- Are you getting interviews, but no job offers?
If that's the case, this video is for you.
I'm gonna explain to you the two reasons why this could be,
and what you can do about it.
So stay tuned.
(dreamlike electronic music)
If you are one of the people, who keeps getting interviews,
first of all good job,
because not everybody gets interviews.
That means that your resume's working.
People wanna talk to you.
So first of all, acknowledge that that's a win.
Secondly, if you're not moving past to the job offer stage,
there are two reasons why.
The first reason is, it really had nothing to do with you.
And this is not something that you could've controlled.
And this happens all the time.
Being on the other side of it,
I can tell you, that this happens all the time.
There could be any number of reasons
that there was nothing you coulda done about it,
you might've been the most amazing,
most wonderful person in the entire world,
and you might still never have gotten the job.
So some examples of those reasons might be:
they were restructuring internally,
and they canceled the position, but they didn't tell you.
Or, the hiring manager got sick,
and he wasn't able to interview,
so they put somebody internally, into that position.
They had already pre-decided,
but for some reason,
company policy said they had to post it.
You were interviewing later,
and they kind of already decided on somebody.
They ran outta budget.
Something changed internally.
Or they had a major incident,
something that they had to move their focus from hiring,
to this major incident that required their attention.
It could be something like a lawsuit,
the company could be going through some sort of a lawsuit.
Or, they coulda hired somebody
who is a family member or a friend.
That you didn't know, you were not aware of this.
Any number of things coulda happened,
that had nothing to do with you,
and I want you to first recognize
that that could be a possibility.
And so if you are beating yourself up,
and telling yourself that you coulda done better
or you coulda been better, or you could've answered better.
Maybe that's redundant.
Because maybe that's not even true.
So, a lotta the times, that happens.
So that's the first reason.
Secondly, yes,
there might be something that you can learn here.
There might be something very clear
that you could've done differently.
What if there was really something
that you coulda specifically done?
How can you know what it was,
and how can you do better next time?
First of all, don't beat yourself up.
Because that doesn't serve any purpose.
So, what a lotta people will do.
Is they'll come to me, we're on a coaching call,
they'll be like "Oh, I didn't get it,
"I feel disappointed, I feel rejected,
"I didn't do a very good job of answering their questions,
"I shoulda known this.
"I knew the answer but I didn't say it."
Or maybe there was a test involved, and you're like
"I knew how to do it, but I wasn't able to perform,
"or I wasn't able to do it in front of them."
So, maybe you know, exactly what the problem was,
first of all, that's great, you know.
Right, so now you have that self-awareness,
great self-awareness, and now we can deal with it.
Secondly, don't beat yourself up.
Because, think of this.
When you tell yourself things like,
"I shoulda known better, I should know this.
"How could I have been so," insert choice word.
Stupid, ignorant, whatever.
"How could I have been, and not done it?"
That makes you feel, like crap, right?
I would imagine, it would make me feel like crap.
(giggles)
So, there's no upside in telling yourself that.
And what it is, is it's just punching yourself in the face.
Right, you're just like,
"I'm just punching yourself in the face."
And maybe you're really good
at punching yourself in the face, right?
"I shoulda known this, I shoulda done better,
"I shoulda been better.
"I knew the answer, but I couldn't say it."
Or "Damn it, I knew that, I shoulda thought of that."
No upside.
Because, when you feel bad, you're not motivated,
to go back out there.
And actually go get what you want.
You're motivated, to sit in, and be like,
"Oh, I feel sorry for myself, I suck,
"I shoulda known better, how could I have been so stupid."
Right?
So you know where that pattern leads you.
And it doesn't lead you anywhere good.
So I'm suggesting we're gonna shift that.
Into an evaluation mode,
which is gonna make you feel a lot better.
Okay?
So first of all, we're gonna look at what you did,
without any judgment.
So you're not gonna judge yourself,
you're not gonna punch yourself in the face about it,
you're just gonna look at it very objectively,
and be like, asking these three questions, okay?
So first question.
What went well? (electronic chiming)
So, there's obviously things that went well.
Right?
You showed up, first of all,
you got the interview in the first place.
Was it an interview for a good position?
Was it a good opportunity, that you got?
You showed up on time, you found the place,
you were well-presented.
That could be the second thing that went well, right,
so you just wanna grab all the things that you remember
that went well.
It's very important that you do this first,
because your brain is immediately
gonna wanna go to all the things that didn't go well.
But we will get to that.
Secondly, what didn't go well? (electronic chiming)
So were there a few specific questions
that you didn't know the answers to?
Okay, great, write them down.
How are you gonna really dig in, study those,
and be ready for next time?
Right, so that's valuable data, valuable information.
Nothing you need to beat yourself up over.
Not a big deal.
And then, what are you gonna
do differently next time? (electronic chiming)
Okay?
Because, it's one thing, failing an interview,
not getting the job, because of something that you did.
And then it's another thing,
wasting that learning opportunity.
A lotta people will just keep going,
and feel depressed and feel nervous and feel anxious
and just feel bad throughout the entire process,
and just keep going
and going through the motions of doing it,
but feeling bad the whole time.
And that's the whole reason, why they're not succeeding.
'Cause you need to be able to feel good about yourself.
You need to be able to feel good
about the fact that you keep showing up,
even if you're not getting the results yet.
Because your tolerance to failure
is what's gonna get you the result.
So we have two options, right?
The option of, feeling sorry for ourselves, for failing.
So that's thoughts in your head like,
"Oh I shoulda known better, I can't believe I did that,
"it didn't work out.
"Nobody's gonna want me, I'm never gonna get it,
"this is never gonna work."
