“How to Discover What you Want”
Today we are going to talk about “How to Discover What You Want”.
Your desires are responsible not only for your expansion,
but for the expansion of this universe.
You are coming to preferences all day every day.
For most of you this is a subconscious process.
But those people who enjoy the most happiness in this life,
make this subconscious process a conscious one.
The people who get what they want,
take the time to figure out what they want first.
There is a reason why when you sit there
in your aspect of I don't know what I want,
that you don't get the answer.
It's because you can't be vibrating
at the same frequency as a question and be a match to the answer.
Every time we focus on:
“I don't know what I want.”
“What is it that I need to have in my life.”
“What is it that I'm supposed to be doing.”;
the answer to those questions can't participate in your reality.
You are literally preventing them by activating
only the vibration of not knowing.
For this reason, you need to work your way into knowing first,
before you get the answer to what you really want.
The fastest way to do this is to begin to visualize
what it might feel like to have the answer.
So, when you lose your keys, what might it feel like to find those keys?
When you don't know what you want,
what might it feel like to know what you want?
What might it feel like to know what your purpose is?
Pay attention to your internal monologue that's in a panic mode,
that continues to reinforce the idea that you don't know what you want.
Shift those thoughts to potentially knowing what you want.
Shift those thoughts to letting go of the need to know.
Because you can't get this wrong.
As you are living your life,
you are coming to preferences, whether you know it or not.
And those preferences are causing the expansion of the universe
and that's the reason you came here in the ﬁrst place.
So whether you know what you want or you don't know what you want consciously,
the universe is getting the message and expansion is occurring.
Play the game of what don't you want.
Many of you may not know what you want,
but you deﬁnitely have a feeling of resentment or resistance within you.
And what that is, is you paying attention to what you don't want.
So pay attention to what you don't want,
and then play a game of opposites.
Once you ﬁgure out what you don't want,
spin it around and ﬁgure out what the opposite of that would be for you.
Now, the opposite of what that would be for you
might not be the most obvious answer.
For example: if you say:
“I don't want to be sick”,
the opposite of that might not be: “I want to be well”.
It might want to be:
“ I want to have enough trust in my body, to know that regardless
of what happens to it, it is always in alignment with health.”
Take time to ﬁgure out why things really bother you.
My core belief exercise, which I demonstrated in the shadow work video,
is a really good one to use for this.
If you ﬁgure out the details of why you don't like what it is that you don't like,
that will give you a more accurate idea about what it is
that you actually do want.
Begin mentally playing out how something could change.
So, if you start with the aspect of “I don't like the job that I am in”,
start playing out what it might look like if it would improve
and continue to improve and continue to improve.
When you are playing out this visualization
of improving whatever it is that you don't like,
ask yourself: What would be better?
Now, that might look like a new scenario in your mind
and then ask: What would be better than even that?
You want to continue following this and following this
until you get to what seems like the best possible scenario for you,
and that is what you really want.
It is best to when trying not to limit the universe,
to work in terms of essence and not details.
Instead of focusing on the details of your current job
and using them to try to ﬁgure out the details of your next one,
focus on the feelings.
What does your current job feel like emotionally?
Are you inspired or are you bored?
Are you happy there or are you angry?
Do you feel powerless?
It doesn't matter why you feel the way that you do,
you just want to identify those negative feelings.
And now, you can use that list to ﬁgure out
what you'd like to feel:
“I'd like to feel inspired”, “I'd like to feel excited”,
“I would like to feel as if I'm a contribution at my job.”
Perhaps what you want is a job that allows you the freedom
to be with your family more.
Perhaps you want a job that makes you feel more free.
Do you feel insecure in your current job?
Then most likely what you want is a job to makes you feel secure.
We could consider this a pivoting exercise.
Figuring out very accurately what I don't want,
helps me to know what I do want,
and once I know what I do want, I can focus in the direction of that.
Have the guts to ask yourself:
“what do I want?”
For most of you who are asking this question,
you have lived a life where it's been proven to you again and again
that life is not about what you want,
itʼs about what you should be doing,
it's about making the other people in your life happy.
This could not be farther from the truth.
But if you've been living that kind of life,
there's a high likelihood that you haven't even ask yourself at this point
“what is it that I want.”
Play a game of no limits,
pretending that this universe could become exactly
what you want in the best case scenario,
a disneyland type of scenario.
