- So, it would appear that I am a hopeless romantic.
Cringe worthy, right?
And you would think maybe,
oh, being a hopeless romantic, that's a great thing.
It's like, you like flowers.
No, that's not really what being a hopeless romantic is.
If I can boil it down, being a hopeless romantic
is wanting to make your life as difficult as possible
if it would make a good story.
And this making things as difficult as possible
just to make a good story,
yeah, the most obvious way is in romantic relationships,
but it can be anything in life, where it's just like,
man, wouldn't this make for a good story
if this highly improbable,
but really exciting thing happened?
Of course, as I intimated,
romantic relationships is where being a hopeless romantic
will really start to destroy your life,
and make you not happy.
And I started to think about this because of something
that happened to me last week, just last week, so long ago.
It feels like it was just last week,
because it was last week.
I hope that this story is not totally vapid and pathetic,
but you gotta be yourself.
I was at the airport, l'aeroport, if you will,
for our French word of the day.
I was coming back home from Minneapolis,
so I was at MSP,
Minneapolis Saint Paul International Airport,
it's a big airport, if you didn't know,
and I was going through the security checkout line.
I got through the checkout line without much incident
except for they had to pat down my butt
to make sure I didn't have any like,
mozzarella sticks or something, some kinda contraband
they were looking for, and then actually,
they also shunted one of my bags off to the side,
because it was so chock full of souvenirs
that I was bringing back that they were suspicious.
They were like,
why do you have so much stuff from Minnesota?
It's not that great here.
Why would you want souvenirs?
So, they had to do an extra check.
After the baggage check,
I was waiting at the end of that conveyor belt
where all the bags come careening down,
you know, in the little gray bins,
and I was at the end where the empty bins get stacked
after people take out their various and sundry items.
I was still waiting for a bag to come,
and so, as I was waiting,
I was just stacking the empty stuff that was there,
'cause I was at the end of the line,
and there was this young woman standing next to me
who was kind of waiting for a bag also,
and putting the empty bins down toward me,
just movin' stuff along.
So, we became like a team without doing it intentionally,
where she would roll me a bin,
I would take it, and I would stack it,
and after a few moments of this,
not long, five seconds, maybe,
we had a moment where we looked at each other
and laughed at the absurdity of what we were doing,
as though we worked there or something,
like it was our job to stack these bins.
And there was shall I say, dare I say,
instant mutual attraction between us,
and so I had this thought, I gotta talk more with this girl.
I gotta ask her to have coffee or something,
and she went and sat down nearby, and it was clear to me
that she was waiting for someone else,
because why else would you sit down by yourself,
and do nothing at the security checkpoint?
I had to get my bag that was being searched.
They were lookin' for the contraband,
they were swiping down stuff
with the bomb residue detection swabs.
Eventually, I got my bag, and she was still there.
I went over to the seats where she was,
and I went a few seats down.
Big mistake.
And I was thinking in my head,
so I gotta ask her to get coffee with me or something.
Oh, one of the things she said,
that really sparked this drive within me
was when I joked about I guess we'll just do this all day
with the bin stacking.
She was like,
"Well, I have two hours before my flight,
"so what else am I gonna do?"
That is what you would call an opening.
She's telling me she has nothing to do.
What better to do than to hang out with a stranger
that you've met for five seconds?
All right,
so why don't we stop briefly to support this channel
with a commercial break.
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I appreciate it.
I'm there packing my stuff back in my bag,
I don't know, six feet away from her, thinking to myself,
okay, I'm gonna go ask her let's go get coffee.
But I was waiting, I was biding my time,
because there was this older couple there,
that for some reason I thought might her parents.
And I was like, that would be awkward
if I started to ask her out, and her parents came over.
I should have just done it anyway.
And so, then,
seconds before I was about to turn and say something to her,
she said to me, "Have a good flight!"
And she went off in the opposite direction
to meet up with some friends
who had just gotten through security.
And I was like, oh.
And then I went a little further,
and I was like, maybe I'll just wait for her to pass,
and I'll talk to her again, and she never passed.
I had blown it, I'd missed my chance.
And if you think the story is pathetic enough to stop there,
I actually went around the airport to the different gates
in the hopes that I would find her again,
and the Minneapolis airport is big.
It's not a small airport, so for me to go,
I went like on the opposite side
to all these different gates that I didn't need to go to,
in the hour I had before my flight, and I never found her.
I was scanning the crowds, I could hear the underscore
in the background, (dramatic classical music)
the urgent underscore.
I could see the closeup on my face
as I reacted with disappointment, and bewilderment.
I got to a point where I was like,
I bet she's at gate, I think it was Gate G, the G section,
where all the Gs go, and that was like, way far away.
I think that's like the opposite end
of where I needed to go, and I was like,
I just can't go there or I'll miss my flight.
And I'm not that in love with this girl,
but I'll go everywhere else.
I'll go to F, I won't go to G.
I had even written out a note to her where I was like,
I really enjoyed stacking bins with you, here's my number.
And I was just gonna, if I saw her,
I was just gonna be like, here you go.
See ya.
