There are times in our lives, where we are confronted with nearly impossible choices.
The conundrums we encounter could be reality shaking with millions implicated,
or fictitious constructs for our entertainment.
The type of impossible questions, that I find most intriguing however,
are the ones that most would say have obvious logical solutions,
but for whatever reason, those solutions receive no follow-through.
To be precise, saying an answer is much simpler, than implementing an answer.
This is because of the inner tension, that arises when reason conflicts with emotion.
The one might proclaim a dedication to reason,
how often do we desire what is ultimately destructive to ourselves?
How often in our history have we seen world leaders and supposedly wiser elders,
promote, that which is in direct opposition to our welfare?
As much as we might like to decry the stupidity of our fellow man and worship the beauty of reason.
We nevertheless recognize the bliss, that comes through smashing things.
Worse yet are the ways we justify our own irrational and destructive tendencies to ourselves.
The Last of Us is a game that beautifully illustrates the human tendency to act against reason.
While the game features several characters acting immorally or against their own self-interest.
The tension between emotion and reason is best exemplified with the games ending.
Let me propose a scenario. The world is in a post-apocalyptic state.
The majority of the world's remaining population is infected with an incurable virus.
Efforts to preserve order continuously seem to be in vain.
However, you possess a possible cure to the supposedly incurable virus.
And it lies in the DNA of somebody you love more, than anything in the world.
Someone who is immune to the infection.
This is the basic plot of the Last of Us.
With a character of Ellie being the person who was immune, and Joel being her guardian.
At the end of the game Joel finds out, that in order to create this cure, it is necessary to kill Ellie.
The only person he has left in this world that he cares about.
I ask you, if you were in Joel's place, would you let the person you love more than anything die,
if it meant you could save the human race?
If we took a utilitarian perspective, as I think we instinctually do,
most would agree, that they would sacrifice the person they loved to save billions.
As terrible a dilemma that maybe. The utilitarian answer is rational.
We speak the utilitarian answer, but I'm not so convinced that if we actually were in that situation,
we would act in a utilitarian fashion, even if we were given the choice in the game.
I don't believe we would act so quote-unquote rationally.
Allow me to cite the following evidence to back my skepticism.
There is another game where one is offered a similar choice - Life is Strange.
Though the game received nowhere near the critical acclaim of the Last of Us.
And in my opinion rightly so the example will serve its purpose.
At the end of Life is Strange, the player must decide between:
Saving their best friend Chloe or saving their hometown of Arcadia Bay.
The lead-up to this decision is convoluted,
so don't worry too much about why saving one necessitates sacrificing the other.
The reason why I bring up this example is because,
Life is Strange calculates how many players made one choice or the other.
According to the Life is Strange Wiki, 47% of people playing the game,
chose to sacrifice thousands of people in order to save Chloe.
To the supposed warriors of reason, so often found in our public discourse,
such a statistic might seem appalling.
But such a big number begs the question: what was the rationale of that 47%?
Maybe the 53% missed something important?
What's even harder to contemplate is how that 47% views the 53% and vice-versa?
And striking the right balance between reason and emotional consideration, there lies a shadow of doubt.
A shadow that contains an unconscionable number of factors that need to be weighed,
in order to make the appropriate decision.
Even the greatest examples of human intellect,
struggle to strike the ideal balance when it comes to similar questions.
For the weaker amongst us such decisions might kill us.
Many of us may have said from the outside looking in, that sacrificing Ellie would be the rational decision.
But is it are there other factors that we might be neglecting,
that might make what initially seemed rational, become wholly irrational.
Some would argue that even if the situation might leave them heartbroken,
they would nonetheless make the sacrifice.
When I initially played the game back in 2013, I said the same thing.
And up until recently I still held that position.
However, with the impending release of the Last of Us: Part Two,
I found myself reflecting on my experience with the first game.
I tried to understand Joel psychology and what made him ultimately decide to save Ellie's life,
murder several scientists and thus sacrifice humanity.
I made a list of all the various tragedies Joel had suffered from,
and tried to weigh that against my initial utilitarian approach.
Upon doing so I was horrified to find reason in Joel's decision.
Let's go in chronological order.
Before the infection outbreak Joel was a single dad struggling to make a living as a carpenter.
The exact circumstances which led to him being a single dad are unknown.
But the game's dialogue makes it clear, that this subject is one that causes Joel personal stress.
