Unlikely lines from a costume drama.
Madam, I'm in line to the throne
and, as such, we shall be dining somewhere that befits my title.
Pizza Express, Woking!
BUZZER
Ah, Batman! I mean, I suppose technically it's a costume.
BUZZER
Heathcliff, Heathcliff, let me in, let me in!
I just wondered if we could count on your vote on December 12th?
BUZZER
Generally, I am a footman, sir.
Although I do also like the bottom and the breasts.
BUZZER
Just reading this review from the Anne Boleyn musical.
It says, "It was a good idea, but I didn't like the execution."
Lord Windermere is famed for his opulent balls.
I've heard he wet-shaves them.
BUZZER
LABOURED SCOTTISH ACCENT: Aye, ya can take our land!
Ya can take our lives!
But ya cannae do our accent!
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
BUZZER
You are Jane Eyre.
So this must be your brother, Nike.
BUZZER
That new servant girl is so cold and unresponsive.
Watch this.
Alexa? Alexa?
Your Lordship, I am delighted and excited
by the unexpected turn our correspondence has taken.
I await with feverish excitement
the next portrait of your engorged penis.
Please accept this crude sketch of my boobs...
..as a token of my affection.
BUZZER
My heart is in my mouth.
My liver is in my anus.
Jesus, this corset is tight!
Carson, please get your hand out of my trousers.
When I told you to go below stairs, it wasn't a euphemism.
BUZZER
My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius.
So, yeah, that's Mike, Alpha, X-ray, India, Mike...
BUZZER
As the ruler of this country, I demand some respect.
When you see me, you will bow
and you will say "Yas...queen!"
BUZZER
Mr Darcy, I could never belong to you, I'm promised to another.
But I could give you a quick handy behind the bushes.
BUZZER