Right, that's one option.
And that leads you down a path,
which maybe you've been down, I know I have.
And you don't like it, it's not fun.
And then there's the other option.
And it's a choice, very optional choice, to be like "Okay.
"That one didn't work out.
"What's next?
"What went well, what didn't go well?
"What am I gonna do differently next time?
"Where are my next opportunities going to be?"
And when you're focused in that direction,
there is an upside to that.
First of all, it's a very clear upside,
because you're focused on where you wanna go.
And what you focus on, you get more of.
Secondly, you're not quitting.
You're not letting yourself get thrown outta the game,
by one thing that didn't work out.
You have the option to say "Okay, no big deal.
"I failed at that, what's next?"
Yeah, it was a failure, that didn't work, right?
Failure's actually not a bad thing, it's good.
We wanna be failing, right,
because failure leads us to success.
Every great success was built on a pile of failures.
So that's we want you to focus on, okay,
so you're like "Okay.
"I got another failure under my belt,
"what did I learn from that?
"What is next?"
Those are the two paths you can choose to take.
You can choose to feel sorry for yourself.
And that leads to you feeling ashamed and feeling bad.
And from that place,
you're never gonna wanna get up and go back out.
Nobody would.
Or, you can just be like "Okay.
"That didn't work out, what's next?
"Why didn't it work out,
"is there anything I coulda done differently?
"What's next?"
And if you really think that you showed up amazingly well.
You did your best.
You gave them your all.
You showed them how you could serve.
And they didn't want you, that's okay.
Someone else is.
The third thing that I wanted to tell you
was that a lotta people will use that failure.
And make it mean something about their own inherent value.
And that will definitely keep them from succeeding.
It's another choice,
you can make it mean that you suck,
there's something wrong with you.
Or you can just be like,
"Okay, well they didn't understand what I was offering.
"They didn't see the value,
"maybe I didn't explain it properly.
"Maybe I can explain it a bit better next time.
"Next time I'm gonna tell them in a different way
"what it is I'm gonna offer.
"But, it doesn't mean that I'm any less valuable."
So it's like if you went around,
giving out $100 bills to people.
And, say you go up in the street
and you offer somebody a $100 bill.
And they say "No, I don't want that."
Are you gonna think,
"Oh there's something wrong with the $100 bill,
"why don't they want it?"
No, you're gonna be like, "What?
"Are they nuts, did they not understand
"I'm offering them $100 here?
"Alright, well who else wants it?"
I want you to look at that, and be like,
are you making it mean something about your own value?
That you're not getting the job,
or that you're not getting past the first round,
or the second round?
Are you making that mean something about you,
because if you are, then you're probably feeling bad.
And that's probably affecting you getting back out there
and going and doing it again.
So it's called your failure tolerance.
How high is your failure tolerance?
So the most successful people
have the highest failure tolerance.
And that means, that they're willing to get rejected,
they're willing to fail,
until they get the result they want.
And that builds a stronger muscle, it makes you stronger,
and it makes you able to achieve what you want to achieve.
The people who are not successful.
People who give up, and stay in a mediocre position,
or don't move forward,
are the people who fail once or twice, or three times,
or however many times they fail.
And decide that it's not for them, they can't do it,
it's never gonna work.
So the only reason somebody
actually wouldn't be able to achieve what they want,
is if they decide to give up.
And that is completely a choice.
Keep that in mind.
So if you are getting rejected,
for jobs that you really want.
Could be because it had nothing to do with you.
Could be because you have more to learn.
Either way, you're winning or learning.
And as long as you look at it that way,
and you keep going, you will succeed.
Take it from me, I've talked to hundreds of people,
I've been on dozens of interviews,
not all of them go really well.
Some of them do, some of them don't,
but there's always something to learn.
And if I decided that I was going to wallow in self-pity
and tell myself I sucked and I couldn't do it.
Then that would be true.
And I wouldn't be doing anything.
It's okay to fail.
It's okay to get rejected.
Just learn from it, don't waste it, okay?
So what went well, what didn't go well,
and what can you do differently next time?
Then, you say "Next."
So if you'd like some more help from me,
I have a free workshop.
You can sign up below.
The first thing I'm gonna teach you
is how to get infinite opportunities.
So, you might be getting interviews right now.
That's great.
I wanna give you the tool,
to be able to get as many interviews as you need.
So you'll never have to worry
about where your next opportunity's coming from,
and when you have that flow of opportunities coming in,
you're not gonna be afraid to fail at some of them,
because some of them will work out and some of them won't,
and that's okay.
The other thing I'm gonna teach you is,
how to crush your interviews.
All the things that you can control,
I'm gonna show you how to do them on that workshop,
and I'm gonna show you where your focus needs to be,
in order to succeed.
Okay?
Then I'm gonna teach you
how to master your salary negotiation.
So when you do get those interviews
and you're ready to talk about money,
you're gonna be able to feel
comfortable and confident doing that,
which is gonna be so important,
for where you're gonna be five to ten years from now,
and how much money you're actually gonna wanna make, right?
And then fourth,
I'm gonna show you how to set up your promotion,
so that you can get promoted, in the speed that you'd like.
And I'm gonna show you the things that you need to focus on,
in order to make that happen.
So. (electronic pulsing)
If you wanna join me for that training,
click the link below, sign up, it's available immediately.
And I look forward (electronic pulsing)
to seeing you there.
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And if you have a struggle that you'd like me to talk about,
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If you'd like more free resources,
visit me at my website, www.nataliefisher.ca.
And I will see you over there.
Awesome.
Thanks so much, have a great day.
Talk to ya later, bye.