Based on all the supplementary material available to us,
it's reasonable to assume that his now deceased a daughter Sarah was the sole object of his affection.
Upon losing whom he loved most through needlessly cruel circumstances,
the logical conclusion was suicidal ideation.
If the world is already going to hell and you lost what is most precious to you,
that would make anybody at least contemplate the act.
In response to this tragedy it seemed that,
Joel had to reorganize his moral compass and suppress his emotions.
In the 20 years that transpired between losing his daughter and meeting Ellie,
Joel engaged in criminal activity. Sometimes he did it to survive,
Other times he did it because he rationalized the actions to himself.
Joel's brother Tommy eventually became so offended by Joel's methods,
that he abandoned him to join the militia group known as the fireflies.
During the events of the Last of Us has main campaigned,
several more tragic things challenged Joel's mental stability.
He is betrayed by his business partner Robert.
He has to watch Tess, a woman who he was close to die brutally.
He had to watch the character of Sam turn into an infected zombie,
and watch his brother Henry commit suicide.
Which was especially tragic because they were much more likeable and moral,
than anybody else Joel had encountered.
Later on Joel almost dies fighting off bandits.
Eventually being impaled on a piece of rebar.
Finally he has to watch Ellie be traumatized upon escaping a horde of cannibals.
If I were to put myself in Joel's shoes, twenty years of experiences like these,
might cause one to ponder certain uncomfortable questions.
Is the human race worth saving?
Is there a transcendent purpose to all the suffering I have dealt with?
In a world as dark as the one presented in this game,
it would seem almost impossible for most people to hold on to humanity.
Whether its humanity in terms of the human race, or humanity in terms of benevolence.
A dualism which gives the title the Last of Us its meaning.
Whether it's in nonfiction or fiction,
only a select few characters managed to maintain their humanity, despite the malevolence of existence.
And those tend to be the ones that are most revered.
So revered in fact that they inspire religions.
One only needs to make a cursory glance at history to realize, that most human beings are not like that.
Given all that has been established about Joel's history,
all the needless suffering he has been through, I ask you again.
If you were in his shoes, would you give up the one thing that sustained you,
that sustained the last of your humanity for the supposed greater good?
If the greater good is the human race, and the human race hasn't been so kind to you.
I think it is likely that the human tendency to take revenge against existence itself would overcome us.
We would smash things for the sake of primordial satisfaction.
Except in Joel's case, his love for somebody overcame what was left of his rationality.
And he used that love to justify his actions.
For that reason I think it's safe to say, that many of us would have done what Joel did.
Joel took revenge against the parameters of existence.
In his mind he figures that it's not fair, that he not only had to suffer the loss of his daughter,
but would have to live through that trauma again.
For most people that level of suffering might be too much for the soul to bear.
But herein lies the brilliance of the Last of Us.
Unlike most games that have come before or after,
The Last of Us dared to ask these difficult questions.
Even though it dared to show the depths of human depravity and tragedy in all its raw honesty.
Doing so showed us what is so special, so beautiful about being human.
It is precisely our irrationality that makes us so unique.
Even if Joel made the wrong decision, it is certainly understandable,
and to a certain degree reasonable.
Even if his emotion is irrational in terms of its wider implications,
one cannot deny how that irrationality exposes the depths of his love.
It is by juxtaposing love against all of life's tragedy, that gives love its meaning and density.
It is by demonstrating not just saying, that you will go through the depths of Hell for somebody.
That gives love its greatest expression.
Even if Joel's ultimate decision dooms the human race, and maybe his soul,
it is nonetheless admirable how he would cast rationality to the wind,
so that he could be a father figure to Ellie.
That is why the Last of Us, in my opinion, remains one of the most heralded and cherished games of all time.
And made us reflect on our own humanity, our own morals.
It made us reflect on those who gave meaning to this existence,
and the lengths we go to keep them in our lives.
I am terribly curious as to how the Last of Us Part 2 will continue this investigation into human nature.
Well, Ellie find out what Joel did to the scientists and how he might have doomed humanity.
If so, what will that realization do to her on a psychological level?
Maybe she'll take her own revenge against existence and do something that is also unconscionable.
In one article I read about the game,
it seems that for the majority of the Last of Us Part 2, Ellie is fueled by hate.
Whether that hate was inspired by Joel's actions or something else entirely, one thing is for certain,
Ellie's motivations will be all too human.
And I'm gonna kill...
every last one of them.