- What happens when tomfoolery reaches maximum speed?
- Let's talk about that.
(cheerful music)
Good Mythical Morning.
- Today we're feeding our need for speed and chaos
with a series of bizarre fast-paced challenges.
- Yeah, and speaking of fast,
today's episode is sponsored by Frontier.
Frontier's 100% fiber-optic internet
is as powerful as your creativity.
With the speed of Frontier Fiber 2 Gig,
you can be unstoppable.
- I love hearing the words "speed" and "unstoppable"
when it comes to my internet.
- Yeah. I also love the word "fiber."
- Oh.
- In all senses of the word.
- Agreed.
Frontier's mission is building gigabit America,
they believe that faster internet and better technology
is for everyone.
That means an inclusive digital society
build on 100% fiber-optic infrastructure for everyone.
- And Frontier's 2-gig fiber-optic internet
has upload and download speeds
of up to two gigabits per second.
That is ridiculously quick,
that's 25 to 75 times faster upload speeds than cable.
- With that kind of bandwidth,
you can download a 10 gigabyte file in less than a minute,
and share pictures and videos as fast as you stream,
on multiple devices at the same time,
most of the time you won't even be able to come
anywhere close to maxing out your connection.
- Let's see just how fast and far we can go,
Let's Go Frontiering!
Visit Frontier on YouTube and at Frontier.com.
- Now let's test our own speed.
- Now, I mean you know that I am not known for my speed.
- That's true.
- I mean, I'm not letting you make that point,
I'm just gonna make that myself.
You remember how slow I was on the soccer field.
- Yeah, you were easy to spot and follow.
But I seen you clean up some spills pretty fast.
- I am a speed cleaner.
And if there are punishments involved
in what we're about to do,
and I think that there are,
then that might get my giddy-up to go.
- Oh, there are.
It's time for,
"What Have I Witnessed? That Was So Fast!
I've Never Seen a Potato Get So Speedily Mashed!"
- In the name of all things high speed,
in each round, we're gonna be presented with a unique task,
one that we've never done before.
And I'm told that mashing potatoes
is actually not one of them.
- That was just in the title. - That was just in the title.
Don't get my hopes up about mashing taters, y'all!
We have never done these tasks,
let alone under any kind of fast-paced timing conditions.
- Right, and whoever finishes the task first wins the round,
and the loser of each round
must endure a super quick punishment.
Our final round will take place somewhere special,
let's just say we're entering a new frontier.
- Mm-hm. Let's do it.
(upbeat music)
- Let's say hello to our speed talking moderator,
Fast-Talking Franny.
- Hello, I'm Fast-Talking Franny,
and I'm played by a lady who has never been called fast
a day in her life.
(Rhett wheezes)
- She was bladed by a lady? - I don't know what she said.
- [Franny] I said I was played by a lady.
- [Link] You're talking fast. - You heard what I said.
(Rhett laughs)
- Okay, Fast-Talking Franny.
- Yep, that's my name.
- [Rhett] What's our first challenge?
- Oh, boy, well let's see what you got here.
Okay.
Well, your first challenge
is you better get your tongues ready
'cause you're gonna lick all of the ice cream
out of this cone.
All of it's gotta be gone,
from the inside of the cone, the top of the cone,
everywhere on that cone, you better get it off,
but if I see any biting, it's wrong.
Do not use your teeth.
- Okay. - No teeth?
- No teeth. All right, you understand what you gotta do?
- [Rhett] Yeah.
- All right.
- Just the ice cream, not the cone.
- Yeah, you heard what I said.
All right, one, two, three, go!
- Oh!
- Oh. You gotta lick it off the table, now.
Get it back in the cone, all right, now he's got it.
Now he's gotta get the rest of that on that table, though.
Oh, now it's on the floor. This is a mess.
Oh, boy.
Looking like Link's got a good lead, here.
Oh, no.
(crew laughs)
- What the heck?
- Get it out of that hole. Get it out of the hole.
Oh, boy.
