"Normal" (Glitchy Boy & SMG4 Intro)
Swagmaster: AW GROSS GET THAT SHIT OUT OF HERE!! (LOL IT IS VARIANTED)
You guys thought I was gone? YOU CAN'T GET RID OF ME1111!!1
RUN THE INTRO, BITCHES!
(Meanwhile at FrEsH SpAgHeTti TuBBie...)
Guard’s N’ Retards (Bringing this back again)
(R0LL CALL) Chris!!!
ded
(UH OH! RETARD ALERT!)
And.... Swagmaster6969696969.
(Teletubbies) PO ALERT
Know what fuck it
Le intro ends
Swagmaster: HOLY TITS IT'S BEEN WAY TOO LONG
Swagmaster (again): NOW MANY OF YOU MAY BE ASKING
WHERE THE HELL WE WERE FOR THE LAST YEAR
WELL IT ALL STARTED
WHEN WE WERE AT THE AIRPORT (oh no, not the airport)
(seriously, don't screw around at the airport)
Swagmaster: WOOO VACATION, BITCHES!
TIME TO PARTAAAY AND GET PISS DRUNK!!!!
*swagmaster screwing around*
Chris: Jesus H Christ... my first vacation in years... *swagmaster still screwing around*
and it has to be with this asshole. (that, correct) *seriously, swagmaster, stop screwing around*
U F U K I N W O T
(Goddamnit, Chris, you triggered Swagmaster)
Swagmaster: Don't lie to yourself, Chris. (don't try it, man)
You love me, don't you? (you're pushing it, man)
Don't you, Chris. (You're on thin ice)
YOU'RE GAY FOR ME CHRIS- (alright you're screwed)
Chris: NO! I'm here...
Because you're a mentally challenged s h i t h e a d
and by law, you need a guardian
so you don't blow up anything.
damn chris, that hit ha-
Swagmaster: LOL YOU'RE GAY FOR ME CHRIS I'M TELLING EVERYONE (never mind that didn't hit at all)
Chris: For fucks sakes...
why do i even bother?
c' mon we have to go through security now
Swagmaster: OH FUCK YEAH IT'S MY PEOPLE(yeah right, swagmaster)
*musiks*
Swagmaster: Look at all those security scrubs,
I bet they aren't as good as me
Chris: You're right.
They aren't a big piece of shit like you.
OOOOOOHHH #Roasted
HEY :(
Swagmaster: Lol, hopefully they don't find the bomb.
Chris: WAIT WTF
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR-
Fuking RING RING RING
Congratulations!
You just won a...
WTF?!
Guard: dufuq?
...
CHRIS I AM ASHAMED OF YOU! >:( (swagmaster wtf)
Angery Chris: WHAT!?
Swagmaster: I TOLD YOU NOT TO BRING YOUR ROCKET LAUNCHERS HERE!
Swagmaster: I TOLD YOU NOT TO BRING YOUR ROCKET LAUNCHERS HERE! Chris: Oh Christ, here we go.
THEY ARE NOT A TOY!
GET HIM, FELLAS! HE'S THE ONE YOU WANT!
LOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLILOLBETLOLTHISLOLISLOLCOVERINGLOLUPLOLTHELOLSCREENLOLFORLOLYOULOLMUSTLOLBELOLIRRITATINGLOLHUH?LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOL
But you can just turn off subtitles, you know that, right?
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO
Chris: Fuck me. (No, fuck Swagmaster.)
le map
(What a bootiful plane!) (OOOOOOO FLORIDA)
*Crash*
DAMN THIS PLACE IS LIT
YOU SEE CHRIS WE MADE IT IN ONE PIECE AND IT WAS ALL BECAUSE THE AIRPORT SECURITY LIKE ME
are you serious
we only got off because I convinced them you were mental patient
C' MON CHRIS STOP BEING AN ASSMUNCHER AND GET IN THE CAR
*sigh*
YEAH BITCH YEAH BITCH YEAH BITCH HOTEL HOTEL HOTEL
I BET IT'S A 5 STAR HOTEL WITH A PENTHOUSE VIEW OF THE WHOLE CITY
don't expect anything grand, we don't have much money
I BET THERE'S GONNA BE BUTLERS AND HOOKERS, HOOKER BUTLERS AND GOLDEN TOILETS (Sounds lit)
CHRIS AM I GONNA HAVE A GOLDEN TOILET :D
what no don't be-
OH MY GOD THE FIRST THING I'M GONNA DO IS TAKE A SHIT AND IT IS GONNA BE THE BEST SHIT OF MY LIFE
(well shit.)
