As a dancer, everybody thinks that you’re a stripper, 364 days a year.
When done correctly, Halloween is the one day a year, that you can show off your body,
and not be called a stripper, at least not to your face.
But there’s a problem, Halloween is under assault by the Coronavirus.
Threatening your ability to flex on normal people, in real life.
Luckily, there’s something better than real life.
Social media...
All you gotta do is dress up real good, find great lighting, and spend 20 minutes snapping
a pic.
Then post it online for that sweet, sweet validation.
I have hand-picked, and reviewed, a few costume ideas that I know you've already considered...
Because let's face it, originality is not the reason why you got good at dance.
Standing in front of a mirror, and conforming to what everybody else was doing, was how
you got good.
Before we go on though, if you want to watch more dance comedy videos that make you laugh
and be happy, then please subscribe to my channel.
Lets get on with the video!
Every great costume has to fulfill 3 criteria.
Listen closely.
Criteria 1: You look hot in it.
There’s a reason why non dancers think dance is a fine art.
Because you look fine, therefore it’s art.
Your body is a walking propaganda mannequin built to lure people into dance.
You better have washboard abs, and perfectly toned arms, to convert your yoga or pilate
friends, to start doing a real core exercise.
We already know that the people who play pretend athletes, in a beer league every weekend,
are going to jump on that bandwagon.
Criteria 2: You can dance in it.
Anybody can put on a costume.
That takes 0 effort.
But not anybody, can dance in one.
Dancing is what makes you a rhythmically superior human.
If you can’t dance in your costume, then you’re no better than anybody else, wearing
a shirtless, suggestive, and provocative outfit.
Criteria 3: Random thinking poses Doesn’t matter.
Moving on.
Now that I know you won’t embarrass yourself, let's talk about your options.
Luckily, there’s already a group of people, where your one day, is their everyday.
Strippers...
Anything that a stripper would wear, is perfect for you to wear.
You’ve got the same body, and you prefer wearing as little clothes as possible.
And what do strippers dress up as?
Sexy versions of any job costume.
Which is perfect for you, because while COVID may have robbed you of your employment, and
your ability to enjoy dance socially with other people, you can pretend to be employed
this Halloween.
Which brings me to healthcare workers.
Sexy nurses, parademics, and doctors have always been in.
But this year, you can celebrate your frontline healthcare workers, by dressing up as them
and visually reminding people, of who they’re going to call, when their heart rate increases
by the mere sight of you.
While frontline workers are totally in this year, there’s one type of job that you want
to avoid.
Law enforcement…
It’s not a good time to dress up as a cop, anywhere in the world this year.
Instead, dress up like the people who show up with the cops, but bring 10x the heat.
Firefighters...
This is every male dancers #1 choice, and every female's best fantasy.
Be sure to use some baby oil, to sell it just right.
Other than job costumes, you can never go wrong dressing up as famous dancers.
Starting it off strong, you can dress up as the man who popularized moves, out of this
world.
Michael Jackson...
Pop on a thriller outfit, make a terrible moonwalking tik tok video, and you’ll be
sure to make the king of pop, roll in his grave.
Just don’t blackface yourself.
Please don’t.
If you’re looking to be the queen of swing, then you need to go with a woman who had to
dance better than men, and do it all in heels.
Ginger Rogers...
Throw on a flapper dress and some tap dancing shoes, because you’ll repping a time when
television shows were black and white, and devoid of colour.
Which brings us to our last type of costume.
Coronavirus themed outfits.
Dressing up as a coronavirus themed outfit is a catch 22, and a rule 34.
Do I hate you, because you’re belittling a pandemic that has negatively impacted billions
of people?
Or do I celebrate you, because you’re bringing laughter and joy to a topic, that we’re
all struggling through?
I just know I ain’t giving out any advice, on this type of costume.
Regardless if you’re dressed as a sexy lysol can, a sexy face mask, or sexy hand sanitizer
And you're handing out free cleaning products, to those looking to get dirty, this halloween.
Please subscribe to my youtube channel for more dance comedy videos like this, Peace!