are you being ignored by someone you care about if so you know it's one of
the most frustrating and difficult situations to deal with especially when
you don't know the reason that's why in this video I'm going to share the top
reasons why your man is ignoring you and I'm going to tell you exactly what to do
about each of them don't go anywhere because we're starting
right now hi everyone I'm Dr. Antonio Borrello and I'm a psychologist and a
relationship coach. This channel is all about helping you build great
relationships so you can grow happy with the people you love so if you're
interested in making your love life the best part of your life start now by
clicking the subscribe button and hit the bell notifications so you aren't
missing anything okay on to our topic why is your man
ignoring you and how do you turn things around and I'm also going to tell you
the things you absolutely must not do when he ignores you because doing these
things will simply make your situation worse so make sure you stick around to
get those last tips they are super important I need to make an important
distinction about being ignored sometimes you know why a person is
ignoring you perhaps there was an argument disappointment or a
disagreement and now a person is intentionally ignoring you as a form of
punishment or manipulation in this case you know what caused him to change he's
upset and intentionally ignoring you but other times you have no idea why a man
is ignoring you and that makes you feel very anxious it leaves you in the dark
trying to figure out what happened it makes you question everything so I want
to start with the situations where you don't know why first because they are
the most difficult to deal with so without further ado here's number 1
maybe he's not alone ok let's just get this first one out of the way some
people put their phones away when they are visiting with family or friends or
when they are working closely with a colleague and if that's the case he
probably does the same thing when he's with you but if he is a person who is
constantly taking calls and texts even when you're together then you might
question his motives for ignoring your calls or texts is he ignoring you
because he is with someone that he's hiding from you let me give you an
example a woman I no was cheating on her boyfriend and
whenever she was spending time with her boyfriend she would block the other
guy's number on her phone that way she wouldn't risk attacks or call coming
through and having to explain to her boyfriend and when she was with the
other guy she temporarily blocked her boyfriends number she basically ignored
the other person until she was once again alone and sometimes that was hours
but sometimes that was days now if this is the first time it's happened you
shouldn't jump to any conclusions just pay attention to his explanation when he
comes around does he come up with some elaborate story or explanation or is
this explanation much more mundane if he's ignoring you because he is with
another woman you're bound to see this pattern happening more than once number
two he's ghosting you are fading you out oftentimes someone you're dating becomes
distant and unresponsive because they're afraid of the confrontation of breaking
up with you they would rather fade out of a
relationship than end it properly so if he no longer initiates
communication and is very slow to respond to you with one or two word
answers then he's using ignoring you as a breakup method he's hoping that you'll
eventually get fed up of being ignored him and the relationship yourself or
you'll just stop trying and the relationship will fizzle out without any
kind of confrontation so what can you do in this situation well instead of being
strung along tell him this if this isn't working out for you I
understand I just need to know so I can move on without any doubt or hesitation
then if he wants to break up you've given him the opportunity and if he
doesn't want to break up it gives you an opportunity to communicate your needs
and expectations for the relationship and fYI being ignored is incredibly
difficult to handle and often makes you feel like you're in a panic mode and
here's why being ignored forces you to deal with uncertainty and ambiguity and
your brain does not like uncertainty or ambiguity especially when you can
imagine scenarios in which you are threatened or fearing a loss I've talked
about this before being ignored activates a threat response in the
amygdala the part of the brain responsible for processing emotional
reactions and threat responses and it's so difficult to handle
because that part of our brain can't separate physical threats like someone
coming at you with a knife from silly threats like someone not responding to
your text message so when you're being ignored it makes you feel almost like
you're panicking because it's triggering the same part of your brain number three
he's playing games or he's just not into you I've grouped these two together
because you confront and resolve them the same way so let's start with the
possibility that he's playing mind games this is often the case when you have no
idea what happened or why he's ignoring you see at the beginning of a
relationship a man may believe he has to play hard-to-get in order to sustain
your interest and get you wanting him more this kind of behavior is a powerful
form of manipulation that sadly can be very effective because it works he
purposefully ignored you or takes longer and longer to respond to you because he
wants you to experience that uncertain panic response so that you'll be more
receptive to him when he does reply the second part of this perhaps he's just
