i'm ecstatic ecstatic
yeah is that something they teach up
there in that fancy school
welcome to watch mojo and today we're
counting down our picks for the top 10
funniest chris rock snl sketches
this is the most shameful thing america
has ever done
your mother's so stupid that she tripped
on a cordless phone
i look crazy for this list we're looking
at the most memorable single or
recurring snl skits
as well as monologues that showcase this
legend's talents
what's your favorite chris rock snl
sketch let us know in the comments
number 10 election night audiences
expected something special when it was
announced that dave chappelle would be
hosting the first snl following the 2016
u.s presidential election
but just as the election results caught
many off guard this sketch
also has a few surprises yeah well of
course you want kentucky i mean that's
where all the racists are as donald
trump claims more votes and advances
towards victory
everyone watching at home is shocked
except for chappelle
that is until chris rock shows up hey
guys what'd i miss
making an unexpected cameo that had the
crowd cheering
rock brings his signature observational
comedy to a historical moment that left
many confused i mean if the country was
55 percent black
we'd have tons of black presidents i
mean flavor flame would be president
as all the white people in the room come
to the revelation that america isn't
quite as they thought
rock and chappelle can't help but make
sarcastic remarks having been ahead of
the curve
why aren't people turning out for
hillary the way they did for barack
obama
i mean maybe because you're replacing a
charismatic 40 year old black guy
with a 70 year old white woman number
nine weekend update
colin powell for a period in the early
90s some
theorized that president george h.w bush
might replace dan quayle with colin
powell for the 1992 presidential
election
if colin powell was vice president i
would kill the president
and tell his mother about it okay in
this weekend update segment
rock delves into why powell likely
wouldn't become the country's first
black vice president
the reasons rock gives aren't quite what
you might expect however
and even if they had a death penalty
even if they had a death penalty what
would happen
i would just get pardoned by the black
president according to rock
if powell were vice president it
wouldn't take long for somebody such as
himself
to remove bush from the equation as long
as you live you will never
see a black vice president you know why
because some black guy would just kill
the president that's why
as far as rock is concerned his plan is
airtight while rock was obviously joking
he was right about a couple of things
bush didn't replace quail with powell
and an african-american has yet to hold
the veep's office
number eight my son college graduate
three years after leaving snl
rock returned for his first time as the
show's host but i'm so proud of you
the first guild mode to graduate from
college
this sketch reunites rock with tim
meadows who plays a recently graduated
college student
rock assumes the role of his father who
shifts from being proud to condescending
the second his son starts using fancy
college words
i'm ecstatic ecstatic
yeah is that something they teach up
there in that fancy school
no matter what meadows does or says rock
finds a way to tie it back to his son's
education
taking everything as a sign of
disrespect these are words that you can
find in the thesaurus you know
the thoughts before you curse at me
again i'll whip your head rock isn't the
only one in the family who knows how to
guilt trip as tracy morgan's grandpa
condemns his son for merely counting
eight now there you go counting again
the irony is that meadows
is four years older than rock while
morgan is the youngest of the three
number seven weekend update peanuts
franklin was the first african-american
character to appear in the peanuts comic
strip
as groundbreaking as franklin was rock
argues that
more could have been done with the
character to most people the first day
of school was a happy time but not to me
rock felt a lot like franklin growing up
as he was also the only black kid in
school
it isn't long until rock's commentary on
the first day of school becomes all
about franklin and his lack of dialogue
you'll see franklin 25 years not one
line
compared to the other peanuts characters
rock strongly believes that franklin has
gone underdeveloped over the decades
jordan plays the piano peppermint pair
is a lesbian
we see where rock is coming from they
don't even invite them to the parties
they don't invite them to the boys no
but snoopy's dancing his ass off right
if snoopy is invited to the party we
think it's also good that franklin gets
his due
number six i'm chillin although rock's
snl tenure is best remembered for his
monologues he also developed a few
recurring characters
now i'm your host on ski to the highest
degree
to the top yo it's all about money
one of his most memorable is onski from
the fictional show i'm chillin
with a wardrobe that screams early 90s
hip-hop onski was usually paired with
his sidekick bfats played by chris
farley
bullet hole tampons cause sometimes
you'll bleed in other places
i'm chilling might not have had the
biggest budget but onski fortunately has
sponsors like bullet hole tampons
and 168th street spring water to keep
him on the air
it's the only spring water i said the
only spring water that comes directly
from a fire hydrant
aside from busting over the top rhymes
honsky and b fats use their platform to
talk about sinbad
and make mother jokes but they never
quite get around to playing rap videos
yo yo yo that's my beeping yo yo we
gotta check that out next week cause
right now i gotta go pick up my baby's
mother i'm chillin returned when rock
hosted in 1996
although jim brewer would fill in for
farley always wipe and stay off the pipe
and if a sucker gets ill
tell him i'm chilling
[Music]
number 5 the dark side michael jackson
another recurring character from rock
nat x was the outspoken host of the dark
side
a 15-minute talk show that actually ran
even shorter
you rudolph the red nosed reindeer he
wasn't black but sure got treated like
he was
the sketch re-teamed rock with farley
who plays a clown named sandman sporting
a massive afro
nat x would often tackle then topical
issues such as the rodney king trial
[Applause]
