this guy needs no introduction he has a
reputation of being the baddest of the
bad the worst of the worst and often in
discourse he's used as the go-to when
you want to hyperbolically call and
question someone's moral integrity there
is no doubt something engaging and
useful
in this man's name and if anything it's
spectacle there's something very
enticing about how
extreme he is and i think that's why
when people go to make villains
this is the inspiration their mind goes
to first a villain is a bad guy and
if you're gonna make a bad guy why
wouldn't you make the worst
bad guy this is the part where i want to
include a mustache joke but then i
realized i'm going up against nearly a
century of comedy
so just pretend i said something funny
here and that's going to make you want
to keep watching
shots fine [ __ ] [ __ ] i should have said
a century of shots fired god damn it i
can't speak much for the real hitler who
is no doubt a bit more interesting but
the way he's presented in pop culture
and the villains who are inspired by him
are sorely lacking they're not
necessarily bad
as i say spectacle but they're always
lacking in depth and even audience hate
and that's the super fascinating part
about it right
how is it that we can take what a lot of
people would agree is the most evil man
in history
accentuate their evilness even more and
yet it's the school teacher who drives
more hate
isn't that [ __ ] incredible so firstly
let's try to understand why umbridge is
more hateable
and then after that i'm gonna try and
give you a mock scene for how you could
evoke the same anger with a character
like voldemort i
i promise um it's not just gonna be
voldemort shooting a dog with a gun or
about a cadaver they're like the same
thing we made a shirt for that by the
way
i don't know if you watched the last
harry potter video there you go link in
the description
okay firstly let's kick the fallacy
killing masses is super impersonal
like we can all agree that hitler was an
objectively bad guy but do we really
hate hitler this video is a goldmine of
out of context quotes
what i mean is that think about someone
you hate in your life
you like tense up you flare up into
rants you imagine [ __ ] talking them
sometimes you get super hot
not like that i'll let the ship is in
but no seriously
do you feel this for hitler cause i
don't i think hitler is a bad person
obviously but i don't
hate him hate him clearly doing shitty
evil things is crucial
in forging hate but investment must be
formed first in the things you do shitty
evil things to
let's go through some escalating
examples firstly diobrano jojo's bizarre
adventure
literally the first scene that the
hero's dog is introduced it gets kicked
by this guy
and i think it comes with a little hate
because it's a dog and i think people
become very quickly invested in dogs but
other than that it's fairly lackluster
and this mostly just introduces him as a
villain
next example is john wick spoilers for
the first 10 minutes of john wick i
guess but
you're probably pretty familiar there's
lots of memes spawned of this and i'm
sure you've seen
about this guy who goes on a murder
spree because a guy killed his dog but
when you watch the movie
it's actually a lot more impactful than
people let on because this dog is a gift
his wife had organized to deliver to him
after she died
what makes it stronger isn't just
because it's a dog but because the
characters and by extension the audience
got to understand just how much this dog
meant to him it's like the only thing he
has to help with him cope with the grief
although it's worth noting while this is
stronger in investment the villain does
actually come off as less dickish than
dio because he kills the dog because
it's making noise
he doesn't actually know the damage he's
doing to john wick therefore making his
intention
less cruel i think this part about
investment is a really cool observation
though because when i think back to when
malfoy calls hermione a mud blood
i don't think i'm angry because i'm
sympathizing with hermione hermione
doesn't really understand or care
i think i'm sympathizing with ron's
anger wait wait am i am i not supposed
to say the m word
oh wait no i'm a muggle it's fine it's
fine
and before jk retcons were on saying mud
blood all right anyway let's dis dogs
completely because we don't need no
crotch no more
next example umbridge order of the
phoenix spoils by the way
his character harry potter in the order
of phoenix he just comes back from his
duel with recently revived voldemort
he's watched a friend get murdered in
front of him
fought for his life and had to bear the
responsibility of telling the world this
is clearly a sensitive issue and
something both the character and the
audience is
invested in what does umbridge do that
makes her hateable
she calls him the worst thing anyone
could call harry right now
a liar and this is accentuated by her
motivations
technically she supposedly doesn't know
that voldemort is back but there are
some lines that call this into question
and besides this umbridge is the very
least blatantly dismissive of harry
she doesn't seem to even consider the
possibility of him telling the truth and
what her actions could be doing to him
the most obvious explanation is that
she doesn't care and there are lines
that express that i mean imagine how
less hateable she would have been if she
was just like
i'm sorry harry but i simply don't have