not into you this can be a difficult truth to accept we often choose to
believe that someone is just busy or naturally bad at texting which is why
they are ignoring us or so inconsistently responding but trust me
when I tell you this no one is that busy no one is too busy to text you good
morning or to check on you it takes 30 seconds if you are important and a high
priority he will find the time or he will make the time for you period if he
doesn't either he's just not that into you or he's just not ready to be serious
about anyone because he is focused on achieving whatever he's doing and he's
prioritizing those things over everything else so what do you do well
you call him out on this behavior you can say something like this you've
seemed really distant the past couple of days you haven't been calling or texting
and it takes you hours and days to respond to my message with one or two
words what's going on are you okay that lets him know that you've noticed a
change in his behavior and it gives him an opportunity to explain while giving
you the chance to set the expectations for your relationship and not in a
complaining way but in a way where you convey the message that this isn't what
you signed up for so either this is the real
him or the guy he was before is the real him and either that guy comes back or
you're out and don't be surprised if he tries to deny what you're experiencing
and if he does deny it you've still put him on notice that you
expect more number four he is punishing you intentionally ignoring someone as a
form of punishment and manipulation is the most common pattern of conflict in a
committed relationship it's also one of the most damaging perhaps there was an
argument or maybe he was disappointed about something and is motivated by
revenge so he resorts to ignoring you because he wants you to feel the pain
that uncertainty provokes but regardless of his reasoning being ignored is
incredibly frustrating and not a healthy way to solve a dispute and the silent
treatment is tremendously damaging to a relationship it decreases relationship
satisfaction for both partners it diminishes feelings of intimacy and it
reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful so how
should you deal with this well do your best to find out what's wrong do not
give him the silent treatment back if one or both of you need space well
establish that and since communication is often the issue try to discuss and
understand the situation but if your attempts to communicate go unanswered
after a day or so consider sending this message to him hey I see you're not
responding to me I'm not sure why but I want to understand why you are angry or
upset or sad if you're not ready to talk or if you need space I understand the
silent treatment is hard for me so could you let me know maybe we can find a time
to talk in the next few days but I can't continue with this relationship if you
keep shutting me out and that's it no more than that and often that is enough
to get an immediate response and usually provokes a communication within a few
days nevertheless your job is done and you must let it go trust me if
you've been trying and trying to get him to talk he will notice when you've
stopped and that's when the table's get turned okay now onto these super
important things that you absolutely must not do keep watching because if you
do these things you're ruining your chances of making
right again number one don't keep calling and texting if there's a
legitimate reason why he's not responding as much over texting or over
calling just to get an answer we'll come off as possessive and insecure and a
little crazy and it's counterproductive think about it if you're constantly
texting and calling and begging him to talk to you how is he feeling is he
worried about losing you is he concerned that maybe his behavior was manipulative
nope he's not worried about anything though he should be he should be
worrying that you are growing tired of his manipulative behaviors he should be
worried that you are not going to tolerate his bad behavior but he won't
be worried as long as you keep calling and texting so once you've said your
piece let it go number two no begging and pleading
regardless of how much it hurts you can't beg or plead with a person to talk
to you or to stay with you when you do and when you get rejected you will only
feel more hurt and feel helpless and frustrated and begging and pleading will
make him cringe and feel sorry for you and if he's ignoring you because he
can't handle confrontation he will definitely continue to ignore you if you
beg and plead with him so don't do it number three no stalking his social
media Facebook Instagram or whatsapp to find out when he was last online and I
know I know most of you have done this but this is really bad for you in so
many ways first it requires you to spend considerable time and energy thinking
about what he's doing you see him online and then it confirmed for you that he's
ignoring you and inevitably when you bring it up to him as proof that he's
ignoring you you're going to look like a stalker trust me just have patience and
keep your head up he will come around and you'll be glad that you didn't give
in to his manipulations number four don't resort to hurtful insults
name-calling or picking a fight of course you're angry but confrontations
or saying something hurtful will be something that you later regret don't do
it again being ignored is very difficult to deal with and it's often a
manipulative tactic used by abusive people and narcissists if it's happening
maybe you're dating a narcissist click here to watch a video and find out or
click here to watch a video that YouTube things that you like I'll see in the
next video