- I will never ever ever, forget the time
somebody actually said to me,
Amy you're not stuck.
You're never stuck, because I looked at him
and I was like,
you wrong! I'm feeling real stuck.
So I'm not gonna pretend like I am unfamiliar
with the fact that when you are in that position,
it really truly does feel
like there are no other alternatives
and that you are a victim of your circumstance.
It can be difficult to change that.
I am no strangers that feeling.
But if I have to think back on that moment
and how crazy I thought that person was
for telling me that I wasn't stuck
when I was the only one in that situation.
I look back on that
and I know for sure that they were right.
I completely understand if you feel
like there's something happening right now that you hate,
that you want out of, that you need to progress from
but you feel like you are not actually
being given the choice to do so
because of other things going on.
So maybe it's that you have a job and you hate that job
but you have to pay rent, right?
You may feel like you're stuck.
There is no guarantee that if you leave
and found something else that you would be able to
pay bills as efficiently as you do right now.
But when we say those words out loud
does it sound a little silly?
Sometimes it really pays
to actually say these things out loud
so that we can actually hear in real words
and breath and voice, the crazy things
that we are limiting of ourselves,
and still, you may say, it's not crazy, Amy.
It is my reality.
I don't make enough money.
I hate my job.
I have these things going on.
I am stuck.
I'd like for you to potentially reframe this.
Just because you decided to watch this video
I want you to at least be willing to say, what if I wasn't?
What if I wasn't stuck?
What if I'm thinking about this, the wrong way.
Your back probably feels like it's against a wall.
It may only feel like you're suffocating
because your back's against the wall
and you have already architecturally designed
with your brain, three other walls, putting you in a box.
I'm in a box, Amy, I'm stuck.
I am absolutely stuck.
I'm in this box.
I know something better exists
but I don't see my way out of it.
In the meantime, you are not looking
at every other one of those walls to see if they are real.
Because in fact, you have created them.
In that situation where someone said to me
you are not stuck.
You are never stuck.
My back was against the wall, but I mistook it for a box.
There is no box.
Those three walls are only made up of your own excuses.
Sorry to break it to you.
Probably hard to hear my excuses at the time,
I can't change my life because my finances would be unknown.
I can't change my life
because I don't know if anyone would want me.
I can't change my life
because this is a sure thing I can wake up to tomorrow,
and my enemy that I know is better
than the one that I don't.
So we really use plaster on those fake walls.
When the only one that actually exists is the one behind us.
So how is it that we're able to progress
with such a mindset issue.
Since you're willing to reframe the stuckness
that is your life right now,
I'm gonna tell you exactly how to get out of it.
And that is with the power of will.
Not willpower.
You know, everybody says,
Oh it's just a little bit of willpower.
Or that person just has a lot of willpower.
And I don't. That is the easiest excuse in the world.
Therefore the word willpower
really annoys the crap out of me
because it does not actually explain what is going on.
If something progresses,
or if someone says they cannot progress.
I'm not talking about willpower,
I'm talking about the power of will.
And I'm gonna break it down for you. W, what is your why?
We talk about this a lot here
because it's really, really, really, really really
hard to go after the life you want
if you don't know why you give a crap about it .
That's it like that's the story.
And it's also important because we mistake
our why, for something that is just beautiful
and lovely, could be turned into a song,
certainly looks good in an Instagram bio.
Your why, is not dependent on what the world thinks of it.
Your why, is yours and yours alone.
Your why, may sound a little selfish.
Your why, may not be aesthetically pleasing.
Your why, is for you so that when you open your eyes
and you see the ceiling every morning,
which in our little box situation
is a clear blue sky of opportunity.
We want to see it as that.
And we wanna have a good reason to know
that when we get up,
we are not going to be surrounded by four walls.
We're going to be able to move forward.
And so we have to see why that sounds so appealing.
If we don't know why we wanna go
after the life we want, we don't do it.
And then we are a victim of circumstance,
all to our own fault.
You need to know why you want a better position
in your career.
You need to know why you wanna start a business.
You need to know why you wanna have kids.
You need to know why you wanna get married.
You need to know why you're going to change
anything going on in your life.
And you need to be really honest with yourself about it.
Most people are not, most people will choose a why,
when they're scrolling Instagram.
Oh, well, I'd really like to visit Bali someday.
That's a good why.
Okay? Good for you.
Is it like baked into your soul?
That your life will not be complete
until you go there? Sick.
That's it that's then that's it.
But if it's just so that you can add it
to the list of things that everybody seems to be able to do
on their highlight reel and you haven't done yet,
that's not enough, why,
you do what you do needs to be all yours.
There was a time where my why, was just so
that I could work from home and snuggle with my dog all day.
That's it.
I just didn't wanna leave.
Cause I liked hanging out with her.
If that's good enough for me,
and that got me to leave my job
and work for myself and I haven't turned back in a decade,
that worked.
Why do you want this?
And if you struggle with your why,
it's because you will not even allow
yourself to make a decision
as simple as why you want something.