any evidence to believe you with
i'm sorry but instead she smirks and
demands people put their hand
up to ask questions before ignoring them
and other such like like
authoritarian dickery and the absolute
cream on top
permanent damage this [ __ ] has harry
used a quill which slices the lines he
writes into his hand to form a scar
it's brutally evil to permanently scar
and humiliate someone based on something
that's not even
true and it's all wrapped up in that
beautiful harry potter creativity that i
talked about last time
when you come back to voldemort it's a
lot less personal i think with a lot of
these villains the writer chase is
spectacular
in such a way where these things get so
broad and all-encompassing that you lose
the intimacy that makes
villains really hateable he murdered a
lot of people sure but did he take what
was valued to the protagonist in the
audience
slice it open and rub salt in the wound
unless you count his parents who neither
he nor the audience new and therefore
can't really miss
no i don't think he did and i think the
best example to that is bellatrix who
seems to drive much more hate because
sirius really
did mean something to harry and the
audience so how do we fix this or
how do i fix this i'm just a critic man
but i'm just gonna i'm gonna put my
money where my mouth
is and try and make something you'll
like so here we go in the honor of the
phoenix we find out harry and voldemort
are linked and can share experiences so
firstly let's assume voldemort knows
hermione and knows she's muggle-born
secondly let's deviate from the plot a
little at the end of order of the
phoenix harry chases bellatrix alone
in this version though hermione comes
with when voldemort shows up he quickly
disarms harry and when he does harry
calls for hermione to do something but
nothing happens
voldemort only then turns around sees
and recognizes her
hermione still holding her wand is
frozen as people have talked about uh
hermione can be quite panicky in the
books and despite her knowledge her
theory can break down in practice
seeing the world's most infamous wizard
the one she must have read thousands of
words on the one where even historical
books have to refer to him with an alias
because he's so terrifying
this is the logic i'm using to have her
freeze up at this point voldemort mocked
both harry and hermione when i went to
hogwarts
you actually had to be brave to be a
gryffindor i sympathize with the sorting
hat really i mean where was it supposed
to put you
there's no house for mudbloods he turns
to harry and mocks him
that this was the hermione he heard so
much about tells him that muggle
sympathizers are all the same that they
pretend that these are real witches and
wizards
humor them harry denies this and says
she's the smartest in their year
tries to encourage her to do something
voldemort laughs and what muggle
wouldn't be the smartest
our textbooks must read like fantasy to
them stayed up all night memorizing
our hard work did you turning back to
hermione voldemort tells her that she's
a thief
not a witch just because you stole our
brushes doesn't make you an artist he
takes a step forward raises a wand and
she jumps
mudbloods can memorize all the magic
theory they want
but you'll never steal the spirit to
apply it harry begs for him not to kill
her
voldemort says he won't he's just going
to prove a point instead as voldemort
points his one point blank at hermione's
head
her one still gripped uselessly in her
hand harry asks what are you doing
to which voldemort says taking back
what's ours
and casts obliviate removing the past
five years of wizarding knowledge from
her memories
hermione is now five million times more
terrified than before whimpering and
shivering making herself as small as
possible
does this look like a gryffindor to you
is this what
you were like before you learned you
were a wizard in fact
why don't we make a game of it let's see
if she even picks up our books again
now that she knows what she is although
i suppose you're not going to live that
long to see her fail
are you potter at this point dumbledore
arrives and the plot continues as normal
when i think about what's dearest to
hermione
it's her knowledge she has such pride in
being that
insufferable know-it-all that that the
best way to annihilate her believing
herself as a witch is to take it all
away and start it from square one with
the gnawing question in her mind that
maybe all of her theory is useless maybe
muggle burns do lack something that
wizard blood has
maybe the sorting hat really was just
putting her in a random house
and smart one of the smart house [ __ ]
uh
gryffindor right and there's a couple of
cool advantages to this detour for a
start
i'd like to think it gives voldemort
some well needed depth to his ideology
secondly you can make hermione really
traumatized over this and even have her
doubt herself as it really is weird that
she's put in gryffindor until you bring
in neville to prove that there are pure
blood gryffindors that aren't
immediately brave and secondly when she
finds a way over her trauma
you can give her some really empowering
moments as she loses a crap tower of
sleep in hospital trying to get back
all the knowledge she lost especially
considering all the time turner's
uh beat the clock but hopefully and most
importantly
this little fan fiction has provided a
much more intimate reason
to hate this guy no no not him not him
you know who