if we had to single out the episode that
best represented rock's talents as a
performer though
it would have to be nat x's interview
with michael jackson via satellite what
are you trying to say
well not what i'm really trying to say
is it doesn't matter what color
person is black or white because we're
all god's
children doing a spot on impression
that's enhanced by the hair and makeup
crew
rock captures the king of pop to a t i
don't understand why
people just won't leave me alone michael
stop crying
stop crying stop crying although rock is
basically interviewing rock
maddex and jackson have such radically
different personas it's easy to forget
number four 1996 opening monologue
rock is a stand-up comedian first and
foremost so when he hosted in 1996
snl gave rock a platform to do what he
does best every town's got two malls
they got the white mall and the more
white people used to go too
rock kicked off his monologue by
discussing malls and how they've
signified a change in america
since this was three days before an
election though rock naturally dedicated
most of the monologue to bill clinton
that's right running out of money his
wife's a pain in the ass
all his friends are going to jail
you know i know bill clinton i am bill
clinton
rock gives clinton an endorsement of
sorts noting all of the things they have
in common
at the same time rock isn't afraid to
delve into the more infamous aspects of
clinton's first german office
such as his don't ask don't tell
military policy and sexual misconduct
allegations
they want to fight let them fight cause
i ain't fighting
rock also makes some good points about
doctors and the lack of recent medical
advancements
diseases are just piling up man got
cancer and sickle cell you know people
you know jerry's kids still looking
around
you know come on man get rid of
something you know some diseases they
just gave up on
they said the hell with it number three
2014 opening monologue
it took 18 years but rock finally
returned to host snl for the second time
in 2014.
26 miles is a long drive
rock's monologue is fearless to say the
least jumping
right into the upcoming nyc marathon and
the tragedy in boston that occurred a
year earlier
you finally get to the finish line and
somebody screams
run he follows up that bit with a few
words about the freedom tower which
officially opened that year
these toyotas are practically free at
last free land
as you might expect this amounts to even
more controversial jokes
rock transitions from one infamous date
to talking about holiday
commercialization
especially when it comes to jesus's
birthday from what i've read jesus is
the least
materialistic person to ever learn
the earth no bling on jesus
topping off the monologue with
commentary on gun control rock takes no
prisoners whether you found his stand-up
hilarious or shocking
you can see why the monologue got rock
trending on twitter number two
weekend update martin luther king jr day
it's hard to believe but it wasn't until
the year 2000 that all
50 american states officially observed
martin luther king jr day
there's been a lot of talk about the
people of arizona being racist
one of the most notable holdouts was
arizona which influenced the nfl to move
the 1993 super bowl
a few months before arizona finally
voted in the holiday's favor
rock gave his two cents on the issue
rock finds it ridiculous that the
citizens of arizona would reject a day
off
if you don't like black people that's
one thing but what i can't understand is
why people in a hot ass
desert town like tucson arizona wouldn't
want a day off work
when your town is shrouded in extreme
desert heat who would want to leave the
comfort of their air-conditioned home
granted not everybody gets mlk day off
which leads to a few other observations
even james earl ray the man that killed
martin luther king
gets the day off now he's so crazy he's
probably walking around prison going you
know
everybody's off today and nobody even
bothered to thank me rock's parting
words on columbus day
are arguably even more relevant now than
they were in 1992. first of all columbus
discovered the west indies
second of all the land he discovered had
occupants on it you know that's kind of
like discovering somebody's backyard
before we unveil our top pick here are
some honorable mentions
dance vlog this sketch is hashtag
flawless
[Applause]
[Music]
perspectives topical talking with lionel
osborne
when we started the brotherhood for
responsible brothers who are fathers
we had 200 members but that was right
after the march
currently we have six members weekend
update madonna
remember when everyone went crazy for
the sex book you know madonna's cool
i mean she wants blacks and whites to
come together showtime at the apollo
it's anything but amateur night chris
i'm white
how can i survive the apollo the arguing
couple
fitting since rock got leslie jones her
snl audition following an argument
did you order the tickets online i'm not
giving out my credit card number
online to somebody in india so they can
steal my identity
nobody in ender wants to be a cheap lazy
bastard who snores all night
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number one road to the white house while
rock didn't host in 2007
he did surprise snl viewers with a
topical cold open
now in 674 days we're going to have a
new president
and the field is just so crowded with
the 2008
u.s presidential election just over a
year away rock shares his thoughts on
the potential candidates
on the republican side rock notes john
mccain's age and rudolph giuliani's
pitbull tendencies
he's great when they have a burglar but
if you don't he just might
eat your kids as for the democrats it's
clear that the nomination will boil down
to hillary clinton or barack obama
black man or a white woman it's so hard
to make up my mind
rock makes it no secret that obama's got
his vote and correctly predicts that
he'd win the election
thus ensues an uproarious monologue
about sexism racism and the drawn out
road to progress
white women are the majority of the
country and they've had the right to
vote for almost 100 years
and still they've never elected a white
woman president
this cold open captures rock at his
funniest proving a fresh take on current
events
pulling no punches and delivering every
one-liner with firecracker wit
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