Matt Artisan here, and here are some signs that you might be too much of a "nice guy". Because the
fact is women do like nice, kind, people. But they do not like nice guys. That's confusing. I know, I know...
But hear me out! A nice guy in the dating sense means you manipulate women to get what you want (which is wrong)
Now you might not think that's you but most guys have no idea that they're actually manipulating
women I didn't know but it stems from the fact that you don't believe you're good enough just
the way you are and you see her as above you the first sign is that you're being too agreeable now
being agreeable isn't necessarily a bad quality on its own psychological studies usually describe
someone who's agreeable as someone who craves social harmony which usually goes hand in hand
with a desire to be liked or understood the problem is when agreeable people AKA nice
guys agree with tasks that they don't have the time for or that they don't want to do or they
agree with other people's opinions that they don't even actually believe in they think if they please
others then it'll make make them a better person but unfortunately being too agreeable often does
the opposite and makes people treat you worse the fact is if you're too eager to agree or validate
everything a woman says or does just to please her in order for her to like you she's going to
lose respect for you for not having a backbone and not having any opinions of your own or the ability
to say no to her no this leads to you becoming a pushover you too coward I'm too coward for that I
am women are not attracted to pushovers dude next is being wowed by everything she says so she tells
you she's a pet mortician and you say wow that's so cool you get to see dead kitties and puppies
all day long wow amazing please guys never do that what you're doing there is putting her
on an unnecessary pedestal or maybe you ask her something about her and she says she just likes to
watch TV and hang out with friends a very common answer in Asia by the way and then you basically
say wow you're so cool oh my gosh amazing basically it just comes off as fake and very
disingenuous and at some level it shows her that you don't have any standards now this doesn't mean
you shouldn't compliment women or be interested in what they do absolutely you should but there's no
need to be overly impressed by it because you're interesting too you have all these awesome cool
qualities about you and men with worth and value who have something going on in their lives aren't
going to have low standards for women or people in general they're going to challenge them if
somebody says all they like to do is watch TV and Netflix and chill and that's it I would personally
challenge I'd be like come on there's got to be more to you than just watching TV there's a
whole world out there what do you love to do what really inspires you or at least what do you want
to do like what are you all about like what are you passionate about traveling okay I'm learning
you're winning when you challenge people it's actually holding them up to a higher level it's
expecting more from people instead of settling for less and being wowed by mediocrity next is
not taking enough initiative if you're waiting for a woman to take the lead to ask you out to ask
for you your phone number or tell you where she wants you to take her me no no it's not happening
or you're just willing to take her anywhere that she wants to go despite you not really wanting
to go there you might be too much of a nice guy for example if you're waiting for some big signs
for her to show you that it's time to escalate things to the next level I.E kiss her or make a
move on her and you're waiting forever thinking like oh I'm gonna be respectful I'm gonna be a
hundred percent sure before I make a move on her she's probably gonna lose interest in you I get
it you don't want to make a move and create an awkward scenario but the fact that you're
willing to take a chance shows boldness it shows that you're an action taker it shows that you go
for what you want and that you don't hide your intentions or your attraction towards her which
are all very attractive things nice guys tend to do the opposite maybe you ask for permission
you say can I hold your hand or is it cool if I kiss you now can I lightly brush my leg against
yours to create some sexual tension now of course consent is key when initiating intimacy but that
doesn't mean you have to be weak about it you can still let her know know that you're gonna
make a move on her like going in for a kiss without being like um I would like to kiss you
is it okay just slowly make a move tell her what you want to do don't ask permission just either
slowly do it giving her enough time to react and turn away or you know take a step back if she's
not wanting to reciprocate or just tell her you want to do it I probably shouldn't do this but
[ __ ] it look man when you're not taking charge and not being true to yourself and at least trying
to do what you want to do it either when you finally do make a move comes off really weak or if
you don't make a move at all it's showing her that you don't take charge and most feminine women want
a guy that leads that takes charge that is bold that's not afraid to initiate it's either that or
you get stuck in the friend zone you decide next is doing huge favors for her when the relationship
hasn't even warranted that yet now you might think what's wrong with doing a favor for a girl I'm not
trying to be a jerk now remember there's nothing wrong with being kind and helping somebody out
but if you just met her last week and you're doing this huge gesture will you marry me only so that
she will like you more it's not gonna have that effect don't watch her dog for a week don't fix
her Plumbing you just met her go on a date with her she can hire a dog sitter or a plumber she's
just taking advantage of your niceness I'm helping save all those things for someone you're are in a
relationship with if you do too much for her too soon it lowers her value in your mind even though
you think you're giving all this value to her you're doing all these things for her it actually
makes her subtly feel like you're beneath her like you'll just do anything for her again like
I said before like you have no standards it also seems like you have nothing going on in your life
if you're constantly trying to do favors for her plus women can tell when it seems like you have an
ulterior motive behind your good deeds she knows that she doesn't know you well enough for you to
edit her term paper but yet you do it anyway it shows her that you might be expecting something
in return if you know what I mean then in your quest to be good and Noble you end up losing all
Chances with her you lose so focus on yourself and your own life and save those favors until you know
she deserves them next is letting her treat you like crap she always comes late for the date or
she flakes on you she makes snide comments about you to other people or she's constantly venting
to you she doesn't respect you and somehow you're still tolerating all these things from
holy [ __ ] you've made the biggest nice guy mistake ever you might say oh she's emotional or
she's bipolar or whatever but stop making excuses for her she knows exactly what she's doing when
she does it she knows it's not okay to treat somebody like that but you made it permissible
because you don't expect to get anything better deep down nice guy syndrome is really a feeling
of inadequacy that you're not good enough so you have to prove how good you are and what typically
happens in these kind of situations is a nice guy builds up a bunch of hurt and unprocessed
anger inside you which can build up and come out in a fit of rage or debilitating depression but
you don't need to be rude or aggressive you just need to stand up for yourself and start
communicating clearly and directly what your boundaries are and what you want and what you
don't want what's acceptable and unacceptable she'll likely understand and adjust her behavior
but even if she doesn't and she insists that she's not at fault she'll definitely respect
you for finally growing doing a backbone and calling her out on her [ __ ] and look
man the nice guy syndrome can also show itself as neediness this feeling like you need her to
feel validated to feel good enough it's super deep rooted you might feel like that's just the
way you are because that's the way you've always been but you don't have to go on living This Way
full of Shame and doubt and insecurities because that's exactly what our coaching program is all
about it's designed to help you let go of all the emotional baggage limiting beliefs and emotional
and mental roadblocks such as Nice Guy syndrome that are holding you back and builds you up as
this powerful confident attractive man the best most attractive version of yourself the man that
you're meant to be so to see if we could help you out click the link down in the description
or to the right of this screen in just a second hop on a call with one of our coaches and we'll
show you how our coaching program can help you become the best most attractive version
of yourself so that you can start getting more dates with women that you're actually
excited about my name is Matt Artisan from The Attractive Man, and I'll see you in the next video