Now take out a paper and I want you to write down:
“I want... ”.
Now with the hand that you don't usually write with,
I want you to begin writing anything that comes to your subconscious mind,
any thought that pops up. Just write it down without judgment.
It doesn't matter how ridiculous this seems.
Once you are done with that exercise, at the bottom of the page
I want you to ask yourself this question:
“If I could do or be anything in this life,
anything at all, what would I want to do or be?"
Once you have done these exercises, which I have previously explained,
I want you to ask yourself:
“Why you want these things which you've discovered that you want.”
“Why” is one of the most valuable questions in the universe.
It pulls you into the vibrational vicinity of what it is that you want.
And you might be surprised what it is that you really want.
For example:
We could start with: “I want a new job”.
If you asked “Why I want a new job”,
the answer could be,
“So I like what I'm doing for a living”.
We can ask “Why would you want to like what you are doing for a living?”,
the answer could be “Because I want to feel good about myself”.
“I want to feel good about myself”, in this scenario, is the root desire.
You have whittled down your desires to the root which is:
“I want to feel good about myself”.
Make a list of absolutely everything that makes you feel good,
that makes you feel passion or joy.
On this list, we want everything, however big or small, to be on it.
So, things as “ I love falling in love”,
and things as small as:
“I love the way it feels when my shoes really ﬁt”.
When you take time to really pay attention to how you feel
and the things which make you feel good,
you will become closer to the answer to:
“What I want in my life”.
Because your purpose is always
in tandem with what you feel joy and passion doing.
Pay attention to your feelings of envy.
Envy is a good indication about what it is that you want.
True, when you are feeling envy,
itʼs that you are watching something you want
that you don't think you can have,
but it is still, you looking at something you want.
Pay attention in your environment, in your world,
for those people who looked the most happy to you.
That is also an indication of what stands out as your deﬁnition of wanting,
your definition of what it is
that would pull you the most in line with what you want.
When you don't know what you want, you can ﬁnd your life
in a kind of stalemate:
“I'm not really moving because I don't know whether I want that
or that or that,
and I donʼt really feel inspired towards anything.”
Ironically enough, this is a good time to take some kind of action.
The universe is not worried about you getting it wrong, because you can't!
And at least, taking an action,
jumping at an opportunity that at least feels a little bit good
or a little bit right, is at least energy moving.
And once you get that energy moving in the right direction,
in any direction,
you will be able to have it become much more clear
what it is you don't like and like.
So, if you think that you want a new job,
if it feels good to go look for a new job,
go look for a new job and take one.
Once you are in that new job,
you will have a more accurate idea about whether you actually
want that kind of job or not,
and that gets you closer to what you want.
Don't get yourself wrapped up in the idea of mistakes.
You really can't make a mistake here on this planet,
because everything is ever evolving,
there is nothing that you can't change.
So, if you make a decision that you decide you don't like down the road,
you can shift that, this quick.
Trying something, is very beneﬁcial for you
to ﬁnding out what it is you actually want and donʼt want.
You must allow yourself throughout your life,
to ask yourself the question
“What do I want?” and allow the answer to change.
We are ever evolving on this planet, and every planet.
We are always changing.
We are always becoming more.
This universe was designed for expansion.
So, what you want one day,
may not be what you want the next,
and that has to be okay, if you want to live a happy life.
We can't ever see the ﬁnish line,
that is because the ﬁnish line never stays in one place,
and this is the way that the universe wanted it.
As we walk through our lives making decisions
and ﬂowing energy towards that which we want,
when we achieve our various goals, the ﬁnish line keeps moving.
Every time we take a step towards the end goal,
it moves further and further away,
so let that be okay.
You will never get it done here and you can't get it wrong.
Source does not stand in a space of perfection
that you are now trying to catch up to.
You are telling it through every experience
that you are living, what to become.
You are causing the expansion.
You are doing this whether you are conscious about it or not.
You really can't get it wrong.
The reason we want you to ﬁnd out what you want,
it is not because there is some purpose you're meant to fulﬁll,
and if not allʼs for naught.
It is because, we get more expansion
out of you following your joy.
When you follow your joy and you ﬁgure out what it is that you want
and you line up with it and you get it,
you are in a new point of perspective.
So, more expansion could come
out of those people who line up with what they want,
than those who never ﬁnd out what they want.
But expansion comes out of them inevitably.
