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Do you believe in the idea of soul mates? Do you think that in this world of 7 billion people,
there is someone out there who you’re destined to be with? If it sounds too good to be true,
psychology is here to tell you that it probably is. Years and years of research on healthy,
long-lasting relationships have taught us that soulmates are created, not born. That
kind of love doesn’t just happen overnight - it takes a lot of patience and dedication. Studies
show that a couple’s compatibility is directly related to the quality of their relationship,
so the more compatible you and your partner are, the happier you’re likely to be. If you
think you and your partner don’t have the right compatibility, you risk holding each other back by
staying in an unhappy, unfulfilling relationship with the wrong person. With that said,
here are eight important warning signs that you and your partner may not be right for each other.
ONE. You can’t be honest with them.
Do you feel like you just can’t be honest with your partner sometimes?
About how you’re feeling, what you’re thinking, or what your opinion is?
Maybe it’s that you can’t speak your mind because it might upset them.
Or you’re worried they might not understand or judge you for your thoughts and emotions,
so you hide it from them instead. Keeping secrets and having difficulty communicating
with your partner shows that there is a lack of trust and respect in your relationship.
TWO. You’re constantly on and off again.
Have you and your partner ever broken up, only to get back together some time later?
Do you rarely stay broken up or together for too long before you do it all over again? Being in
such an on-again-off-again relationship can not only be emotionally draining,
but it can also turn toxic. This kind of instability shows that you both lack the maturity
or compatibility to make a relationship work. Though you might think it’s endearing that you
and your partner always find your way back to each other, it could also mean that the
two of you are stuck in a dysfunctional pattern of unhealthy behaviors you just can’t seem to shake.
THREE. You don’t have any shared interests.
A problem can arise if the ONLY thing you and your partner have in common is that you love
each other! You don’t have any mutual hobbies; you don’t have the same taste in anything;
you have opposing views and opinions, and you have wildly different personalities. Even though
opposites do attract sometimes, most of them don’t stay together for very long because psychological
studies have shown us that every couple needs to have at least some shared interests
in order to maintain a strong and well-balanced relationship. If not then you’ll most likely just
end up doing your own thing, arguing with your partner, and eventually drifting further apart.
FOUR. You run in different social circles.
Similar to sharing interests, having mutual friends, and befriending your partner’s loved ones
is also an important part of making a relationship work. If you don’t run in the same social circles,
and neither of you is even willing to try, then it’s most likely not going to last. If you’re
living two separate lives, then your relationship doesn’t get to be a part of each other’s world.
FIVE. You want different things.
Have you ever heard the expression, “I met the right person at the wrong time?” Well,
just like with chemistry and compatibility, timing
is another especially crucial ingredient in any successful romantic relationship.
Because the truth is, no matter how much you love someone or how badly you want to be with them,
it just isn’t going to work if you’re both at different points in your lives and unable to
meet in the middle. Maybe you’re young and still looking for excitement in your life,
while they’re ready to commit and settle down. If you’re in a relationship with
someone who wants different things from you, then the relationship is on borrowed time.
SIX. Your relationship is not a priority.
Maybe you do love your partner and like spending time with them. You find them charming, funny,
and interesting to talk to. You like being their significant other, and the relationship is easy.
But your relationship will eventually be put to the test and you’ll need to prove just how
much your partner means to you. Can you honestly say that you would be willing to drop everything
and come running when they need you? Are you willing to stand by them through times
of struggle and hardship? Or do you only want to be with them when it’s simple,
easy, and convenient for you? If neither of you is willing to make your relationship a priority,
then that’s as clear a sign as any that you two just aren’t right for each other.
SEVEN: You don’t satisfy each other’s needs.
Do you know what your partner’s love language is? Do you know what their attachment and
communication style is? Whether it’s affection, attention, intimacy, space, encouragement,
or praise, you need to be able to give your partner what they need to feel like they’re
being emotionally fulfilled by you and your relationship and also vice versa. Do they want
to spend more time with you but you need a lot of space? Or they want you to be more romantic
but you show them your affection through gestures instead of words? If you and your partner just
can’t agree on how to express your love for one another, then the relationship might not last.
EIGHT: You have a lot of doubts.
Finally, if you’ve had a lot of doubts about your relationship from the very start,
then that’s definitely a bad sign. Though you could always chalk it up to a fear of getting
hurt or anxiety about the future, having a lot of doubts about your significant other could mean
that you subconsciously fear that you are pursuing a romantic relationship with the wrong person.
Do you relate to any of the signs in the video? Have you had any of these same doubts about
your own relationship? While no relationship is perfect, it’s important to realize the difference
between one that’s worth fighting for and one that’s just not right for you. Like and share
this video if it helped you and you think it can help someone else, too! The studies and references
used are listed in the description below. Don’t forget to hit the subscribe button and
notification bell icon for more Psych2Go videos. Thank you for watching! We’ll see you next time!
Video by Psych2go.