Thanks for being here.
We got to talk a little louder.
Fill the space.
Hi, everybody.
Look at everybody.
It's Sean Hayes, in case you don't know.
That's Sean Hayes.
Uh huh.
You may have not heard of me.
I'm so happy to see you in person.
I'm happy to see you in person too.
How have you been?
I have been fine.
Thank you for asking.
How have you been?
I've been really good.
You know, I'm sad we don't get to kiss like we usually
do the three times.
Maybe we could do elbow three times.
Let's do it.
So we go--
And we do it, and kind of wait.
And that--
And then you do it again.
That.
Then you do it again.
Yeah.
That's how we kiss.
Yep.
That's how we do it.
Do you remember the last time you were, here
in that chair, what you did?
Did I soil it?
What happened?
No.
What happened?
No, well let's just show the clip so you'll remember.
I think Brad is all the way up there.
He should be this close to this much beauty,
so I Sean Karl Hayes am going to give up
my seat next to the world's richest lesbian
to the guy from two episodes of "Growing Pains."
Please, Brad Pitt.
Oh, man.
All right, buddy.
Look at it.
We were just so close to having a real moment there.
Yeah.
Just a little closer and his life would have changed.
Yeah.
By the way, same shirt.
You're wearing the same--
Exact same shirt.
Yeah.
That is not planned.
That's your talk show host--
your talk show shirt.
Sure.
Yeah.
Wait, that was crazy, though, because
right before this moment, I came down the stairs,
and I did this bit where I came at him with my lips pursed
and my arms open like I was going to kiss him.
He was like,-- who's this idiot?
There's no way.
This idiot's got to get away from me.
He got so freaked out about it, and now we live together.
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
Yeah.
Hey, you turned 50 since I saw you.
I did.
Yeah.
How's that?
How do you feel?
You turned 50 since I saw you last too,
it feels like so long ago.
Yeah.
It was OK, but right-- but you get a certain age
and everything starts to fall apart, and like my back--
Right?
You have back problems, right?
Yes, always.
What?
Tell me about that.
No, you got-- you--
you have the story.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You must be exhausted from asking those questions.
So, no, I have a bad back.
I don't know why.
Like, it's a herniated disk or something.
I was just trying to bond with you
about what's your problem too, Ellen, about your back.
But, no I--
No, let me talk then.
So I have--
No, I don't know.
It's like a herniated disk.
And it went down my leg, and then it gets cold,
and you put a blanket just over that side, right?
Because it's like you get a cold sensation or hot sensation?
And I'm doing my exercises now.
And I'm sitting-- according to Jane Fonda, you have to have--
Look at me.
I don't have that.
I have horrible posture.
I'll do that now though.
Do you-- are you like in pain all the time?
No, I'm hardly ever in pain.
OK, well, calm down about it.
I was just trying to bond with you.
Yeah.
I haven't had back pain for a while.
It's random.
It just-- it's usually stress which causes it by the way.
Am I causing you stress?
Yes.
No.
I want to show everybody this picture of this dog
that you have, that is the cutest--
this is a giant dog.
Is it a puppy-- or do-- it's a huge--
Oh, look at him sleeping.
His name is Ricky.
He's a golden doodle.
I had no idea.
He's nine months old, and he's 80 pounds.
He's enormous.
He's a horse.
I rode him here on the 101.
I got clearance and everything.
Yeah, no.
Look at that.
Look at him.
He's gigantic, and he has no concept of how big he is.
No, they don't.
Let's talk about that.
I have no concept about how big I am.
I mean I am fat, so fat, my friend Andrea
and I sing a song.
You know Andrea Martin?
She's so funny.
Yes.
Whenever we're feeling too fat we go, fat, fat,
fanny in fat fat fat.
Fat fat fanny, in a fat, fat fat.
Fat fat fanny in a fat, fat.
Fat, fat, fanny in a fat, fat, fat.
This is great.
Moving on?
Yeah.
So, you brought video.
Oh.
Look how tiny he is there.
Oh my God.
Oh my God, that's a cu--
oh my God, that's cute.
