One question I see asked a lot, um, is
"Is non-binary a thing?"
[Xylophone sound effect]
I've been seeing a lot of, like, debates by usually cisgender people
about whether or not non-binary people are real and valid.
And I just have a quest--
Why?
Why are you so interested in something that doesn't affect you?
Why? I just...
First off why are you debating other people's identity instead of, like, I don't know talking to them?
Listening to their perspectives?
Trying to understand where they're coming from?
But instead I keep seeing people who are not non-binary arguing that being non-binary isn't a real thing.
And I'm just like
"Why are you so obsessed with policing other people's gender?"
It doesn't hurt you.
It doesn't affect your everyday life and I trust that people know themselves better than you do.
Why do you care so much about disproving an aspect of someone's identity?
Who fucking cares!
It's none of your business!
And I don't mean to say that you shouldn't care about people's gender
and you shouldn't respect their gender because you absolutely should
and to a lot of people figuring out their gender identity is a really long and difficult process.
So I totally get why gender would be important to people.
This is not completely comparable
but as a bisexual person who spent over ten years trying to figure out my orientation
and put a lot of thought into it
I will get people who watch one of my videos
and literally think about bisexuality for two seconds and they'll be like
"Hmm. I don't think she's really bisexual."
How about don't--
you can't have an opinion on my own sexuality until you've thought about it for as long as I have?
Why don't you talk to me in ten plus years?
Something about the way that non-binary and trans conversations are framed
in certain spheres of YouTube and on Twitter and just general conversations I've seen.
It really reminds me of 2008 when Prop 8 was a thing and it passed.
And conservative commentators on Fox News and the Internet and all over the place
were having these debates about whether or not being gay was a sin.
That was the way that discourse was framed.
There was no room for nuance.
There was no room to talk about the many LGBTQ issues.
It was literally just framed as
"Is being gay a real valid thing or are gay people just choosing to be degenerates?"
Which really sucks when you can't have a conversation about anything
without even, like, people agreeing that the topic you're discussing is real.
So if you're someone who in 2017 is debating about the existence of non-binary people
you definitely remind me of 2008 conservatives who were arguing about whether or not being gay was a sin.
Anyway, I am NOT non-binary and I am in no way an authority
and I hope that I'm not speaking over people and if I am please call me out.
I love a good call out of myself.
And I really do have qualms because I think my voice should not matter in this conversation
because I'm not non-binary but I have a platform and I think it's important to uplift other creators.
'Cause I don't think people are listening to first-hand information enough
and I'm seeing too many people outside of, like, the non-binary community
arguing about their existences and it's like
"How about you just let people live their lives and not argue about their existence?"
but, whatever.
I feel like a lot of these problems arise from people not listening to non-binary people and it's really not that hard.
Just listen and be open-minded and maybe you'll learn something.
So I'm gonna link non-binary and gender non-conforming creators below
and please go check them out if you are confused on the topic or even if you're just vaguely interested in it
because they have really unique perspectives that I don't think get nearly enough attention
at least in a positive way.
I'm gonna shout out Riley J. Dennis who is a non-binary trans woman
and she makes really interesting, thought-provoking content, and she gets way too much shit
but I don't get it because she's so nice and, like, so careful with her words
and you can tell when she does videos that she, like, understands what the response is gonna be
and she makes room for that and she'll say
"Okay, I don't mean this so don't misinterpret what I'm saying."
and then people still misinterpret what she's saying so I...
Yeah I recommend Riley because she does not get enough love.
Ash Hardell, who I believe is questioning, uh, her gender--
in the process of questioning her gender identity but she talks about gender a lot in really interesting ways.
Both on her main channel and on her personal channel.
I really love her personal channel talks
'cause she just sits down and, like, talks to camera for ten minutes with no editing and it's really great.
Sam Dylan Finch, who I used to work with.
He is a non-binary trans man and he has written extensively on gender and being non-binary.
Uh, so I will link to some of his work.
[Jazz music]
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