Hey, what's up everybody,
this is Stephan Speaks
or Stephan Labossiere
aka Stephan Speaks.
And today I'm coming to you live
and we're going to be talking
about some good stuff,
but before we get to that,
a little bit about myself. Again,
I'm a relationship coach,
I've been doing this for about 11 years.
I provide relationship advice
for men and women. I provide
dating advice for women,
dating advice for men,
and even beyond that.
Helping you with your purpose,
your overall quality of life,
I'm all about helping you
experience healthier relationships
with yourself romantically,
business wise, you name it.
I want to see you
have better in your life.
But today,
we're going to be talking about
the five reasons
why men pull away.
Now, before we get to the first reason,
remember to subscribe,
click the like button,
and also click that
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rather than having to always search for it.
But let's get right to it,
five reasons why men pull away.
Reason number one,
because he can't
easily get what he wants.
So, what do I mean by that?
What I'm saying is that,
in a lot of situations
let's say the man meets you
and his desire is just
to have sex and have fun.
And he starts to realize
you have standards,
you have morals you,
you have guidelines
that don't allow him
to easily achieve his goal.
In that situation,
he has no desire to stick around.
For what? Like,
it seems like it's going to be too much work,
too difficult.
He rather find an easier route.
So, many times that guy
pulling away
it's a blessing.
It's a blessing, it may
feel hurtful at that time,
but don't internalize it.
Because at the end of the day,
he's walking away because
he was never that serious.
And you want to find that out
as early as possible.
The last thing you, that you want
is for him to drag things along
and have you thinking he is going somewhere
when he was never
really serious about you from the beginning.
So, that's number one.
He can't easily get what he wants.
The second reason
why men pull away
or why men pull away
when they start to get close
is because
he has some personal issues
he's going through.
Now, I mention this because
I've seen a lot of situations
where men don't always handle
big events or
difficult situations
that come upon them in their life
and they shut down a lot.
Now, you may say, well, listen, if he's really
serious about the woman, if he loves her,
why shut down?
He should open up to her.
The problem is
he may not be at that place
with you yet that he feels
comfortable opening up
on that level
and showing that level of vulnerability.
Also, a lot of men have not been
shown how to deal with their emotions
in a healthy way.
So, the easiest route or the route that they're
more conditioned to or they're, they're,
they feel more comfortable with
is the shutting down,
walking away, ghosting you,
and you don't know what's going on.
And then the guy will pop up
a week later, two weeks later, a month later,
and was like, yeah, I was going through some things.
I didn't know how to handle it.
Now, I'm in no way saying
you have to accept that behavior.
I do think that
the first time someone does that,
have a discussion,
and lay out, listen, if we're going to
actually try to get to know each other
you can't do that anymore.
You can't just shut down,
I get you're going through something,
but you got to talk to me and let me know what's up.
We have to communicate, we got to be clear,
but I want you to understand
this is what I'm saying to you that yes,
men going through personal issues,
does cause men to
pull away, all right.
Now,
a third reason why men pull away
is that he met someone else.
That's the reality of the situation.
There's a lot of
times where the guy is dating somebody,
he meets someone else
that he may have more interest in
and he moves on to that individual.
And again, I know that's hurtful, that sucks.
But we have to start looking at
people's exits
as an opening to something better.
Whether that's an opportunity
for you to now focus more on yourself,
whether that's an opportunity
for you to now meet
the person who's actually best for you,
that you can connect with.
Whatever it is,
it is an opportunity.
It is not a time to dwell in hurt
and disappointment
and question yourself
because that man
meeting someone else
and choosing someone else
to give his attention to
is not an indictment on
your lack of worth
or your lack of quality.
It may just mean
he connects more with that
girl than he does with you. The same way
you probably connect
better with another guy
than you did with him. You may not
realize that right now,
but you do. So,
embrace the blessing
in disguise that it is
and understand that yes that does happen.
Now, I don't want you
to jump to that conclusion
the minute you stop hearing from a guy.
Oh, he must have met someone else.
There's so many different reasons.
We got a couple more to discuss,
but meeting someone else is
one of the reasons why that happens,
why men pull away
or why men pull away after they get close.
Now, before I get to reason
number four,
let me just let you know real quick,
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So, now, let's get to reason number four.
And this one might hit you a little different.
But the reason,
the number four reason why men pull away
is because
you're better than what he expected.
So, what do I mean by that?
This kind of goes back
to number one,
and or, there's some correlation there.
I've seen a lot of situations where
a man will meet a woman
and he's going into it very casual.
And he's thinking, okay,
I'm going to have my fun,
hang out with her,
it's going to be all good.
And then, the woman ends up
being amazing.
And so, now, you may think
well, if she's amazing
why wouldn't he latch on to that?
Why wouldn't he embrace that?
