Hey everybody! Happy Wednesday!
And I feel the urge, because of all the commercials to say what day is it? It's hump day!
So when it's hump day, I'm on the website katimorton.com and I'm also on Youtube
so if you asked your question below yesterday's video or you hopped on katimorton.com,
asked your questions there, I'm answering them.
And I have three today, as well as a journal topic.
Oh poop, and I forgot to write who it was from. It was on the website, but anyway thanks for sending that out.
You'll know that it's you when I read it.
First question says "Hey Kati. Does being a therapist ever get exhausting?
I can only imagine hearing such negative things every day can wear on you personally.
Do you ever regret going into this field or do you find that it is truly worth it at the end of the day?
Thanks. Love you."
Now I wanted to answer this, because I get a lot of questions about it.
I get a lot of questions in general about how you can become a therapist,
so I think it's important for those of you who are looking into the therapy field or
thinking about being a counselor or therapist, psychologist, what have you
That you're aware of how it can feel and to make the decision if it's the right thing for you.
Now just to preface how I decided to continue on in my education and actually become a therapist
is when I finished with school I worked at this place in downtown Los Angeles called Saint Anne's
And it's a home for foster teen girls who are pregnant or parenting, and I was a counselor there.
Because when you don't have your masters you can't be a therapist. You're just a counselor.
And I did that for about a year to decide if I thought I could keep doing it, if it was exhausting.
And you know, what I thought about it.
And it is exhausting. That was particularly exhausting, and the burnout rate was really high there
because they worked us long hours and everything like that.
We didn't get any breaks, because we ate with the clients and stuff like that,
so I'd encourage any of you if you're thinking of doing it
before you commit and go into your master's and gather your hours and take your licensing exam,
that you try it out for a bit. See how it feels.
See if you like it. See if you feel worn out or if it's too much for you, because I find that everybody's very different.
Now for me, I don't actually find it exhausting.
I don't know why, but I don't.
I also put a lot of energy into self care for myself.
I'm fighting a cold right now and I have this weird congestion, so I have been binge watching Blacklist
with Sean. We've just been lounging at night.
You know just cooking at home together, and I've just been relaxing.
And I've been spending some time with my friends, catching up because I'm back in town.
And so I enjoy yoga and meditation.
I know many of you who have been long time followers know that I mention that periodically.
That's something that I do a lot of to take care of myself,
and if you plan on going into a field of any sort, nursing, therapy, a physician,
any kind of field where all your energy is put into other people and helping them get well or whatever
make sure you put a lot of energy into your self care.
You take care of yourself.
Like I've told you over and over, I am in therapy personally.
And I think that as a therapist, that's something that should be required of us.
It was when I was in school, in one of my practicums required it,
so I think it's something we should all do.
So that's my answer. I know it's really long answer to a short question, but it can be exhausting.
Take care of yourself. I personally don't find it exhausting.
And it can be ridiculously wonderfully, so excited and rewarding.
When I run into clients who I haven't seen for years, and they email me
or hear they just got married or they send me pictures of their baby
or something that they're doing.
They move, they went to school. It can be anything number of things.
I get so excited, and that makes it all worth it.
So yea, take care of yourself and then you can reap the rewards of helping others as you watch them grow.
It can be really wonderful work.
Question number two:
"Do therapists actually care about their clients or do they just care and listen, because they're paid to?"
Now I know these are kind of similar about being a therapist and therapy,
but a lot of you have a lot of questions about this and it got a lot of thumbs up,
so I'm just answering what you want me to answer.
So ... okay, now I did a video recently for Laura Lejeune. I think her channel is called lauracanfly or maybe it's called Laura Lejuene?
I'm not sure, but I've been following her forever. It's not like I subscribe every day, it just comes up in my feed and I watch her.
And I did a video for her where I talked about the misconceptions of therapy,
and the main one that I really want to talk about is that all therapists are not created equal.
There can be real assholes out there, just like every profession.
There are amazing people, amazing gardeners who know a lot about plants and ecosystems, what to create
and what bugs they should introduce to the area. I don't even know about that.
But there are people that are great at that.
And there are people who just know how to cut grass, like me.
But I can potentially keep up a lawn, right.
So what I'm saying is there people who invest in their career and invest in the people that see them
and only take a number of clients that they can maintain and put enough time and effort into.
That's what I do. I maintain a certain amount of clients in my private practice,
so that I feel like I can still put in time and effort in between sessions with them
so that I'm prepared and I've been working on stuff and have new ideas for them.
We're always trying something new. We're always working towards new things.
So I really care a lot about my clients. It's not about the money for me.
If it was about the ... trust me I don't make that much money.
Therapists don't make that much money.
So, sorry an ambulance just went by.
So, I care deeply. I care a lot about you guys.