You continue to look out at what everybody
is telling you to do.
And you're hoping somebody will tell you
what that why should be.
I can't tell you what your why should be.
That's yours and yours alone.
I stands for initiative.
You can't just wish for a why,
and then wish for the results to come.
You need to know you have to do something
in order for that to happen.
An initiative is what you need to get there.
When you take action
even something so small as waking up 15 minutes earlier,
or starting the first sentence
of that book you wanna write.
You are taking initiative.
You are saying,
I am willing to accept all the responsibility
of the result of this situation.
Even if a million other things have to happen
in order for it to be a success.
And I do need other people to support me on the way there.
I will do whatever I can on my own, or connect myself
to the people who can help me move the needle.
I will take initiative.
This is a major
major missing component for most people.
Even if they are lucky enough
to know exactly what their why is.
Even if they're lucky enough to have a clear vision,
if they never take initiative, it can not happen.
It doesn't matter what family you're born into
or how lovely your silver platters have been.
If you don't take initiative
even the greatest things that are gifted to us
aren't worth anything.
You have to take action.
If you cannot start it's because you continue
to wait for someone to tell you
what to do and hold your hand.
Do you wanna live a life on your own terms?
It involves a lot of walking with no handholding.
Do not wait for someone to grab on and take you.
You've got to go first.
Initiative, that step, that plan,
writing down your ideas, starting something.
That's the initiative.
When you do that,
everyone's wondering where they get the momentum.
Where do I get the momentum to do the rest?
Amy, I gotta finish.
I gotta be a finisher,
if I want to say, yes, you do.
If you start, you will feel the effects of that momentum.
You will feel the effects of taking initiative.
It will take you further.
You do have to keep going.
It never gets easier.
So if you can't come to terms with that from the jump,
then you can keep staring up at them blue sky.
Cause that's it.
Once you have your why, and you have your initiative,
you need your two Ls.
Your low and your luw.
We're already super familiar with your low.
That's the life that's over with.
That's the back against the wall.
What has your back against the wall?
Or when do you remember a time
when your back was against the wall?
Did your credit card get declined
when you were trying to check out with groceries?
Were you in an abusive relationship verbally,
physically, doesn't matter.
Are you in a dead end job
where your boss treats you like garbage?
When your back is against the wall you know it.
But be self-aware enough to say,
this is the situation right now.
It does not define me.
And it is a place I never want to return.
That is hopefully not your starting point
but a previous point in your journey.
A previous point in your journey
where we are going to ride this vehicle away
from as much as possible.
The why is our vehicle?
The initiative is our gas.
We are pedal to the metal away from the low,
because we are on our way to the luw.
Not that loo friends in the UK.
(laughs) I just put that together.
We're not going there.
Those are pit stops. Okay?
The luw, you're probably very familiar with around here
is the life you want.
Your why, and your luw may feel very, very similar to you.
But I want you to think of your luw, as your legacy.
When you think about the life you want,
what has happened during your time?
If you've done all your things,
and you've lived all those missions and you've delivered
and you've gotten away from the low,
and you took your initiative to the next level,
how has that benefited the life of yourself,
the life of others, the life that you leave behind?
You can even break it down as simply as
what does a great day look like for you?
Just that short term vision can help us get to the longterm.
That's often what I like to think of, even with my whys.
I just wanna wake up and do this every day.
And if I did, that would be amazing.
And I can get through all of the challenging times,
I can get through all of the moments
where I can't get my ideas out
or I can't come up with something new to create.
I can push through all of that.
I can push through, making more money
and making sure my team gets paid
and I can push through all that,
if I can just have my dream scenario.
You can't keep looking outward
for these answers that are inside of you.
You have to quiet all of the voices, put the phone away,
turn off the negativity around you.
Yes. They're probably human with heartbeats.
Okay. We don't have to tell them that they're the negativity
but we can walk away and have a conversation with ourselves.
And be honest and be able to say
that my why, may not be nice to anyone else
but it is the reason that I will keep going.
I promise you that if you feel stuck right now,
if you keep going,
if you notice that the other three walls are a fabrication
of your really messed up mind,
that likes to penalize you as much as possible
more than anyone else on earth.
And you go past
where those theoretical walls are to get away
from the one that is actually making you feel this way.
You will get through it. Period.
You will have a moment where me telling you right now
that you are not stuck is like, Oh yeah, she was right.
I wasn't stuck.
Believe me, I didn't think
that day was going to come from me either.
Be patient, things are not easy for a reason.
If they were easy, everyone would do it.
You are going to do it
because you believe that you can earn it,
and you will earn it with the power of will.
That's all for today.
Thank you so much for tuning in.
I appreciate it.
As always remember, subscribe for good vibes,
kiss the ones you love and go after the life you want.
Cheers.
Incase you need a little bit more motivation,
I made some more videos for you to check out.
click here or click here.
There's probably other things to click on too.
I just like waving my hands around.
Like I know exactly what's going on.
I don't.