Yeah, by the way, he's so sweet.
And I love that--
well, you and I we both love dogs.
They can do no wrong, but I love him so much.
I did not-- you know, you never know
what you're going to get right when you get a dog.
They could be like independent, like cats, or needy like me.
And so this one's very needy.
Now, you just have the one dog?
You had another dog?
I did.
That didn't work out, but she is in a fantastic place.
Place.
By place, I mean home.
OK.
All right.
So just the one?
You're not going to have a pal?
I do-- I do want--
I do want another one.
Get another one.
Yeah.
Or maybe even three.
Yeah.
Do it.
OK.
Yeah.
Challenge accepted.
You posted a picture of your prom.
I'd like to show it, and then I want
to hear about what that night was for you, because--
Look at that.
That Is Shareen.
She's so sweet.
By the way, I just texted with her today.
She is so-- I'll tell you what didn't happen--
is nobody got any that night.
That's for sure.
But she is super sweet.
I love her.
And so gay that I took the fabric from the--
look how big the pants are.
By the way, you could fit four of me inside those pants,
not since MC Hammer.
But the fabric from the tie matches the pants and the shoes
because I thought that was--
Right.
Everybody called me Ducky from "Pretty in Pink."
Well, I can see that.
Now, at that time, did you realize you were gay?
Or no, you were in denial?
Absolutely.
Oh, you did know.
Absolutely.
And look back, thinking like you know, I pulled everyone--
I pulled the wool over everyone's eyes.
And they're like, not really.
They can come back at you 20 years later,
like no, you were pretty gay.
Yeah.
I was like, what made you say that?
Yeah.
Are you missing "Will & Grace"?
It's been-- how long has it been now?
No.
No, I miss all the people and everybody, but no.
We did that crazy, random, weird thing
where everybody wanted to come back,
so we came back and did it.
And it was done.
And I think it is all good to go.
Such a blast.
I laughed so hard coming back, and it was such a gift,
but definitely tied up all loose ends
with storylines and characters, and I
feel like finally it's done.
But amazing to come back and do that well again
the second time.
Crazy.
Really.
Crazy.
And then there are dolls.
That's how popular the show is-- there are some dolls.
Let's take a look at these dolls.
I mean, these dolls are from Italy.
And I guess-- I wrote this on my Instagram-- this is, I guess,
how they see us.
So like Eric looks like John Travolta.
Shelley, who played Rosario, looks like J.Lo, in the middle.
I look like either I had plastic surgery, well,
so I won't say they're thing because it's a famous person.
So the other thing--
Debra looks like they took fusilli pasta
and just put it on her head.
Megan looks like she 14.
She looks like Ariana Grande.
Yeah.
Boy, they got it right, didn't they?
They really did.
You can hardly see which is the real person and the doll.
All right.
We have to look at what Andy's doing right now.
He does this, like you have to take a break.
Oh, OK.
So.
Break me off a piece of that Kit Kat bar.
We'll be back with Sean.
You have a podcast is called "Smartless"
and it's with Jason Bateman, Will Arnett.
It is hysterical.
It's doing very, very well.
Thanks.
Yeah, at some point, I don't know if it still is, but it's--
we just did it on a whim, and it was so-- you know,
I love those guys.
We've known each other for like 20 years.
And I'm like let's just do this.
And then right before COVID hit, and then we did it,
and then COVID hit.
And we're like well now we can do it through Zoom,
and it turned out to be like the number one comedy
podcast in the world.
Yeah.
And we're like, what?
Three idiots.
I don't know if it still is or where it is, but yeah.
Three hilarious idiots.
Well it's called "Smartless" because we are less smart.
And you've known each other for 20 years.
Yeah.
Where did you meet?
Well, just in and around the business and auditions
and whatever.
But we were just kids, and we would play poker all the time
at Jack Blacks and Kyle Gas.
They're Tenacious D and the band.
And they're good friends, and they're so great.
And so I would bring pizza over after our taping
of "Will & Grace" and go--
you know, and go play poker.
It was just so fun.
So easy.