It's a risky move, you know,
because I feel like there was mutual attraction,
but even so, that could come across as really insane
if there's not enough interest from the other person,
you know what I mean?
So, I knew that it was a risk, but what did I have to lose?
Not much.
As you can see, me being a hopeless romantic
was driving me to the ends of the airport
looking for this girl,
and I think it all comes to this seems highly improbable,
meeting someone at the security checkpoint,
I think this must be the right person for me,
because of how difficult it is,
and how unlikely it is that it will work,
especially after losing her.
I was like, this'll be extra great.
This will make for an extra big league story if I find her,
especially if it's at the last second.
And up to the moment where I was walking into the,
what do they call it?
The little tunnel?
The jet way to go to the plane, to my plane,
I was lookin' out to see if maybe she would come walkin' by,
and I would run outta the line,
and I would give her that note, and run back to the plane.
But it didn't happen, so I lost her for forever.
I just began thinking about like, this is such a long shot.
Even if you found her again,
even if you hadn't lost her to begin with,
and had coffee with her,
it's like, why do you think this would be worth pursuing?
Why would you think it'd be viable?
She lives a thousand miles away from you,
if that's even her home airport.
So, I began to realize
that being a hopeless romantic is somewhat negative,
because you search out these things
just for the thrill of the story that it would tell,
not because it makes sense for your life.
It's like, (chuckling) what would I rather have?
A very exciting story for a romantic relationship,
or just like,
oh, hey, are we compatible?
Let's go on some casual dates, let's get to know each other,
oh, you don't live very far away?
This seems fairly without obstacle.
Great.
I would rather have the more exciting thing
than the easier, and more natural,
and more likely to work out thing.
It's a problem.
I see this as a pattern in my life,
and if you are a hopeless romantic,
you have this pattern as well.
You're not trying to live life
in the way that makes sense.
You're trying first and foremost to live life in a way
that is exciting, and would make a good story later.
And it would have made a good story.
If I came on this channel, and was like,
guys, I'm gettin' married. (smooth music)
I met this girl at the security checkpoint,
and we were stacking bins.
How improbable.
The other thing is I knew what I was doing.
As I was walking around the airport in a frenzy,
I knew that it was illogical, and I knew that I was doing it
just because it seemed like a thrilling thing to do,
not because I thought actually this was my soulmate,
but it's kinda fun.
Like, you do this thing
where you have fun riding the emotions.
You know that this is stupid,
and not the best use of your time.
I could have been having, you know,
some tacos at the airport Chipotle.
Instead, I was runnin' around after someone,
like trying to find a needle in a haystack,
but I knew I was doing that,
because I enjoy the rollercoaster of those emotions,
and because I know in the end,
it doesn't really matter that much,
so why not have some fun along the way?
But even if you realize you're doing it,
there will be a lot of times where you do it,
where you don't realize you're doing it.
You're gonna seek out difficult relationships,
difficult friendships, and so on,
because I don't know if it's something
that's wired in to us,
or if it's a product of being brainwashed
by movies, books, et cetera,
but it's like this idea that if it is right,
it has to be hard.
You know, like if this is a relationship worth having,
it has to be really difficult,
and has to look like it's not gonna work out
until the very end when it gets saved,
because that makes a good story.
So, we see movies, and we read books,
and that's how they work,
because they wouldn't be interesting
if they were normal, healthy relationships
that were fairly simple, and mutually beneficial for people.
That doesn't make for good drama, so we think to ourselves,
if it's gonna be a good relationship,
like I see in the movies,
there's gotta be some difficulty, some high stakes.
At the last second,
it's gotta seem like it's not gonna work out,
and then it works out,
and oh my gosh, isn't that amazing?
They should make a movie about us,
because of how great this was.
What I have started to do,
obviously not in this circumstance,
but you've gotta go against your inclination,
and be like why don't I hold off on these improbable things,
and why don't I try to focus my attention
more on things that are easier, simpler,
more straightforward, things that might actually work out,
things being relationships, mostly, but anything, really,
because being a hopeless romantic
can infect every part of your life.
You get in this autopilot mode where it's like,
when any situation comes up,
you're always gonna go in this particular direction.
So, for hopeless romantics,
whenever a difficult relationship presents itself,
something's that difficult,
yet would be amazing if it worked out,
you're gonna go toward that much more quickly
than you'll go toward something that you know,
is not that exciting, but it would be very good.
It would be a deep, loving relationship
with someone you're very compatible with,
but nope, I don't wanna go to that,
I wanna go to high drama, high romance.
Even now, as I have lost this person forever,
this person who I may not even be able
to pick out of a lineup if saw her again,
because I only was in her presence for maybe two minutes,
I'm hoping she'll see this video,
or her friend will see this video,
and be like, oh my gosh, wasn't that guy you talked about?
And she'll be like, oh my gosh, yes!
And then, we'll be reunited.
That would be an even better story,
'cause it's like all hope is lost,
and then, it would work out in the end.
Wouldn't that make a great story?
It's not gonna happen, but if you see this video,
bin stacking girl, get in touch with me.
Do you see how bad this hopeless romantic thing is?
Do you see how deep it is?
It's hard to shake.
Very difficult.
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