♪♪
Narrator: WE'RE ONLY NINE DAYS AWAY FROM SHARK WEEK,
AND THINGS ARE GETTING SERIOUS.
TODAY, COOK YOURSELF SOME SHARK PANCAKES,
AND ARE YOU READY FOR THIS JELLY?
WE'RE BREAKING DOWN THE RULES OF SHARK SEX.
IT'S "THE DAILY BITE".
YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS.
[ VOCALIZES ]
YEAH.
THAT'S RIGHT. IT'S TIME FOR SHARK SEX 101.
YEAH, BABY.
CAPTAIN, DO THE THANG.
I'M THE CAPTAIN, AND THIS IS SHARK SEX 101.
[ CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS ]
♪♪
THE COURTSHIP RITUALS ARE GOING TO VARY FROM SPECIES TO SPECIES,
BUT IT'S GOING TO START LIKE THIS.
THE FEMALE IS GOING TO RELEASE SOME PHEROMONES INTO THE WATER.
AH, EVERY GUY'S A SUCKER FOR A GOOD PERFUME.
AND YOU THOUGHT SHARKS WERE ONLY INTO THE SCENT OF BLOOD.
WRONG AGAIN, MY SEA-CURIOUS FRIENDS.
NOW IT'S TIME FOR THE BIZARRE MATING RITUALS TO BEGIN.
THESE CAN BE ANYTHING FROM BRUTE FORCE
FIGHTING TO UNDERWATER SEMI-RIDICULOUS DANCING.
ONE SUCH SHARK, FOR EXAMPLE -- THE HAMMERHEAD --
FORMS A LARGE SCHOOL WITH THE FEMALES IN THE CENTER
AND THE MALES ON THE OUTSIDE.
NOW THE FEMALES ARE TRYING TO ATTRACT THE MALES
WITH THE LARGER FEMALES BEING THE MOST SOUGHT AFTER.
YEAH, YOU CAN SAY THAT SHARKS LIKE 'EM THICC.
AND, JUST TO BE CLEAR, THAT'S "THICK" WITH TWO C'S.
AT NIGHT, THE PAIRS WILL THEN BRANCH OFF
AND GET THE AFTER PARTY STARTED.
THE SHARKS THAT DON'T SUCCESSFULLY PAIR UP
THE FIRST NIGHT WILL RETURN AGAIN THE FOLLOWING DAY.
IT'S KIND OF LIKE YOU GOING TO YOUR FAVORITE BAR NIGHT
AFTER NIGHT BECAUSE YOU CONTINUALLY STRIKE OUT.
SOMETIMES, DATING IS MORE ABOUT PERSISTENCE THAN IT IS
ABOUT BEING ATTRACTIVE.
THAT'S GOOD NEWS FOR YOU.
FOR OTHER SHARKS -- THE GREAT WHITES, FOR EXAMPLE,
THE KINGS AND QUEENS OF THE [BLEEP] OCEAN --
MATING RITUALS ARE FAR LESS COMPLICATED.
THE MALE BASICALLY SWIMS UP AND BITES THE FEMALE
THAT HE'S INTERESTED IN.
ESSENTIALLY, A SHARK BITE IS LIKE A RIGHT SWIPE.
HE'S MADE HIS MOVE, AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR HER TO MAKE HERS.
YOU CAN THINK OF THIS LIKE A GAME OF SEXUAL CHECKERS
EXCEPT NO ONE'S LEAVING WITHOUT A FEW BUMPS, BITES, AND BRUISES.
I'M THE CAPTAIN, AND THAT CONCLUDES SHARK SEX 101.
I HOPE YOU TOOK NOTES BECAUSE THERE'S GOING TO BE A TEST.
I LOVE EATING, BUT GUESS WHAT I LOVE EVEN MORE?
IF YOU SAID, "EATING RESPONSIBLY", YOU ARE CORRECT.
YOU'RE SUPER-SMART AND SOMEHOW READING MY MIND, SO PLEASE STOP.
WHAT ARE WE COOKING UP TODAY?
SOME SHARK CAKES!
OOH.
♪♪
A TIP I ALWAYS GIVE MY HOUSEGUESTS IS WEAR EAR PLUGS
BECAUSE I [Sing-song voice] SCREAM IN MY SLEEP,
[Normal voice] IF YOU CAN BELIEVE IT.
BUT WE HAVE SOME EVEN BETTER TIPS FOR YOU
RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW.
CHECK IT OUT.
HERE'S A "DAILY BITE" CONSERVATION TIP --
TRY SUSTAINABLE SEAFOOD.
IF IT'S LOCAL, IT'S PROBABLY SUSTAINABLE.
USE MASS TRANSIT WHEREVER POSSIBLE.
IT'S MUCH BETTER FOR THE ENVIRONMENT.
AS THEY SAY IN MERRY OLD LONDONTOWN,
[English accent] "I'M FROM MERRY OLD LONDONTOWN".
SEE YOU TOMORROW. PIP PIP AND ALL THAT.
BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH. [ LAUGHS ]
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