Chris: We're here
WHERE? I DON'T SEE IT! IS THE HOTEL BEHIND THIS SHITTY PIECE OF GARBAGE BUILDING IN FRONT OF US?
oh man it's not too bad in here!
U wanna bet, Chris?
SHIT
CHRIS THIS PLACE SUCKS
LOOK AT HOW SMALL THIS ROOM IS
I'VE TAKEN SHITS BIGGER THAN THIS ROOM >:(
swag i told you, we can't afford anything flashy. this place is fine
besides, its not like we're going to spend much time here anyway
THAT'S RIGHT WE'RE HITTING THE BEACHES AND NIGHTCLUBS RIGHT?
yeah that's right, it'll be fun man! :D
YEAH BITCHES LET'S DO THIS SHIT
*le groovy 70's disco music*
(smexy as hell)
i swear to god you better not sing in public
🎵 WELL YOU CAN TELL BY THE WAY I MOVE MY SWAG 🎵
🎵 I AM A SEXY MAN 🎵
🎵 NO TIME TO GAG 🎵
🎵 WHETHER YOU'RE A DUMB WITT OR REALLY NEED TO TAKE A SHIT 🎵
🎵 YOU'RE STAYING SWAG 🎵
🎵 STAYING SWAG 🎵
🎵 FEEL YOUR BOOTY SHAKING 🎵
🎵 AND EVERYONE'S EYES BREAKING 🎵
🎵 YOU'RE STAYING SWAG 🎵
🎵 STAYING SWAG 🎵
ah
Ah
AH
⍲ℋ
🎵 STAYING SWAAAAAAG 🎵
please anybody take him
i can't stand him anymore
jesus christ my ears are bleeding
YOU DON'T HAVE TO HIDE YOUR FEELINGS CHRIS
I KNOW YOU LOVED IT
YOU WANT TO HEAR MY 10 HOUR EXTENDED REMIX?
CHRIS?
ah...just what I needed.
some peace and quiet.
*sound of 1000 car alarms going off, also known as a seagull noise*
OH THERE YOU ARE CHRIS
HAVING FUN BEING A LAZYASS
piss off (heY tHatS NOt vERy NiCE)
GET YOUR ASS UP
I BOUGHT SOME ICE CREAM FOR US
OOOOOOOOO S A V A G E
god dammit swag what the hell?
LOL WHAT I THINK YOU LOOKED GOOD
YOUR SALTY ASS COULD USE SOMETHING SWEET IN YOUR LIFE AS WELL
my god why won't this lump of cancer go away
go play in the ocean or something
THE OCEAN?
NO I CAN'T DO THAT!
THE OCEAN HAS JELLYFISH AND SHARKS AND CTHULHU AND SHIT IN THERE
that is the dumbest thing i've ever heard
NO IT'S REAL CHRIS!!!
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN SHARK TALE?!
THAT SHIT SCARS A MAN
(Mohter of god!) D:
ugh
well I think that girl over there just winked at you
*giggling*
O FUCK YEAH THE OCEAN CAN'T STOP A BONER
YEAH BOIIIIIIII
thank god
OH HEY THERE BBY
I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE
DID IT HURT WHEN YOU FELL FROM HEAVEN BABY?
CAUES YOUR FACE LOOKS LIKE IT GOT SMASHED IN!
(Really?...)
Bikini Biatch: dafuq?
WAIT SHIT I MEAN YOU HAVE A FACE OF AN ANGEL
OR SOME SHIT
BBY: WOW! What an azzhole!
