Oh hi guys, I’m Andrew and I love a good bad movie.
Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate quality cinema
but a terrible film can be more captivating than an Oscar-winning opus.
I’ll take Whoopi Goldberg fighting crime with a sass-talking t-rex over ‘Shakespeare in Love’ any day of the week.
Because here’s the thing: Behind every bad movie, there’s a tragically talentless filmmaker with a dream.
You are tearing me apart, Lisa!
The best bombs come from a genuine desire to create art,
and the stories behind them are usually more compelling than whatever you’ll see on that 99-cent DVD from the gas station.
With ‘The Disaster Artist’ about to shed some light on the insane story of ‘The Room’ and the bizarre auteur behind it,
I want to see what we can learn about the process from other
Disaster Artists and Movies About Bad Movies.
And, action!
Let’s start with a 1994 tribute from Tim Burton called:
'Ed Wood'
Sounds perfect!
Johnny Depp stars as Edward D. Wood Jr., a man who’s been called the worst director who ever lived.
He gets his foot in the door thanks to a chance meeting with washed-up horror legend Bela Lugosi,
who you might recognize as Dracula
I bid you welcome!
and together, the two create some truly awful films,
From ‘Bride of the Monster’ to ‘Plan 9 from Outer Space,’
the beauty of ‘Ed Wood’ is that he genuinely believes in his movies.
Filmmaking is not about the tiny details, it's about the big picture!
He might be making a film about alien graverobbers, but in his head it’s ‘Citizen Kane.’
Speaking of which, there’s a scene in ‘Ed Wood’ where our hero is at his lowest point.
You're wasting your life making shit! Nobody cares! These movies are terrible!
At least, until he runs into his idol Orson Welles at the bar,
who restores Wood’s confidence with a stirring speech.
Ed, visions are worth fighting for. Why spend your life making someone else's dreams?
His movie still sucks, but there’s something really admirable about a man who’s so willing to throw himself into the abyss of failure.
‘Ed Wood’ is a portrait of an earnest, optimistic man whose love for the movies transcends his lack of taste and talent.
Honestly? It’s probably Tim Burton’s best film.
Martin Landau won an Oscar for his role as Lugosi,
Forget you! Karloff does not deserve to smell my shit!
and it’s the performance of Johnny Depp’s career.
I just read that for the first time, and no it's not!
It's definitely gotta be Jack Sparrow
I think Jack Sparrow is...
If you’re interested in the grimier side of classic Hollywood and you don’t mind black and white, you’ve gotta see ‘Ed Wood.’
How do you get all your friends to get baptized just so you can make a monster movie?
It's not a monster movie, it's a supernatural thriller!
Up next is the story of a less-famous but just as likeable director named Mark Borchardt, as told in the 1999 documentary
'American Movie'
Check it out: Beautiful, stunning black and white shot, right now at the magic hour.
Mark is a struggling filmmaker in suburban Wisconsin who’s desperate to make something of his life.
3,000 units for $45 grand, because if I don't get that $45 grand, I will not be shit.
His dream project is an autobiographical feature film called ‘Northwestern,’
but between unemployment, custody battles and the slow descent into alcoholism,
he can’t come up with the cash to make it.
Instead, he decides to shoot a quickie horror film called ‘Coven.’
'Coven's' a 35-minute direct-market thriller film shot on 16mm black-and-white reversal.
It's an alcoholic man compelled to go to a group meeting by his one and only friend, but they're not that helpful, the group, y'know?
Well, ok, it's technically called 'Coven,' but he pronounces it 'Coven' because it's scarier.
He’s been making movies since he was fourteen, so he’s got a reliable cast of locals to help,
including his best buddy Mike Schank.
He’s a musician and recovering alcoholic who hopes to win the lottery and help finance his friend’s films.
Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose, but it's better than using drugs or alcohol.
Because when you use drugs or alcohol, especially drugs, you always lose.
But even with his very own Barney Gumbel,
It’s clear that Mark’s ambition far outsizes his talent, and the filming of ‘Coven’ is a total disaster.
[SCREAMING] Cut!
Oh man, you allright? Dude, you missed that scoring, man!
But borrowing money from relatives,
maxing out credit cards,
and relying on free labor from friends and family are par for the course in the world of small-town filmmaking,
Gotta give it some passion too, man. 'It's allright, it's okay...'
There's something to live for, Jesus told me so!
and the documentary gives us a glimpse into the personal toll all these indignities can take.
I have absolutely no freaking money, aesthetically I'm not ready, the script is not ready, the locations are scant...
Are you crazy? That's eleven days away from now.
Through sheer determination, and with a lot of help, Mark completes ‘Coven.’
It might be just a cheapo horror flick, but it embodies the spirit of independent filmmaking.
