(applause)
- For my next trick,
I need a volunteer.
- Me me, ooh ooh, me!
- You, over there, young child,
please join me on stage.
- (groans) I'm old enough to vote you jerk.
(applause)
- What's up booger butts?
(laughing)
- It's the Amazing Wonderbread.
He's doing some really incredible magic tricks.
- Presto change-o, become a balloon-o.
- Oh (mumbles)
(laughter)
- That's nothing, check out what I can do.
Balloon-o change-o disappear-o.
(screaming)
(laughter)
- That's not a magic trick.
You merely popped a balloon.
- You couldn't do it.
- Okay you know what, yes I could.
So I don't even know why you would say that.
- Not with magic you couldn't.
- It doesn't require magic okay!
- This guy can't even pop a balloon with magic!
Now watch me touch my tongue to my eyeball using magic.
(cheering)
(groaning)
(orchestral music)
- Okay is this your card?
- It is!
(cheering)
- Thank you, thank you.
Now for my final illusion,
please welcome my lovely assistant.
- Hubba hubba.
- I will now cut Miss Celery in half using this knife.
(gasping)
- Hey that's no magic trick.
Apple got cut in half with a knife just last week.
- Yeah, and I'm still waiting for someone
to save me from the squirrels.
(screaming)
- Ah, but what makes mine a magic trick,
is that Miss Celery will walk away from this in one piece.
(cheering)
- But she'd not gonna end up cut in half?
- That's correct, she'll be fine.
- What exactly are you gonna do to her?
- Cut her in half.
I don't know how to be more clear about this.
- But she's not gonna get cut in half.
- Oh my god!
- Does this guy even understand what magic is?
I mean jeez Louise, you have to actually do something.
Am I right?
(laughing)
- That's it, that's it.
You think you're so smart,
why don't you get up here and perform some magic.
- I thought you'd never ask.
(laughing)
Miss Celery could you please take a card?
Now, is your card the two of clubs?
- No.
- Jack of hearts?
- Nope.
- How about the jack of all trades?
- What?
(laughing)
- King of Queens, Ace of Bass, Queen of England.
(laughing)
- Those aren't even real cards!
- Well if they were real
they wouldn't be magic mr wonder pants, duh.
(laughing)
- It's Wonderbread.
- Under bread?
- [Wonderbread] Wonderbread. - Water bread?
- [Wonderbread] Wonderbread. - Ah, water bread.
I'm sorry, I don't know what water bread is.
Sounds refreshing yet high in carbs though.
(laughing)
(growling)
And for my next trick,
you'll see I have turned mr water bread red, ta da!
(cheering)
- Stop it,
this is making a mockery of everything I do on this stage!
Argh!
- Look out Orange, he's got a knife!
(screaming)
(gasping)
(screaming)
- Wait a minute.
(laughing)
Hey, this is fun!
You guys should really take a stab at it.
(laughing)
- Curses, I used the prop knife
instead of a real knife.
- Wait, so that's how you do the trick?
You use a fake knife?
(gasping)
- Of course!
It's not like I actually cut my assistant in half, come on.
- Boo, he lied to us!
(booing)
- You fools, that's what magic is, don't you know?
Oh go back to Criss Angel.
- No, magic is touching your tongue to your eyeballs.
- Come on Miss Celery,
let's get out of this godforsaken kitchen.
- I actually think I'm gonna stay.
I wanna see more of Orange's magic.
I've no idea how he does it.
- Oh come on.
(laughing)
- Now my next trick is something
you're all really gonna love.
Personally I think it's the greatest thing
since sliced bread.
- Yeah right we'll see about that.
- No, sliced bread!
- Huh?
(screaming)
Woah I hope heel be okay.
(laughing)
Now who wants to see some magic?
(cheering)
Abracadabra derp, here comes a loud burp.
(burping)
(cheering)
Hey hey you, hey hey you.
- Huh?
- Hey, hey buddy.
- What?
- Hey buddy, hey!
- What, I responded to you.
- Oh, I thought you were giving me the cold shoulder.
(laughing)
- [Sub Zero] Okay.
(laughing)
- [Orange] Knife.