So, many of you know that I constantly tell people
that the how in this universe is not your job.
When you are going about saying things like:
"I want love, but love must come through this person named
Brad or this person named Christine",
you are disabling the universe.
Because you are telling the universe how
that thing you want will come to you.
What if I was to take this a step further and tell you
that even saying I want love or I want money is a “how”.
The reason is this:
there is not one thing on this earth that is not done for the same reason
and that reason is:
“I want to feel happy.” “I want to feel better”.
Now, what if you made that the end goal?
What if that is really the “I want” and everything else is just a “how”?
What if the universe knows better for you, than you do,
how your happiness is going to come to you.
Why are we so afraid of that?
How often is it that you meet people
and you ask them what they really want in life,
and they look and say: "Happiness."
Itʼs kind of an inevitable.
Of course everyone wants happiness.
So, why is it are we so afraid of making that the end goal?
That thing which we are really aiming for?
It is because we are all pretty convinced that if we say:
“I want happiness above all else”,
the universe will make us very very happy,
but very very poor,
very very happy, but very very alone.
The universe knows you so much better than that.
That implies a level of distrust which is not in tandem
with alignment with this universe.
If you say: "I want happiness.",
this universe knows every single necessary condition
to bring you to that space.
Now, happiness to most of you
does not look like:
“I am poor” or “I am alone”,
it looks like abundance
and a multitude of people which you get along with.
When you make happiness your goal,
you are not limiting the universe as to how to bring that to you,
and it will bring it to you in a way that satisﬁes
all kinds of things in your life
which you are looking at now and calling happiness.
To say, “All I really want in this life is to be happy”,
sounds like a common-sense answer,
but as a life goal it sort of sounds like it is destined for failure.
But I'm here to tell you today, that this goal is the goal
which will enable all necessary conditions
of your life to fall into place.
This goal is the holy grail.
So, try this next time you're doing your visualizations
for what it is you do want,
instead of visualizing how those things will come to you,
visualizing yourself in a that big house with tons and tons of money,
visualizing what it would feel like to have
people accept you the way you are.
I want you to visualize what It would feel like
for you to be really happy.
If this means remembering a time when you were,
then do that.
Put yourself in the feeling space of being really really happy,
and see how the universe knocks itself out
to deliver those things to you.
Over the years, many spiritual traditions have made an enemy of desire.
If you look at these particular spiritual traditions,
they were formed in countries where there was a caste system.
They were formed in countries where
when you were born into speciﬁc circumstances,
there is no way to change your stars.
And when that kind of a collective cultural belief begins to percolate,
it becomes ten times easier to make an enemy of desire
or to try to tell yourself that what you want is to not want
than it is to line up with what you want.
The reason is because you are convinced that you can't have
what you want.
Which is not the nature of this universe.
We do not need to make an enemy of desire.
Desire in itself is not what is causing you to suffer.
What is causing you to suffer is the fact that you
don't think you can have what you want.
What is causing you to suffer, is that you don't think
that you can live a satisﬁed life, when the line of what you want
keeps moving and moving and moving.
Because it is true,
when it comes to desire, there will always be more to desire.
There is two ways of closing the gap between
where you are and where you want to be.
Step 1 is:
"I understand that the minute, that I want something, it is."
"And the minute I line up with that
and start thinking myself into alignment with that,
it must manifest in the physical reality.”
That gap is impossible to close the way I have described it,
if you think that you can't have what you want.
Step 2: The other way to close the gap is:
“I want the Now”.
The minute you want the “now”,
the gap closes and your higher-self joins you where you are.
So, the best way to play life, is to do both of these things.
But, I'm here to tell you today that you cannot stop wanting.
It is the design of life itself for you to want,
because wanting is what is causing the expansion of this universe.
And even when you say:
“I want to be rid of desire”,
that is a desire in and of itself.
So, ease up about your wants.
They will cease to torment you,
once it becomes okay that you will always give rise to new desires.
Once it becomes okay that you will line up with them,
once joy becomes about the process of lining up with them,
your desires donʼt need to be your enemy anymore.
You need to ﬁgure out what it is that you want,
and understand that the minute that you want it,
you can line up with it, and you can have it, and it will manifest.
Want is not an enemy!
Want is a super valuable tool to your life.
So, release resistance to it, and go have fun ﬁnding out what it is..
Subtitles by: Tanya Duarte www.tanyaduarte.com