Well, because he knows he's not ready.
He wasn't coming into it
thinking this was going to be a
serious relationship.
He thought he was going to
casually date you
and then he saw, oh, my goodness.
Like, she's, she's that
other level that I'm looking for.
She's something
that I need to respect.
And believe it or not,
when a man has high respect for you,
he does not want to
put you through the nonsense that he puts
other women through, all right.
And that's not to make anyone feel bad,
who is being put through the nonsense,
but it does happen like that. I’ve seen men
who would say she's too good of a girl, like,
I don't want to mess her up.
I don't want to cause no problems.
I'm going to leave her alone.
And yes, he may try to come back later
and make things happen when he
feels like he's truly ready.
But I've seen men run
from that great woman because
they were not prepared
for her to be that great.
They did not know
this is what it's going to be
waiting for him you know,
when he started to talk to you.
So, understand that yes,
this can cause
men to pull away in that moment,
especially as they get closer to you. So,
you know, that man will
pull away after getting close
because again,
he's feeling way more vulnerable now
because he really likes you,
he's really into you.
And unless he's truly ready
to embark on being in a serious
committed relationship,
it could cause him to pull away.
And it's easier
to pull away
than it is to kind of stay in that
Grey area
of dating you,
but not fully committing to you.
Because then it's like, it's
almost torture at that point.
If he can't be with you the
way that he wants to,
and give you what he
knows you deserve,
then it's easier for him to say, you know what,
I'm just going to walk away
not going to deal with this right now.
And try to make this work later
if that even comes about.
So, the,
I'm sorry, excuse me.
The last reason,
I apologize. So,
the last reason that
men walk away
and to be honest with you, this
might be the most...
I don't know if it's the most
common reason, but it's
more common than
women realize and
it's a real issue
that is getting overlooked
and the vast majority of people
do not tell women
this one main point.
And before I tell you
this one main point,
again, I just want to remind you
special coaching program
How To Manifest The Man God Has
For You click the link
in the description or the
comment section.
It's going to change your life,
I already have
a lot of people who joined in,
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extremely helpful.
But with that said,
let's get to the last
big reason why
men pull away
after getting close.
And that's because
you're not reciprocating.
So, what do I mean?
I mean that a lot of women
go into dating situations
with walls up.
And going into this,
going into it with this mentality of
he has to prove himself to me,
he has to show me
he's worthy
of me
opening up to him.
And I understand that approach.
I understand that you've
been burned before,
and that you want to
make sure it's safe
before you get to that level.
But what happens a lot of times is,
if you haven't truly healed,
then it's, it's very
difficult for him to
really get you to a place
where you feel like you
can let that wall down.
So, now, you continue to hold back.
He continues to pour in,
pour in, pour in,
and it gets to a point where he gets tired,
and he's done. And he figures
either you're not interested, as
interested in him as he is in you,
you're not serious. Whatever it is,
he can't deal with it no more.
So, to put it in even
more proper perspective,
have you ever had an experience where
for the first month or two months
the man is going hard,
he's doing everything right,
he is Mr. Perfect.
And then, out of nowhere it just stops,
it's just done.
Ask yourself,
in that time
was I really
giving to him as much
as he was giving to me?
If you weren't,
that can be a huge reason why.
Again, understand that
I know a lot of women don't realize that
men are getting played out here
and men have been hurt.
So, I need to remind you
that is the case
a lot of men
have given, given, given,
and ended up
getting played, taken advantage of, and hurt.
So, if he sees that he's giving to you
and you're not giving back.
And when I say giving back, I'm not
talking about sleeping with him.
I'm not talking about
acting like his girlfriend,
but showing
genuine desire
the way that he needs to see your desire,
genuine interest,
willing to put forth a mutual effort
in building that relationship
then yeah,
he'll walk away. And, and
back to like, I think it was
number three on the list.
Where he meets someone else
and she shows a little bit more interest,
she shows a little bit more effort.
He goes to that easily.
So, be mindful and be
honest with yourself about
am I making a mutual effort?
Because it's not about
him chasing you or you chasing him.
It's about two people
putting a mutual effort in
to build a great relationship.
So, that's the five
reasons why men pull away.
Again, be sure to subscribe, like,
and then you know what,
if I missed anything
because I'm sure there's other
reasons we can talk about.
Tell me what you think below
comment below on
a reason that you've seen men
pull away.
And also, always feel free to give me suggestions
on what you want me to talk about.
But I hope you enjoyed the video tonight
and don't forget, sign up to my
special coaching program,
taking advantage of the
special offer while it's here,
get your free
journal, your free
courses of free
How To Manifest The Man God Has For You course
in the program.
There's other benefits,
is going to be worth it
and change your life. So, again,
thank you for joining me on this
rare live
and I'll see you in the next video.