Just 'cause the cone fell apart,
does not mean it's not still a cone.
- I'm trying not to use my lips, that's the hard part.
(crew laughs)
- [Franny] Judges?
- Hold up, what?
Where's the rest of your cone?
- Well, it's on the table.
Judges?
- I haven't touched it to my lips, look at that.
- I can't see the judges.
Well, I guess...
It's gonna go to Link here.
I think he got the whole thing down his gullet.
- Oh, gosh, that's cold, woo, it's right here right now.
It's moving down.
It's moving down, it's right here.
I mean, ooh, my stomach's cold.
- Rhett, you might not wanna be eating anymore,
because you got some stuff to put in your mouth,
'cause you lost.
- I wanted to get the satisfaction of eating this.
Okay, what's my punishment?
- Well, since Link won, and you lost,
you're gonna have to get your mouth ready
and squeeze some hot dog water from a sponge
into your mouth,
until there is no more juice left in that sponge.
(Link chuckles)
- You gotta squeeze all of the hot dog water juice.
Oh, man, that was a good-tasting cone of ice cream.
I'd like to go back to- - I don't feel like
I tasted it.
- All right.
One, two, three,
sponge it.
(crew chuckles)
Franny can't watch this.
(crew chuckles)
- There's a lot in there.
- Oh, no.
- Oh my gosh!
That's a lot of hot dog water.
- It's awful!
(crew laughs)
I mean, you know what it tastes like?
Hot dog water! - Hot dog?
- That's foul.
- You're not even squeezing it hard yet.
I'm a fast super licker.
(Rhett groans)
Let the record show.
- Okay. - You all right?
- Yeah, that's all.
- I don't understand
what anybody's saying today. - Well, I guess we gotta
keep on moving on,
are we going to the next round now?
Great job on that, squeezing and your licking.
(upbeat music)
- Okay. - Well, we have corn.
- What are we gonna do with this corn?
- Oh, boy, that last round was very hard to watch.
You're gonna take that brush
and gonna brush off all those corn kernels from that corn,
but you better not,
you better wait wait wait wait wait,
because you gotta put those oven mitts on
before you do all that.
Put the oven mitts on, put the brush,
and you get the corn kernels off right now.
- I don't know if she's actually talking fast,
as much as she's just kinda talking-
What?
- Oh, god. Oh.
- Now we just-
- [Franny] Lot of talking, not a lot of doing.
- This feels inappropriate.
- [Franny] Watch out, those plates are glass.
- This is not working! At all!
How are you even...? - [Franny] I don't know,
but it's not good for you.
(plates rattle)
- I'm not getting anything!
(pants)
- Y'all gonna have a lot of corn in your cups.
- Okay, I'm about done, just a little bit more,
and then...
Okay.
- I mean... - [Franny] Show it to me,
show it to me!
- I feel like I've given up early,
just because...
This is how you make creamed corn.
- Is that a forfeit?
- [Link] I guess.
No, I ain't gonna forfeit!
- Oh, never mind.
- Okay, there you go.
- Oh! Eh! We got a winner.
- I mean, no, there's some right there.
- Oh, no.
We gotta go back. (crew laughs)
Don't be a cheater, now.
I can't really see
'cause those big old mittens are covering up
a lot of (verbally stumbles).
(crew laughs)
- [Rhett] Okay.
- She kinda talks in a normal voice
and then goes "Blehlehlehleh" sometimes.
- All right, he did it.
- All right, dude,
there was no way. - I got corn all over myself!
- There was no way I was gonna get that.
- I got corn in my eye!
(Franny laughs)
- [Link] Yeah, I know, it's on my glasses.
- Oh, gosh.
- Punish me!
- Rhett won that round, and so Link-
- I know he won it!
- All right, but I gotta say it for the people at home.
Rhett won that round, and now Link,
you gotta stand up, do a little robot dance,
and say the Pledge of Allegiance.
As fast as you can, real fast, fast fast fast fast fast.
- As fast as you can.