Sometimes you’ve gotta get your hands dirty,
film without permits,
and beg, borrow, or steal every cent you can.
Because you have a story to tell, and you’re the only one who can tell it.
Making a movie is equal parts aggravation and desperation,
and ‘American Movie’ captures it perfectly.
Our first two entries were about what it’s like to make a terrible film, but
'Best Worst Movie'
shows how it feels to be in one.
If you haven’t heard of ‘Troll 2,’ you’ve probably at least seen the infamous
clip where a bespectacled young man freaks out about his future as goblin food:
They're eating her... And then they're going to eat me!
Oh my Goooooooooood!
That one.
I’m sure you have a million questions, and believe me, so did the cast.
When I got on the set, I had no idea what it all meant, what I was doing or what I was saying.
And I didn't see it until 20 years later.
The movie was filmed with local talent from a small town in Utah,
but the rest of the production was flown in from Italy.
Literally the only crewmember who could speak English on set was the costume designer.
The cast could barely read the badly translated script,
and they could only communicate with director Claudio Fragasso through hand gestures and broken sentences.
Go around, go around and after you can [???]
Apparently, he came up with the story after his wife got pissed off when her friends became vegetarians.
You ever go mad you just write and produce and edit a whole movie because your wife got pissed off at her vegetarian friends?
And... Action!
So he decided to make a movie about little vegan goblins who turn people into plants with poison milk so they can eat them.
She's one with the vegetable world!
It's your typical Craigslist bullshit.
The cast was assembled from locals who thought they were trying out to be extras on a big Hollywood movie.
It included a delightfully hammy dentist,
a patient on a day trip from a mental hospital,
and child actor Michael Stephenson.
Growing up, Stephenson had a hard time dealing with the notoriety of starring in IMDB’s lowest rated movie ever,
so he produced and directed ‘Best Worst Movie’ as a way to make sense of his feelings.
I ran from 'Troll 2' and I wanted nothing to do with it.
It’s not just a documentary about the making of 'Troll 2,'
although there are plenty of funny stories, and the Italian director is a hoot.
I feel about as confused as I did when---
DON'T TALK WITH ME! THERE IS A CAMERA! DON'T LAUGH! STAY SERIOUS!
It’s more about coming to terms with being in a cult classic.
Originally, Stephenson was embarrassed by his role in ‘Troll 2,’
and who wouldn't be?
They're... eating my mom!
but later he embraced it with pride.
He realized that it doesn’t matter if you’re reknowned for an amazing, award-winning movie,
or for getting turned into a tree by goblins.
We really were trying to make a good movie, we really were. It just didn't turn out that way.
Fame is fame, and at the end of the day all that matters is that you were part of something that made people happy,
even when that fame turns out to be fleeting.
Have you seen 'Troll 2?'
That brings us to the
'The Disaster Artist'
What can we say about ‘The Room?’
I did not hit her! It's not true! It's bullshit! I did not hit her! I did not!
Oh, hi Mark!
Featuring endless plot holes,
Ridiculous acting,
I got the results of the test back. I definitely have breast cancer.
And severe misuse of footballs and sex scenes,
This 2003 trainwreck could have only exploded from the brain of a mysterious man known as Tommy Wiseau.
You are tearing me apart, Lisa!
God knows where he got the $6 million he spent in pursuit of cinematic glory,
but the resulting dumpster fire is a beautiful, once-in-a-lifetime artistic atrocity.
What kind of drugs do you take?!
It's nothing like that!
What the hell is wrong with you?
Stop ganging up on me!
Thanks to word-of-mouth, the gospel of ‘The Room’ spread like wildfire,
and on any given weekend you can probably find a showing where diehard fans interact with the film and throw plastic spoons at the screen, ‘Rocky Horror’ style.
Now, ‘The Disaster Artist’ is getting rave reviews, thanks to its incredible cast and fascinating story.
And, fun fact, Tommy Wiseau always dreamed of being played by James Franco, so that's good for him.
I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark!
I know I can't wait to see it, like it says it in my script but I'm dying to see it,
because it seems like a combination of everything I love about these three movies.
It's like you say, Hollywood rejects us, then we do it on our own!
Tommy Wiseau is a deluded dreamer, just like Ed Wood.
He can’t direct traffic, but somehow you still want him to succeed.
The actual filming was stressful, chaotic, and borderline disastrous,
While the cast and crew suffered nearly as much as Mark in ‘American Movie.’
And, just like the kid from ‘Troll 2,’ they found themselves under an unexpected spotlight once the film became a cult classic.
Star Greg Sestero turned his story into an incredible book, and the film looks even better.
Why, Lisa? Why, Lisa? Please talk to me, please!
Hopefully, it’ll make more people appreciate the blood, sweat and tears behind even the baddest movie.