Who's the best poker player out of the three of you?
I don't know, but I can tell you is the worst.
It's me.
I would go, I would literally show up
and I'd be like I'm all in.
And I would last like 10 minutes.
Yeah.
I'd be like can I get a ride home?
Because I wouldn't have one.
No, I know.
I've played with you before.
Yes, at your house.
And I didn't have any money, and you lent me some money to play.
We told everyone to bring money, and you came up with no money.
Listen to me.
We'll get into this right now.
You did not tell me to bring money.
I said we're playing poker.
I know, but that doesn't mean and bring money.
I thought it was like you were playing
for tokens or something.
Well, anyway.
Yes, I gave you money.
That was so fun though.
It was so fun, but then I gave you money,
and then you won it back.
You won, so you gave me some money back.
Yeah it was a clean getaway.
It was great.
And you're doing another podcast that's
just going to be you, right?
Yes, it's called "Hypochondriactor."
Because I am an actor who's a hypochondriac,
and I do it with a friend of mine a female, Indian, doctor,
stand up comedian, named Dr. Priyanka Wali.
And so we-- because one of my favorite parts of talk shows
and interviews is when people talk about medical issues,
because I think it's fascinating to me,
like what they've survived or gone through.
And if you can relate, try to relate with you about the back,
but didn't want to go there--
and then, but I--
I fished but I got nothing.
So it's fascinating, always been a fascinating subject to me.
So people come on it for like 15 minutes.
We had Kristen Bell on, and Will Arnett
came on, and Alec Baldwin, and all these people.
Wait, wait.
So you really are a hypochondriac?
Yeah, if I haven't had it, I think I'm going to get,
it but chances are I've had it.
Like if you said the name of a body part, inside or out,
I have a true story about it.
OK, liver.
So, liver, I had hepatitis A once.
An acute thing.
I had bad like shell--
shellfish by the seashore.
I had bad shellfish or something,
and I was like jaundiced, and I was really sick.
And it was awful.
My mom flew out, walking me around the block, but--
Ear.
I did have an ear infection once when
I was really, really little.
I don't really remember it, but I grind my teeth at night.
And this pain went from--
it's better I have a mouth guard now.
So a pain went from my thing up through my ear.
I thought I had an ear infection.
This is like two weeks ago, all the way up
to the top of my head.
And I call my doctor, my doctor is like, yeah, wear
your mouth guard.
I'm like, thanks.
Good story.
That was a good game.
Yeah.
It's a fun game.
That's great.
Wow, so you really have had a lot of things wrong with you,
and whatever you haven't had, you think you will be getting.
That is correct.
OK.
All right.
OK, thank you for--
yeah that's basically what I just said.
But I love it, because it just cleared things
up for people that may not be listening.
Right.
Sometimes, when you talk, people just trail off.
And I like-- they're waiting for me to talk, and then I--
But wait, you are not wrong.
You're not wrong, lady.
All right.
What's "Q-Force"?
What are you doing with that?
Great segue.
"Q-Force" is uh-- yeah, well, the only thing missing is
a cigarette.
Yeah, "Q-Force", tell me about that.
So "Q-Force" is an animated show on Netflix that I'm doing with
a bunch of people.
No one's listening to you.
No one's-- All right.
You're not wrong!
All right, "Q-Force" is an animated show that comes out
late summer, early fall on Netflix.
It's basically gay James Bond.
It's a group of LGBTQ super spies,
and we solve the world's problems.
Oh, that's fantastic.
Yeah.
Thanks.
All right, good.
And you're the James Bond?
Yeah, I'm the guy, the handsome guy--
that's why it's animated!
Yeah.
Oh, I love you so much.
All right, we're going to take a break,
and we're going to play a game with Sean after this.
We'll be back.
Hi, I'm Andy.
Ellen asked me to remind you to subscribe to her channel,
so you can see more awesome videos,
like videos of me getting scared or saying embarrassing things--
like ball peen hammer.
And also some videos of Ellen and other celebrities,
if you're into that sort of thing.
Ah!
God [BLEEP].