(Gee, you don't say?!)
OH MY FUCKING GOD SOMEBODY HELP
!!!
Lifeguard: Get ready, lady!
OH NO YOU DON'T BITCH SHE'S MINE
Bam
BRING ME THAT ASS
SHIT SHIT SHIT I FORGOT I COULDN'T SWIM OH GOD
COME HERE BITCH I NEED TO FLOAT
I DON'T WANT TO DIE
HOLD STILL YOU NEED TO HELP ME LIVE
COUGH COUGH
AH MAN
THE HELL HAPPENED
don't you die on me
OH FUCK CHRIS
I DON'T LIKE YOU LIKE THAT
PISS OFF
oh thank god, you're alive
now i don't have to pay for your funeral or anything
HAHA I KNEW YOU WERE GAY
YOU WOULDN'T LIE TO ME BITCH
YOU WERE ALL LIKE
"nah no way i am gay"
oh yeah subtitles aren't finished yet so please turn them off now
HELP NEEDED
Hungry men get underwear that's my one weakness run Chris Rutter not damaged slimy
Are you getting D. Why would you should've I came and I get shot in rucastles all the time that guy's just a pussy
Hell yeah! Quick Chris! Over here! I have an idea!
Oh my god, dude, but you gotta run. Godzilla is attacking the city and don't take your car, please
Okay fuck in the car. Oh you can say Ms excessive in the fucking car
Jesus Christ swag what have you done? I don't want to go to prison on portraits swag just save your house. Where's my thank you?
Thank you slide for making us eat it gives you bitch plug you're welcome Christopher quit ah fuck
Oh my god, no so smooth paul gondry cos. I plenty t5i noctus
Please help, I'm being held hostage. I do not know this man of my big floppy
And points to Gryffindor motherfucker, holy shit, you are actually a cycle. I want off year now given
My life oh
Jeez my head no that motion log mod my score Chris. I am so close to strangling you swagman
They said no time for your bullshit because we not go
Quick let's light in here no swag
I'm fucking done your stupid-ass idea is not as in this mess in the first place
I am going to get us out of this. Okay fine genius. What do you want to do turn your silken?
Shit okay fine in here all that you
Howdy there officers, how are you doing today?
Holy shit, did you see what they did to that poor attractive woman might on it, we actually lost him Jeff now
It's time to hit the clubs. Let's go get some bitches. I'm going back to the hotel
What already crystal party has just started let's go to the nightclubs
Have you pray clean, and maybe even some sexy ladies if I feel like sharing?
they
Chris please
This is wisdom Jay Rodriguez. You're welcome here right now lots of affect. That's not even my name
Fucking Mara the shot Chris don't go who's gonna be my wingman. I wouldn't be your wingman. Even if you paid me fine
Who's going to be the ugly friend? Who's kind of make me look like a sexy move all?
Holiday okay ever since this vacation
I had to bail you out on the airport listen to your shitty sons you almost night
And now we a wanted felons don't forget my the local police car
Thought you had done
Cuz cuz wait, I want to tell you something ugh. What what is it? Um? I'm
Pregnant Chris, I'm Greg Mendell here the father
She's
Jesus that walk back alone was probably the best part of his entire trip now to sleep and hopefully when I wake up he'll be
In the gutter drunk for arresting me
Maybe I must have caught it on him. He was just trying to have fun shit
Okay Chris, I know permit at the end
I know life on top
but I am going to make this better since you want to go out to her tonight drop the birdie dealer I
Brought a ton of beer we gotta get her in this hotel angry not have a good time
You know lot that's the best idea you can all day throw me a beer dog have dijanna cantaloupe is fun
Oh
Man my head
Man last night was fun Chris. Let's do it again
Jesus my head feels like it's gonna explode. Oh you pussy. I'm fit as a fiddle
It's probably ruined service, can you get that swag I'm so bad
You know what I think I'm sick after all cough cough, let's stay and
Gaming, that's the story of how we work on for one year now. Let's hardly ever sleep
Retarded subtitles by someone
now leave