- Each of our 16 contestants
will be separately locked in a room.
Whoever lasts the longest in solitary confinement
wins a prize.
- Wait, that's the game?
This isn't some kind of joke?
All I have to do is exist?
- They will be allowed no electronics or personal items.
- What?
- The only items they will be given are a notepad and a pen.
- This is awesome, now I can write that fantasy novel
that I've wanted to write for years now.
I have no excuse not to!
- Contestants can tap out at any time
by pressing the panic button.
- I press people's buttons all the time
but I can hold off on pressing that one.
- Who will outlast the others and win the prize?
Let's begin.
- I am so sorry everyone but I kind of double booked myself.
I have an Enneagram meetup group
I go to every Friday afternoon so I gotta tap out.
- We locked you in literally 10 seconds ago.
- Oh, did I win?
- No. - Oh.
(suspenseful music)
- I've been unintentionally practicing for this for years.
- This would be a good opportunity for me
to get to know myself a little bit.
(rapidly exhales)
Okay, I'm out!
- What they don't realize
is I've got so many personalities up here,
It'll keep me occupied.
- This competition is like if you
matched up LeBron James
against a bunch of people
who just learned how to dribble a basketball.
I'm about to score touchdowns on all these people.
- Wow, this place really could have used a once over
with a Swiffer before you brought me in here.
I mean, dust on the baseboards?
What is this, amateur hour?
(rapping) ♪ The haters be saying ♪
♪ I'm not gonna last ♪
♪ I put 'em on blast 'cause I didn't ask ♪
(hip hop beat) ♪ They be tripping on my rhymes ♪
♪ while I'm confined ♪
♪ They hidin' behind Venetian blinds reading "The Times" ♪
♪ LeAnn Rimes, drinking fine wines, watching "Signs" ♪
♪ Little girl with the water glasses, killing alien dudes-- ♪
- I can already feel the phone withdrawal symptoms.
I mean, my hands are trembling!
What am I supposed to do if I have to use the bathroom, huh?
Just sit there like an animal?
No way, uh-uh. I am out.
- This place is not homey nor comfortable.
And I'm sorry to say, the lunch you all provided
left a lot to be desired.
So thank you for the opportunity,
but I think it's time for me
to get to the familiar surroundings of my apartment.
- All right, let's start writing that novel.
(contestant imitating beat box)
- [Intercom] You know that's the button to tap out, right?
- Dude, I thought it was a drum pad.
(suspenseful music)
- What, where did he go?
- I busted out, playa.
- How is that even possible?
- I escaped school regularly when I was a kid.
Anyway, I think I deserve a prize for this.
- Okay guys, I am tapping out now.
It doesn't really matter what the prize is,
I think my earning potential is much higher
out in the real world where I can be hustling.
- Solitary confinement is actually very
psychologically damaging so to put all of us through this
for entertainment purposes is problematic.
So for those reasons, I am out.
Plus I really miss my friends.
- Yes, my body might be isolated
but my mind is still full of the thoughts and ideas
and ideologies that other people put there.
And so you can never really confine the mind.
As such, I find the entire premise of this game
absurd and invalid and I refuse to participate
in it any longer.
- Today, I'm joined by analyst Paige Trafficticket
to discuss the mounting tensions in my brain.
- Thank you for having me, Michael.
- Paige, how would you describe the situation as it stands?
- I would say it's deteriorating
about as fast as Will Smith's career.
- That's quite a slap across the face. Pun intended.
- He seems like he's losing it. I think we should step in.
Okay, you're done. - What--
Really?
OK...
- Wow, with all of this time alone with no distractions
I feel like my mind is firing on all cylinders now.
It is like I am ascending to a higher plane of existence.
(buzzer buzzes) - Aw, crap guys.
I was just trying to clean off the button.
There was dust all over it! Come on!
- I've just invented a zero emissions engine
that runs off of dirty diapers.
This invention will easily make me a billionaire.
As such, I no longer need to win this stupid game.
- After 48 hours, we're down to four contestants.
We'll have a winner any moment now.
- I feel like the ideas are really starting to flow now.
I just have to start writing to some of them!
(suspenseful music)
- I wonder if LeBron ever gets really bored being the best.
- I feel like my mind is so powerful right now,
I could control space on time with my brain power!
(buzzer buzzes) I didn't touch it!
- Oh, sorry. It still counts, you're out.
- You guys are just gonna be like, "Oops, you lose, too bad"?
I just did something physically impossible with my mind.
- Yeah, we don't care.
- This is the story of my life.
- Okay, you know what? I got stuff to do back at home.
I mean, this is the longest I've ever gone
without editing Wikipedia!
The only thing I've ever done that was this mind numbing
is go through the public school system.
I may not have won, but I think we all know I would have.
(suspenseful music)
- Congratulations, you are the winner!
- Oh wow. That was fast.
How long was that? Like three hours?
- It's been 50 hours.
- Wow, time really flies
when you're deep inside your own head
planning out the next 30 years.
So what's my prize?
- You've won an all expenses paid trip to Las Vegas
for you and 10 friends.
(dramatic music)
- Oh, what just happened?
Hello? Hello?
Anybody?
Uhh...
Is the game over?
Did I win, am I the winner?
Crap. I didn't even have time to work on my book.
Oh wow.
I've made a lot of 16 personalities
comedy sketches on this channel.
You don't believe me?
Well, why don't you watch some more?
Watch this one here. You'll love it.
Binge the whole playlist right here.
It'll take you several hours.
I appreciate your time commitment.
If you've got an idea for a 16 personalities sketch
let me know in the comments.
See you next week. Until then, stay cool and attractive.