I wouldn't put in all this effort if I didn't care, because I don't really get paid much off this either.
Ads on YouTube aren't paying a ton. It's not like I make a lot of money.
It's because I really, I know it's hard out there.
I know life's hard, and if I can put a dent in any little person's hurt to make it a little less
then I think that that's a good thing.
And I think that we should all think that way with what we do. It doesn't have to be mental health.
It could be anything, and every day every way we're affecting other people's lives.
And so, I care about people as a whole.
So yea, I actually care, but that doesn't mean that all of them do.
I've had clients who had horrible experiences with therapists 'cause they're assholes.
You know you can file complaints online to the licensing board if you feel that it was wrong and you were wronged.
That's your right as a customer.
But yea I care a lot, and I think you should find a therapist that you feel cares about you as well.
Question number three: Now this is a good one, and I hadn't thought about this one either.
It says, "How can I stop having nightmares, so that I can actually get some sleep?"
We all know how important sleep is.
"I'm absolutely drained throughout the day, because I'm not able to get a peaceful sleep.
I wake up freaking out, panicking, and I spend most of my day convincing myself that it was just a dream.
Even though some of my incidents in my dreams actually had happened in my life.
I already take Paxil for anxiety and depression. Is there anything that I can do?"
Now, I do not specialize in sleep and helping with sleep,
however almost every one of my clients who struggle with anxiety or depression has troubles with sleep
or has had troubles with sleep.
Until you've worked through what you're working through with your therapist or if you're on medication that helps with sleep.
Those are the two things I see the most common.
However, I did a little research today, so it's very interesting.
You can look it up, and it's something that I actually talked about loosely. I did not know it was called this.
Which is kind of cool that it actually is a process, but in my video, if you want to search Kati Morton + how to sleep
or get to sleep. I have a video, there's like a little lamb on the thumbnail, and I'm like sleeeep.
And so you can watch that, because I talk about more tools than just this one,
but this apparently is like 70 to 80% effective.
And those are amazing percentages, so it's called IRT.
And it was created by Krakow and Harris apparently.
It's a 3 step process, and they say that you only need to do these things for a few minutes each day
and you may only need to do it for a week or two which is fricken' amazing.
Let me just read you the 3 steps of this, and if you want more information you can search online and look into it,
but it sounds, it's pretty much, well IRT stands for ... I'll look it up really quick, sorry guys I forgot to write that down
and it's on another page that I have pulled up
IRT is the only one that they know works, and it's called Imagery Rehersal Therapy.
So it's like we're going to, and these are the 3 steps
it makes sense when I say Imagery Rehersal Therapy.
We're gonna jot down, like someone on the website had commented and said I keep a dream journal,
because it really helps me to read it out and see it on paper and be like that's ridiculous.
Or that's not real life, that was a dream, I wrote it down.
And so this says "jot down a brief description of a recent nightmare.
If your most recent nightmare is too upsetting to think about pick another one."
Now the second step, that's just step one: keep a dream journal.
Step two: "think of a way to change that nightmare."
Now Karkow, the guy who created it, declines to tell his patients which sort of change to make and
encourages them to rely on their intuition to make appropriate change.
So you're pretty much trying to make it not a nightmare.
So how can you change the nightmare to not a nightmare? So you think about that.
And number three: "set aside a few minutes each day to imagine this altered version of the nightmare.
Simply paint a mental picture of this altered version."
And it says "some people's chronic nightmares, especially those who have suffered it for years find
it hard to believe that it's that simple. But it really is."
And it can be completely effective for you.
Obviously 70 or 80% doesn't mean 100% of people are gonna get relief,
but I thought that was pretty fricken' cool
because sometimes we can feel so lost and like things are just helpless,
but in three steps, if we do a little bit each day, reimagine the different nightmare with a better outcome
and we can overcome our nightmares.
So let me know if that helps you, because that's something that I will put in my rolodex for when I'm with my clients
and I will offer that up as some helpful tips for them to move past it.
Now the journal topic is a quote,
It says "Those who don't understand your silence will never understand your words." - Elbert Hubbard
And this person, I'm sorry I didn't write down your name sweetie, uh frustrating
"In recovery I have found that one of the most difficult things was to repair broken relationships.
After months and months I realized even the people who love us the most have a difficult time
undestanding the things we struggle with and the isolation that results from those things,
but the best thing I've been able to accept was that it's okay if they don't understand.
And in time maybe they will. It is not our fault, and it doesn't mean we screwed up.
It just means that healing takes time. And our loved ones process our illness at their own pace.
Let's breathe and keep working hard. The rest will fall into place."
So I really like that. What does that quote I mentioned in the beginning mean to you?
And what do you think about what that person said?
I love you all. I'll see you tomorrow on Twitter, so ask your questions there. Use the hashtag #KatiFAQ Bye!