I thought I would do something different today.
I thought that instead of talking, what if I come out
here and rap, you know?
[CHEERING]
Yes.
Like, kind of--
[LAUGHTER]
--like bust a rhyme, spit some bars, vanilla some ice,
you know what I'm saying?
Then I realized I can't rap.
But I know somebody who can.
Please welcome the creator of the hit Broadway musical
Hamilton, Lin-Manuel Miranda.
[CHEERING]
I want to tell you what I--
first of all, yeah, exactly.
This guy is a genius.
You are a genius.
Thank you.
[CHEERING]
You are.
Have a seat.
You are a G-E-N-Y-O-U-S--
Woo!
--is what you are--
genius.
And you took one of our founding fathers, Alexander Hamilton.
You made an entire hip hop musical about it
that was interesting and fascinating and so,
so successful.
And I thought, I want you to rap for us today.
But I'm going to give you the subject matter.
OK.
So you're going to just off the top of your head--
because he's that good.
He can just rap.
But not, like, chicks and Ciroc Vodka
because a lot of people, that's what they rap about,
the rappers, Ciroc Vodka and chicks.
Yeah.
So you're not going to do that.
That's too easy.
I'll do whatever you like.
I'm going to give you--
you know when you hold the door open for somebody,
and they go through, and they don't thank you?
Yeah.
Yeah, rap about--
That?
Yeah.
[RAP MUSIC]
[CLAPPING]
(RAPPING) Yo, Ellen, held the door for this old lady.
Walked by saying nothing, so shady.
Is this Trump's America?
Oh, man, so rude.
I hate this Whole Foods.
[LAUGHS] It was a Whole Foods?
Whole Foods.
So rude, Whole Foods.
[APPLAUSE]
All right.
I didn't even say it was at Whole Foods, and in my mind,
I thought it was Whole Foods.
All right, so now that we're in a grocery store,
you know when you get a shopping cart,
and one wheel just keeps turning and turning and turning?
Yeah.
So aggravating.
Uh.
(RAPPING) Looking for Sriracha, Ciroc Vodka.
Can't find it in the supermarket, I gotcha.
Oh, man, then I fall on the floor.
Squeaky wheel.
Please, cleanup on aisle four!
[CHEERING]
Yo.
They don't sell Ciroc Vodka at the supermarket,
at that Whole Foods where that old lady was mean to me.
Still, you work in Ciroc Vodka.
That's OK, though.
All right, when you're in the shower and you
run out of hot water.
Ooh, that's-- [GROANS]
Uh.
(RAPPING) Yeah, taking the hot shower.
I feel like I'm in a sauna.
Do what I wanna.
Oh, then it gets colder than fudge ripple.
I could cut the shower door open with my nipple!
[CHEERING]
Both of them.
No, just one, just this one.
[LAUGHS]
Just one.
Yeah.
I'm getting out.
It was just that big of a hole?
Yeah, it was like a heist, like a heist movie, I kind of--
I see.
All right, this is really aggravating.
They make you update your phone too many--
like, you just updated it.
Then they want another update.
Too many updates.
So how often do you have to update a phone?
Turn it up.
[RAP MUSIC]
(RAPPING) Yo.
Oh, I got an update to my settings.
Now, I'm utterly bed-wetting.
I say, no.
They say, can we do it between 2:00 and 4:00?
I say no, I don't want to do it.
I know the score.
And so I just get so fed up, I switch to a Samsung.
And the thing just blows up.
[CHEERING]
Genius.
Same nipple.
Stay consistent with that same nipple.
All right, finally, rap about this dancer.
[MUSIC - COLBY O'DONIS, LADY GAGA, "JUST DANCE"]
(SINGING) And just dance.
[SCATTING]
Just dance, just, just, j-j-just dance.
[RAP MUSIC]
[LAUGHS] What's her name?
Do we know her name?
What's your name?
Nancy.
(RAPPING) Uh.
Yo, I'm not Iggy Azalea, Mrs. Nancy.
But the way you dance is just so damn fancy.
Uh, and got the blue scarf.
Oh, yeah, man, you just-- yeah, swing it back and forth.
Yeah, I like the way that you swing it.
The colors are swinging.
It's like Martina Hingis with a racket.
I can't stand it.
I can't hack it.
You're tremendous.
Nancy, let's-- I'll see you after the show.
[CHEERING]
Lin-Manuel Miranda, everybody!
[CHEERING]
How are you feeling?
I know that you campaigned very hard for Hillary.
It did not go our way.
But that just means we keep going.
Yes, we just keep going.
Yeah.
[CHEERING]
You actually started this whole thing--
I guess it would have happened anyway.
But you performed at the White House was it 2009--
Yeah, 2009.
--for the Obamas.
And they wanted you to sing.
And then you said, hey, I have this song I'm working on.
And you did something--
I wasn't even done with the song when they asked.
I finished the song when they asked and sort of did it
for the first time at the White House.
