,
you have the highest probability of having gratitude in your life.
And by taking the time to prioritize your life, take the time to,
to keep and count the blessings. I keep metrics on a daily basis.
I had goals to be able to reach millions of people.
And every time I get the opportunity to do it, I keep records of it.
I had goals to do certain amount of seminars and certain amount of
interviews and things of this nature. I keep records of it.
I want to see that what I'm doing is actually getting what I say I want to do
and getting feedback to monitor that. And as I do,
I'm making progress and I get to see the progress and I get to be grateful for
it. So take the time to prioritize your life.
Take the time to let your intuition bring you back into balance when you're
being perturbed by the external world,
don't let the amygdala down in the subcortical regions of the brain with its
desire center for fantasies, make life a nightmare.
Take the time to go to priorities, get into your executive center,
execute the plans that you intend to go to after achieve what you want and give
yourself permission to document the things you can be grateful for on a daily
basis. Because every single day, there's something to be grateful for.
Just like when I sat there and I bought those roses, the same day,
the same things were happening,
but I chose to see something different out of it and chose to take a different
decision, a different action. We have control of our perception, decisions,
and actions. And if we change our perception and by finding it, balancing it,
we then change our decision and we change our actions and our life changes.
So gratitude can and does have an impact on our life. It can change our life.
So that's why I think I was born on Thanksgiving day, maybe just a fluke,
but I think it was a message for me. And I think that that's the case.
I wrote the book, Count Your Blessings because of that,
before my mom passed away,
the book came out just a few years before she passed away.
We didn't know when she was going to go.
She had Lou Gehrig's condition like Stephen Hawking had.
And so she wasn't able to speak in the last few years. So I wrote that book,
Count Your Blessings as a result of that.
What's interesting is the day my dad died is the
day the book came out and it was dedicated to my mom's teaching me of gratitude.
So it just happened to be that it was a special moment that the book came out on
the day of a transformation.
And I think that's a message that when you're grateful,
you get something to be transformational about. Now,
take the time to document what you're grateful for on a daily basis,
it'll be one of the wisest actions you'll do.
And don't go to bed until you have something to be grateful for.
You'll sleep more effectively, your physiology will be more well, in my book,
I explained that how gratitude and love helps heal and it's absolutely
factual. And it helps you in all areas of life.
Who wants to do business with somebody grateful? Most people.
Who wants to go to a, to a restaurant where there's people that are grateful?
Yes. The same thing when you're shopping. So, and in a relationship,
is one of the biggest things that people are frustrated by in a relationship,
that they're not grateful.
So take the time to look at what you can be grateful for and document it.
I guarantee you no matter what is going on in your life,
there's something to be grateful for. You know,
even with this Corona phase right now, there's something to be grateful for.
The air has been impacted. People have figured out how to do things online.
New technologies are born, new ways of communicating with people,
reaching people that you've never met before. People, closer to loved ones,
people all of a sudden getting in shape and doing things on their own that they
haven't been doing. Self-Reflection.
If you sit down and go make a document of what you are grateful for,
I guarantee it there's something there to be, to find,
and it's just taking the time to do it. And once you make a habit of it,
it becomes a habit just like brushing your teeth.
You didn't brush your teeth easily until probably you had to kiss somebody when
you were a teenager, then you started brushing your teeth.
But if you actually make a habit of it, amazing things can happen. Like I said,
I do it every single day.
I document what I had the opportunity to do today and what I'm grateful for
today. And that list is one of the most inspiring lists of my life,
25 volumes, big volumes now of gratitudes.
So I just wanted to share that message with you today and to let you know that
it's a great opportunity to just take the time to reflect on that and put that
into your life again, try it out for the day,
just sit down and think about what you're grateful for and document it and get
back to priority because that's where you maximize your gratitude.
When you're doing what's highest on your values, you maximize your gratitude.
And if you understand what other people's values are and you don't expect them
to live outside those, and you honor what those are,
you have a higher gratitude for them also,
if you expect them to live outside their values, you're going to be ungrateful.
You expect them to live in their values and you expect yourself to live by
highest priority values. You'll be most grateful. So take the time to do that.
It'll make a difference,
keep records of it and document the metrics of what you're achieving.
And also when you're grateful and you're living by your highest values,
you tend to expand yourself, expand what's possible, expanding opportunities.
That's why my practice expanded that day. So amazing to watch that,
it expanded that day, I call it the cosmic A T and T system.
It was really a cosmic thing, really kind of cool thing,
but take the time to do that.
And just as a reminder of getting expanded, if you will,
I want to share something with you that just as a reminder,
because I know if you'll listen to this, I have a thing. I don't know if,
Emile if you have it?
I'd like to bring up this gift that I'd like to give everybody. There's a,
there's a gift that I want you to take. If you've not, if you've watched this,
you'll know it already, but if you haven't not watched it, but listen to it.
If you haven't taken the time to listen to this program called awakening your
astronomical vision, I believe by watching this or listening to this,
not watching it but listening to it,
ou will have an increasing probability of having a grateful
life. So I just want to share that with you because it'll help you.
All you have to do is go down to the demartini.ink/grateful
to claim it. It's free. You can bring it,
you can get and share it with people you care about.
You can have them go and share it. It's just a free gift.
But what I want you to do is I want you to go and listen to that because it was
a live presentation I did at a planetarium to a group of Y E
O attendees.
And it was about expanding your vision and giving yourself permission to do
something extraordinary on the planet and, and having an astronomical vision.
If you don't have an astronomical vision, you won't make a global effect,
the size of your vision will determine doing that and the greater your vision,
the broader your vision, the higher you have an unconditional love for life.
If you go and you live on the planet, the terrestrial world,
you live in the world of trial and judgment.
But if you expand yourself and go to the celestial world,
you're in a state of harmony,
you get the overview effect and you get an over view view,
and people like going in space, looking down on the earth,
they realize there's nothing there to judge. So it's about expanding yourself.
So it's easier to have a gratitude attitude.
So I just want to take the time to share that with you too,
because I know if you listen to that and close your eyes,
as you listen to it and see in your mind's eye, the outcome,
and then document what your priorities are and stick to them document with the
values of people are around you, communicate in those values,
as best you can and document what you're grateful for.
It will make a difference in your life. It has made a difference in mine,
and I want it to be the one that makes the difference in you.
So I want to take the time to share that today and thanks for being with me.
And I look forward to our next communication and have a
day of gratitude. Okay. Thank you.
Thank you for joining me for this presentation today.
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