You consider yourself smart, friendly, a good conversationalist, interested in many subjects.
So why would any guy not want to take you out on another date?
Well, maybe it's because your dates don't always feel like dates.
Sometimes you're his therapist. Sometimes you talk about business.
Sometimes you barely talk at all. If you have trouble connecting with
men on a sexual level on dates, these flirty questions should be able to get things going.
Stick around. I am Evan Marc Katz, dating coach for smart,
strong, successful women and your personal trainer for love. Welcome to the Love U Podcast. Keep
listening to discover five flirty questions to ask a guy you're interested in. When we’re done,
I’ll let you know how you can apply to Love U to create a passionate relationship that
makes you feel safe, heard, and understood. So let's start off by saying something that
I think is worth saying at the top of a flirting podcast. Flirting is not a series of lines that
you memorize.I have an entire week of content on Love U (week nine or something like that)
based on flirting alone. But what makes flirting most effective is not the line, and it's the
attitude that goes behind the line. It's what underlies all your interactions, your texts,
your phone calls, your first dates, how you conduct yourself in the bedroom.
It's the assumption that every man that you're talking to finds you attractive,
wants to sleep with you, wants to date, wants to marry you. Start with that assumption. And
once you come from this place, this place of abundance and confidence, you can stop
worrying about what guys think, and it becomes a lot easier to flirt organically and confidently.
But if you're not a natural flirt and you need a couple of lines to drop into your dates,
you could always use one of these five lines. Number 1: "Do you work out?"
I know it's a little lame, but at the same time, it's kind of a layup. It's
an easy thing to ask because it hints towards the physical,
but it's not too overt. It's not too sexual. You happen to either look at his physique or be
holding his arm when you're walking down the street and then you take notice of his
musculature. And just this open-ended question "Do you work out?" Allows him to feel good about
himself because you think he's attractive, allows him to feel more confident in himself,
more sexual and allows him to talk about himself. And we do know guys like to talk about themselves.
Number 2: "What do you find most attractive in a woman physically?"
I generally don't like to be too on the nose. And yet sometimes on the nose works,
this speaks to what a guy's physical taste is, right? It takes the conversation to a
more directly physical level, and it reveals the kind of thing that he might not normally volunteer
to you because you point-blank asked him. But it's not so personal as to be uncomfortable.
It also gives him an opportunity when you say, "What do you find most attractive in a woman?"
Physically, it gives him the opportunity to turn the question around to you,
and you can then use that opportunity to. Say what you find attractive in him, whether it's his
light colored eyes or his muscular legs. You can talk about the thing that you find attractive.
Now it becomes symbiotic, it becomes a mutual admiration society,
all because you precipitated it with this relatively innocent question.
Number 3: "What non physical thing do you find most attractive in a woman?"
It's really easy for a guy to say, I'm a boob man or I'm a butt guy.
That's nothing. But this is a great opportunity to learn what makes a guy tick. It also is a
great opportunity to solicit a compliment. Because you're asking him the question,
"What non physical thing do you like?" Chances are because you're the one who's asking him,
he's probably going to say something about you. It also shows that there's more to you
than the emphasis on the physical. And it forces him to think aloud what he
actually values. Because a lot of guys don't spend too much time thinking about what's important to
them. We're also driven by looks. That's what gets you in the door. This is a visceral attraction,
animal attraction, and we often don't stop to think, really, what is it that I value? And I
think you can learn a lot about a guy from that answer, not to judge him, not to use this as
some sort of litmus test. But if you ask me, what do I value most in a partner? I value emotional
stability. You ask me, you know, in 2021 Evan Marc Katz. I might not have answered that way when I
was single, but right now, someone that I could be myself and resolve conflict with without any drama
is what I value more than anything. I think that's a pretty revealing answer.
Number 4: "What's the craziest thing you've ever done in bed?"
Now, again, really on the nose, it's direct, but it's also kind of fun,
especially if you can create this in a flirty, safe way. It'll lead to some crazy stories. You
have to put your judgment aside. You can't ask him a question and then judge him for the answer.
And this is not really a fact-finding mission. This is just a way to be a little flirty, a little
sexual without having to do anything yourself. You're just learning something about him.
And it also gives him an opportunity to ask him your story. And you can think about what
story you want to reveal. A story that's more likely to excite him than to turn him off.
"I took on five guys in one night" might be a crazy story. Might not be your best
first date story. So just in general, pushing the envelope a little bit, but
knowing where your line allows the conversation to go there without necessarily tipping too
far over into something that you can't handle. Remember, you don't have to ask these questions.
These are food for thought for you to consider if you want to spice up the date a little bit.
And number 5: "Tell me your idea of the perfect date."
Chances are you're not going to be on the perfect date. Chances are you're going to
be doing something stupid, like coffee or hiking or something like that, which may be someone's
idea of a first date. But I think if you dig a little bit deeper, either what's your idea of the
perfect first date or what's the greatest date you ever had? What made the pacing? It's thinking out
not to what you're doing right here, the second, but about what you guys might do together
in the future. It allows him to consider the kind of date he may want to take you on one day.
It allows him to dream big and then sort of step up into that kind of dream. So when he's telling
you about his ideal first date, presuming it's something that sounds good to you,
you could just turn it around and ask him. All right, man,
what are you waiting for? With him, knowing something gives you the kind of date that
he considers the best first date. It's kind of a challenge that comes from a place of confidence.
So I emphasized I'm generally not big on canned lines,
but a well-placed one that doesn't sound scripted can nudge the conversation to a flirtier place.
And, most importantly, keep you out of the friend zone.
So what flirting lines have worked for you in the past, if you could remember anything?
Put it in the comments section below. Really appreciate you. Thank you for your time.
My name is Evan Marc Katz. Thank you for tuning in to the Love U Podcast. For more episodes like
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safe, heard, and understood, look for the link below and apply for coaching with me in Love U.
Go to www.evanmarckatz.com and watch that free video that's on my page about how to
gain confidence, attract quality men and fix your broken man picker once and for all.
When you're done with that video, you could apply to Love U to join hundreds of other smart, strong,
successful women in the coaching community where women like you actually get the unconditional
love that you deserve. See you there!