I'M FORREST MACNEIL, AND AS ALWAYS,
I WILL REVIEW ANY EXPERIENCE YOU WANT ME TO,
NO MATTER WHAT IT IS.
- YOU READY, FORREST? - YES, I AM.
- OKAY.
THIS COMES FROM NICK IN SYOSSET, NEW YORK.
- AHA.
- HEY, FORREST.
SO, ON THE BACK OF THIS BOX OF PANCAKE MIX,
THEY TELL YOU HOW TO MAKE 15 PANCAKES,
BUT IT DOESN'T TELL YOU HOW TO MAKE ANY FEWER THAN THAT.
SO HERE'S THE THING-- I LIVE ALONE.
DO THEY EXPECT ME TO EAT 15 PANCAKES?
WHAT'S IT LIKE TO EAT 15 PANCAKES?
- NO. REALLY?
THAT'S THE, UH--
THAT'S THE PROFOUND LIFE EXPERIENCE
HE WANTS TO KNOW ABOUT-- EATING 15 PANCAKES?
- THAT'S HIS REQUEST, SO...
- YES, THAT IS... [clears throat]
THE REQUEST THAT HAS BEEN MADE.
OKAY, NICK,
I'M GOING TO COVER YOUR REQUEST IN BUTTER AND SYRUP
AND DIG IN TO TRY TO FIND SOME IMPORTANT MEANING
IN A GIANT, STEAMING PILE OF FLAPJACKS.
EATING 15 PANCAKES.
- YUM. - AHH.
THOUGH THIS TASK WAS CLEARLY MORE SUITED
TO A FRATERNITY BROTHER WHO HAD LOST A BET
THAN TO A LIFE REVIEWER,
I PREPARED MY STOMACH AND MY NERVES
FOR A VERY LARGE BREAKFAST.
THE WORLD RECORD FOR PANCAKES EATEN
IN ONE SITTING IS 73 PANCAKES.
THAT IS HELD BY A RUSSIAN MAN
WHOSE LIFE MUST BE AN UNENDURABLE HELLSCAPE
OF EXCRUCIATING SADNESS.
PERSONALLY, I DOUBT I'VE EVER HAD
MORE THAN TWO PANCAKES IN A MONTH.
- OKAY, FIVE TALL STACKS OF PANCAKES.
- YES.
- THEY SAY BACK IN THE KITCHEN IF YOU CAN FINISH IT ALL,
WE'LL PUT YOUR PICTURE UP ON THE WALL.
- MM, NO, I DON'T THINK SO, BUT THANK YOU.
MAY I HAVE AN ENORMOUS AMOUNT OF WATER, PLEASE?
- YOU GOT IT. - ALL RIGHT, GOOD.
THIS CERTAINLY IS AN UPSETTING NUMBER OF PANCAKES.
HERE WE GO.
[dramatic music]
♪
THEY'RE TASTY...
FOR NOW.
♪
THREE PANCAKES IN, AND I ALREADY FEEL
THAT I HAVE GREATLY OVERINDULGED.
I AM FULL OF PANCAKES.
ANY RATIONAL PERSON FEELING THE WAY I DO NOW
WOULD DEFINITELY STOP.
[chuckles]
♪
THERE'S A VERY LOUD THRUMMING IN MY EARS.
THE BLOOD FEELS VERY SLOW.
OH, GOD.
I HAVE NOW EATEN TEN PANCAKES,
AND ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, I CAN SEE THE LIGHT
AT THE END OF THIS DISGUSTING TUNNEL, BUT...
IT HAS NOW BEEN 45 MINUTES
SINCE I STARTED EATING,
AND THE PANCAKES ARE NO LONGER HOT.
THESE AREN'T FOOD.
- YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE, BABY.
- WITH 1 1/2 PANCAKES TO GO, I HAD HIT A WALL.
MY PRODUCER, GRANT, MADE THE UNPRECEDENTED MOVE
OF STEPPING OUT FROM BEHIND THE CAMERAS
TO PROVIDE MUCH-NEEDED MORAL SUPPORT.
- HEY, YOU KNOW YOU GOT TO FINISH THESE PANCAKES, RIGHT?
- YEAH.
- YOU DO, MAN. - MM.
- THIS IS YOUR SHOW. DON'T BAIL ON IT.
- GO AWAY, PLEASE.
- I'M JUST DOING WHAT YOU TOLD ME TO DO.
I'M NOT GOING TO LET YOU BACK DOWN.
REMEMBER?
"EVEN IF I BEG TO STOP, DON'T LET ME."
THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID.
- THIS ONE IS REALLY STUPID.
- DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU TOLD ME
ABOUT THE GUY WHO SPENT ALL HIS TIME
GROWING FUNGUS ON A STICK?
AND EVERYBODY TOLD HIM TO KNOCK IT OFF,
AND HE WAS GONNA,
UNTIL IT TURNED OUT TO BE PENICILLIN.
- MM-HMM.
- THIS COULD BE YOUR PENICILLIN, FORREST.
- [sighs]
[suspenseful music]
♪
[laughter, cheers, and applause]
- YOU DID IT. YOU DID IT!
[laughing]
OKAY, I'LL TAKE THIS WHEN YOU'RE READY.
- AS I LEFT THE RESTAURANT,
I SCANNED MY SOUL FOR SOME GREATER WISDOM
TO SHARE WITH HUMANITY.
[heaving]
[spits] UGH.
[groaning softly]
YEAH, THERE'S NOT REALLY
A WHOLE LOT MORE TO SAY ABOUT THAT.
IT WAS EXTREMELY UNPLEASANT AND SHOULD BE AVOIDED
AT ALL COSTS.
EATING 15 PANCAKES-- HALF A STAR.