- [Franny] Do the robot fast,
too! - I pledge allegiance
to the flag of the
United States of America. - That's not a fast robot!
- And to the republic for which it stands,
one nation under God,
indivisible...
- That'll do it.
- What about the republic and for which it stands?
- And to the republic for which it stands,
one nation, under God, indivisible...
- Oh, he prays, the robot prays.
(crew laughs)
- Man.
Hey, I made it a song as a bonus.
- You didn't finish it.
- One nation, under God, indivisible...
- What's the best part?
- With liberty and justice for all.
- Ah, zippity, I like that, zippity doo dah.
- Man.
- [Franny] Very nice.
- Who knew there were so many parts
to that allegiance thing? - Yeah.
(upbeat music)
- I don't have a hammer anymore, so.
All right, we're gonna do this next challenge,
it's gonna be real fast, so buckle up,
and then it's gonna be red, orange-
- [Link] What is this, oil?
- [Franny] This is baby oil in there,
it's gonna be real slippery, slippery slippery.
- Light to dark?
- Light to dark, but also Roy G. Biv,
so that's a red, that's a orange, yellow, green, blue-
- [Link] Yeah, rainbow, the rainbow.
- The rainbow, you get it.
All right!
You got my, oh, thank you so much, Lucas.
All right, one, two, three, go!
- Oh, oh. - Oh...
- 'Kay, there's the red, there's the orange.
Oh, gosh.
What...?
Red, orange, yellow.
- Oh... - Green.
- Shoot, oh my goodness, man.
Roy G.
- Green, green green, green.
Blue, blue blue, blue.
Blue, blue blue, blue,
blue blue blue blue blue!
Blue, indigo,
violet.
- I like to talk to myself, too.
- Brown? Where's brown in the rainbow?
- Oh, boy, that's a toughie.
- Oh my god.
- Okay.
Alright, and, I am...
Done!
- Oh, I gotta take a little look here.
Nope, nope, nope, nope!
- Nope nope nope?
This one, this one?
- [Franny] Well- - Done!
- Red, orange, yellow...
- Mm. Definitely not. - [Rhett] Dark to light.
- Can I keep going?
- I'm gonna go with Link over here.
You put the white one all the way on the end of the darks.
- Yeah, because it's, no, and then the lights!
His is on the end of the reds.
- No, these are real light.
You see how these are light?
- Why is your rainbow starting with blue?
- [Rhett] Roy G Biv.
- [Franny] But then the white is the brightest one.
- Why did you put the brown over here,
and your...?
- 'Cause it's closer to red.
It goes to black.
- Although I do think that is very pretty,
it is incorrect. - I did what you did!
Except I started,
it repeats itself, so I did it on a different side.
I went from brown to red, then to yellow.
- [Link] He went a wrong way.
- [Franny] Yep, he sure did.
- Well here's the reason why he got it wrong,
'cause he put blue,
he did not put blue between green and purple.
- Uh-oh.
- [Rhett] Oh, that's true. That's true.
- So, that's wrong, dude.
- Also, I'm the one who tells you it's wrong and right,
so it's my opinion only.
All right, Rhett, you gotta do this thing,
it's gonna be with your lubey hands,
you're gonna put 'em in this mac and cheese.
You gotta do it for 15 seconds
while you say the word "moist"
over and over again real fast.
- Oh, no.
- [Franny] So get those hands all up in that mac and cheese.
- This is a punishment for everybody.
- This is a punishment?
- For everybody. - [Franny] Yes it is.
Just put 'em in there, you can move 'em around if you want,
you don't have to.
- [Rhett] Moist.
- [Franny] Fast!
- Moist, moist moist moist moist moist
moist moist moist moist moist moist
moist moist moist- - Oh, yeah, that's good.
- Burger. Burger. - Moist moist moist moist
moist moist moist moist moist- - Burger.
- Moist moist moist moist moist
moist moist moist. - All right, that's good.
- Oh. I'm sorry.
