What just happened in the car? What word do you think I said? Did I just swear?
I bet some of you think I said the f-word.
Well, I did say a word that begins with F, but I said, "Fudge!"
In this video, I'm not going to be using highly offensive language.
Instead, I'll share alternatives that still allow you to express emotions like anger, frustration, and surprise.
Every language has a lot of bad words, and English is no different.
We also have a lot of ways to talk about using these bad words.
"Swearing" is probably the most common verb. It's intransitive. No object.
So someone could say, "Don't swear."
Or "I just heard my neighbor swearing outside."
You can swear at someone. For example, the taxi driver swore at the man on the bike.
We can talk about "swear words," a countable noun.
My children didn't really learn swear words until they went to school.
I hear
people say the F-word and
the SH-word and like the B-word and like all the swears.
I try not to swear in front of my children to set a good example,
especially now that they're older and they hear a lot of swear words at school, on the bus, and of course in movies.
My children tend to talk about "swears"
as a countable noun, as in: A kid got in trouble today for saying a swear in class.
Personally, I don't use the word "swear" this way. I'd prefer to talk about a "swear word" or
"swear words."
I want to give my kids my model and show them that you can express anger without coarse words.
Swearing doesn't automatically make you cool and mature.
In fact, if you swear in the wrong place at the wrong time
you can appear rude and
stupid for not having the sensitivity for the situation or
the respect for the company you're in.
For that reason, we might say the word "fudge" in front of young children. It's more appropriate than the f-word.
Sometimes we talk about dropping an f-bomb; that just means you said the f-word.
My children might mention that a student got in trouble for saying the SH-word, another four-letter word.
You likely know that this SH-word refers to poop.
You can be sure that if the student got in trouble they didn't say, "Shoot!"
"Shoot" is a much milder alternative.
"Shoot" is okay to say in front of anybody.
"Shoot" is a word we say when we're angry or frustrated, and it's not really offensive.
Another mild alternative is "crap."
And the variation of that is "cripes."
But some people consider the word "cripes"
outdated, so I don't recommend using it. If you feel the need to say something and you're angry you can say, "Crap!"
You can get very creative with the word "crap," as in, "He's full of crap."
"That's a bunch of crap."
"That film is a piece of crap."
We even have an adjective form, for example:
That's a crappy thing to do.
CRAP and SHOOT can be considered mild oaths.
OATH has different meanings, but one definition is a swear word.
He said a mild oath in frustration.
She muttered an oath and rolled her eyes.
Offensive language is a general term for any rude words.
When movies post warnings for viewers, especially parents, they might state that there's offensive language in the film.
You may also see the word
"profanity," which refers to dirty words and rude language.
If you swear a lot, people may say you swear like a truck driver or you swear like a sailor.
I hear the comparison to a truck driver more often.
Some people thoroughly enjoy
swearing, and I suppose that's all right as long as they're in the company of people who also think that kind of talk is
perfectly natural.
In fact, someone might express admiration for another person's fluency in profanity and say,
"Joe can cuss real good."
Cussing is swearing. So to cuss is to swear. "Cussing" is an informal word.
Just as you can swear at someone you can cuss someone out.
But cussing someone out suggests
using a lot of swear words
because you're very angry with someone.
So an athlete might say. "The coach cussed me out for missing practice."
The coach was very angry and swore a lot to express his anger.
Is there swearing in hockey? Yeah, of course. There's swearing in every sport.
Do players get away with it?
Sometimes.
And if you don't?
Well, if you say it to the referee, you'll get a penalty and
if the coach hears it, he'll tell you to stop.
But there's a difference in my opinion between
cussing and cursing and
using lewd language or what's called vulgarity.
Cursing is basically the same as swearing. You can curse and say, "Damn!"
Which isn't really nice, but it's not terribly shocking.
Personally, I avoid that four-letter word and say, "Dang!"
Some people use DARN or
DARN IT as an alternative.
Similarly, some people use HELL a lot as in, "What the hell?"
Which isn't very nice. An alternative is HECK. So my children sometimes hear me say, "What the heck?"
Especially when I'm driving.
So there can be strong cursing and mild cursing, but lewd language and
vulgar words are highly offensive.
This kind of language refers to sex in a rude way, and it's generally
disrespectful toward women, so I, for one, don't want to hear it. And, guys,
you're not gonna win women over with that kind of talk.
You also have to be careful with the words 'God' and 'Jesus.' Be sensitive to who's around and who's listening.
It's generally become acceptable to say, "Oh my God!" in surprise or "Oh Lord!"
in frustration or disappointment.
Variations include LORDY! GOOD LORD!
Related words that simply express surprise are: Gosh. Oh my gosh!
Goodness. Goodness gracious.
Good grief.
Holy moly!
Those aren't even considered swear words.
As with the name of God, you might want to be careful using 'Jesus.'
A milder more polite variation of Jesus is "Jeez/Geez."
So you could say,
Jeez. Calm down. Or...
Geez. You scared the heck out of me.
There are some silly variations of JEEZ.
You'll hear, "Geez Louise! What happened?" Or "Jeez maneez! You almost made me fall."
I don't really recommend using these silly expressions, but don't be surprised
if and when you hear them. These are expressions of surprise.
They're not considered bad words.
I'd say the most common swear word in English is the f-word.
I'm not going to say that I've never said it. I have, in extreme anger, but it's not my habit to drop f-bombs.
My daughter has picked up my habit of using an alternative:
freaking or
freakin'. In fact, I think she uses it more than I do.
But when I'm angry, my kids might hear me say, "Freakin heck!"
Or when I'm driving and I get angry at another driver, I may say something like,
"Hello? Turn on your freakin' lights."
Of course the driver the other driver doesn't hear me, but I still feel the need to say something because I'm angry.
There are other words that can substitute for the f-word. Some use "blasted," as in
"Stupid, blasted pothole!"
I mentioned "dang" before. "Dang" could be used as an adjective. For example, "Where's my dang phone?"
My personal opinion is that the English language is rich in vocabulary,
so why not enjoy it all and use descriptive words instead of common swear words?
If you overuse any particular swear word, your speech might just sound coarse and
limited rather than cool and natural.
But I understand the need to vent anger through words, to vent frustration, and to express surprise.
So in the end, cursing is going to happen. I know.
Just make sure it doesn't happen in the wrong place at the wrong time.
And I heard swearing in a work environment.
But keep in mind it depends on culture. It depends on the relationships that you have with your
coworkers, with your peers, your bosses, your subordinates...
even with clients.
Also, you need to understand that there are different degrees of swearing.
A taboo-like swearing would probably
not be heard in the office environment, but things like "what the f---?"
for example
is a fairly common occurrence.
And don't forget you always have the option of using
sarcasm. You can use nice words with a bad meaning, as in:
Nice. Real nice.
Oh great.
That's just perfect.
To wrap up, let's take one last look at the milder words you can use
to express your anger, frustration, or surprise.
Shoot!
Crap!
Dang!
Darn!
Darn it! Good Lord!
Lordy! Holy moly!
Oh my gosh!
Goodness! Goodness gracious!
Good grief!
Geez!
Freakin'... freaking heck!
Blasted. Heck. What the heck?
I certainly don't encourage you to use all these words, even the milder ones, in every conversation.
But if you're already in the habit of swearing and you swear like a truck driver,
just remember that there are
alternatives to dropping f-bombs.
I'll end here, so that's all for now.
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