That's risky.
Yeah, that happened in 2009.
And we opened in 2015.
It was crazy to watch the documentary-- if you
get a chance to see it, it really
is, explaining-- they follow you from the beginning of writing
this, when you're about to have a child.
And there's so much going on in your life.
But it really is amazing how hard you worked on this.
I mean, you won every award that you could possibly win.
You knew you were doing something different and great.
But did you think it was going to be this great?
Well, you can't control that part of it, right?
All you can do is-- it's a little like our election.
All you can do is your part.
You do the best you can.
Most shows on Broadway don't make their money back.
About one in five do.
So you can't do it because you think it's
going to have all this success.
You have to do it because--
you have to live with the fact that if this opens and closes
in a night, it will have been worth it for me.
I'm proud of my work.
I'm proud of what I made.
And then to have it connect in this way
is sort of the incredible, great--
I mean, I'm on Ellen, you guys.
[CHEERING]
I'm, like, part of her show.
[LAUGHS] I'm talking to you.
You're here.
You've made it.
You're not on my TV.
You're here.
Now, you've made it now.
Yeah.
Now, when you're doing-- because I mean, the rap is so fast.
And there's a guy on there that raps even faster than you.
Oh, Diggs.
Yeah, Daveed Diggs is incredible.
But have there been nights that you just-- because everyone
just spaces out.
You have a brain freeze, and you forget the words, or you--
and once you trip up on a rap like that, then you're off.
I don't think I went a week without messing up at least one
of my lines.
Really?
There are 23,000 words in the show.
You're going to mess some of them up.
And so you just kind of go.
And I have a scene with George Washington.
And Chris Jackson is talking to me.
And I'm supposed to say, you'll need all the help you can get.
I have some friends--
Laurens, Mulligan, Marquis de Lafayette.
OK, what else?
That's the line.
Then, as he's talking to me before that line,
I look up and go, I never knew Jasmine stood there
during the song.
And as I'm thinking that, it's my line.
And I went, you need all the help you can get.
I have some friends, Maurens, Lulligan, [GIBBERISH]
what else?
[LAUGHS] That's all you did?
And that happens.
You just kind of got to keep going.
[CHEERING]
Maurens, Lulligan.
Yeah.
But the thing is, that audience probably
just thought that's the way you were going to do that line.
Wow, he is so--
[GIBBERISH]
--he's so tongue-tied around Washington.
It's so real.
So you took some time-- so now, you
get to relax a little bit because that schedule had
to be just grueling.
Yeah.
And you went with your family to Austria.
Yes, yes, my wife's mom's side of the family, my mother-in-law
is from Austria.
We went on a big--
15 Puerto Ricans going to Austria.
And my dad got to live his dream of the Von Trapp--
like, the movie we saw the most growing up
was The Sound Of Music.
And my dad, in his own mind, is Maria Von Trapp.
So we did The Sound Of Music Tour.
He hired a film crew and had us sing "Do-Re-Mi"
in all the spots where they filmed the movie.
Look at crazy Puerto Rican Maria Von Trapp.
[LAUGHS]
That's me and my nephew and my kid--
[APPLAUSE]
Oh, my god.
--singing, do, a deer.
It was so crazy.
Look for it on YouTube soon.
Oh, my god, that's hilarious.
Look at him.
Look at him go.
He looks like I don't know what, like Luigi.
He looks like a leprechaun, a tiny, tiny bit.
Oh, my god, that's hilarious.
Yeah.
That's hilarious.
All right, we have to take a break.
But when we come back, you are good at everything.
You really are.
You're good at everything.
But I found out you have a special skill that is--
it's an incredible skill.
I didn't know someone could actually master this.
Well, here's the weird--
I didn't.
It's the one thing in my life that is God-given.
I worked very hard to get good at writing songs and acting
and all the things that I do for a living.
But the claw machine is a talent of God that I have--
God has given it to me, and I don't know why.
He does not ever miss.
And I have been working all day--
I get it, and then it drops it.
And anyway, we're going to work the claw machine.
And if he gets a certain amount right,
you're going to win something.
[CHEERING]
So we're going to play this game.
It's called Lin for the Win.
And let's go easy on you.
If you get two in a row, I am going
to give the audience a gift.
[CHEERING]
Can I point out which one?
Yeah, sure.
That looks too easy, that pink ball right there.
So why don't we go for the gold and blue ball right there?
OK.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[APPLAUSE]
[CLAPPING]
[CHEERING]
(SINGING) Oh!
You're simply the best.
I don't know why I was chosen.
I don't know why I was chosen--
Oh.
--with this stuff.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
All right, get the pink ball in the back.
OK.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[CLAPPING]
I shake the claw.
Oh!
No!
[CHEERING]
(SINGING) Oh!
You're simply the best.
Wow.
All right.
You get a ball. you get a ball.
You get a ball.
[MUSIC PLAYING]