(crew laughs)
(upbeat music)
All right, this last round's different
because we've got a remote connection
to a couple of Mythical Crewmembers,
Trevor and Davin are over at
the Frontier GigaSpace in Venice,
overlooking Venice Beach,
and they're the ones
competing in this final high speed challenge.
What's up, guys?
- What's up, guys? - Hello, we are here,
and we don't know why.
- You will know, because we will tell you shortly.
Frontier's GigaSpace creator house is made for creators
to do what they do best,
and that is...
- Create!
- Yes, and in this case, that means that
you, Trevor and Davin,
are gonna be creating, I think embarrassment.
- [Rhett] Yeah, hopefully.
- For yourselves, at high speed.
And because the GigaSpace is decked out
with Frontier's 2-gig fiber internet,
we're gonna be cheering 'em on in real time,
or we may be heckling them.
- Oh, I will.
- All thanks to the seamless video connection
provided by Frontier, our sponsor.
- Guys, we have hidden a very special prize
somewhere in the GigaSpace.
- Oh, okay. - All right.
- But only one of you can get it, all right?
You ready for your challenge?
- Yes. - Bring it on.
- You seem confident, but the way you're dressed
kinda undermines it.
- Yeah.
- What?
- You were giving us matching shorts, we don't know why.
- You see that pile of tights in between you?
- Uh-huh.
- This is part of it?
This is just not set dec?
- No, it's not just set dec,
this is more than a decoration.
It's a challenge for you.
Whoever can put on the most pairs of tights in 60 seconds
will win.
- Without ripping 'em.
You can't rip 'em, if you rip it it doesn't count.
- You mean these tiny tights?
Over our legs?
- They stretch.
Okay, you ready?
- I'm gonna destroy him, yeah, let's go.
- 60 seconds.
Three, two, one,
go! - Go!
- Okay, I'm gonna be counting Davin.
- Oh, I already ripped one.
That doesn't count.
- I'll be watching Trevor.
- Oh, he ripped one and he had to give up.
- That doesn't count, Davin, you gotta start over.
- Trevor, if you rip one, you gotta say it, okay?
- Yeah, I didn't rip it, Davin!
- Well I ripped mine.
- [Link] 45 seconds in.
Or 15 seconds in. - How do you not rip 'em?
I heard a rip, I heard a rip!
- I didn't rip, no, there's no rip.
- Looking great, Trevor.
- I'm just goated.
- How do you even, what is going on, Trevor?
- I'm good at this, Davin. - Davin hasn't got one on yet.
- You think this is my first time putting on tights?
- It is my first time!
- It's not mine, buddy.
Freaking heck.
- Trevor's definitely been practicing.
- Trevor's got a very good technique.
You've only got 15 seconds left.
- 15 seconds?
- What are you, you're not even pulling them on!
- Davin has half a pair.
Nine, eight,
seven, six,
five, four,
three, two,
one.
- [Rhett] Okay...
I don't know how I feel about what happened on Davin's side.
He went for the upper body.
- But Trevor, you look great, man.
- Thank you.
- No, don't do that.
Don't do that!
- What?
- Put your leg down.
All right, so your prize is waiting in that closet
right over there.
- The closet?
(crew laughs)
- This just seems strange. - What?
- It's a chicken dinner, get it?
- Oh, winner, chicken dinner. - Winner winner,
chicken dinner.
- You hid chicken here?
We could've just got chicken in Burbank!
- That's true.
- But that's Westside chicken.
- Uh-huh.
- Fancy chicken.
- All right, thanks again to Frontier
for sponsoring today's episode.
- Let's see just how fast and far we can go,
Let's Go Frontiering.
Visit Frontier on YouTube and at Frontier.com.
- And thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell.
- You know what time it is.
- Hi, my name is Eric Johnson.
Graduating Rider University summa cum laude.
And it's time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
- Congratulations.
Click the top link to watch us guess
what the GMM crew is saying at high speed
in Good Mythical More.
- And to find out where
the Wheel of Mythicality's gonna land.
Make your voice heard by filling out the census
at MythicalCensus.com,
and you'll earn a special discount at the store!