Was it the last time you were here that you scared me?
I got you!
You know how hard it is try to scare me?
Everyone's tried to scare me throughout the years,
and I just don't scare it easily.
And the last time Steve was here, they got me good.
This is Steve last time.
You can catch our first guest every week
on the hit NBC show, The Office.
Take a look.
To do a presentation to an international client,
and I have always been intrigued by all things international.
I couldn't think of anyone better
to share my 900th show with.
Please welcome--
Ellen DeGeneres!
Oh, my god!
[CHEERING]
[LAUGHS]
Yeah!
[CHEERING]
Got you.
You got me.
So because of that, when Steve got here today,
I was hiding in his dressing room, in the bathroom.
I knew it.
And I got him.
I knew it.
[LAUGHTER]
Ah!
God!
I was prepared for it!
Aw!
I knew it!
I was-- [CLAPS] oh, I was so prepared for that.
Were you?
Oh!
I thought it was going to be too obvious.
I was like-- no.
And this is like, oh, a picture.
And here's the camera.
Oh.
Oh, hey!
Yeah.
[LAUGHTER]
I knew it.
You did?
In my mind, I had sort of planned for it.
I didn't know it was going to happen then,
and I had something that I was going to try.
But I thought it may be in really bad taste.
Try scaring me right now.
This is what I was going to do.
OK.
Rah!
Ah!
Oh, god.
[GROANING] Oh!
Oh, I'm serious!
I'm serious.
And I was going to go-- and I wasn't going to let up.
Oh, no.
No, no.
And I was going to make you cry at the thought
that you'd actually done some damage to me or given me--
What a horrible thing.
Don't ever do that to anyone!
No, you never want to do that.
I used to-- I don't know if I told this story.
I used to hide in the closet when my dad came home
from work, and I'd hide behind the row of coats to scare him.
How old were you?
Oh, I guess was 26.
[LAUGHTER]
Yeah.
I was probably 11.
And I used to hide behind the row of coats.
And he'd come in and he'd open the closet door.
And he pushed aside the coats, and I'd just go, ah!
And years later, he actually did have a heart attack,
not when I did that.
But I thought--
Maybe it accumulated.
--had I been the one to have induced that,
not a good, good thing.
No.
Mm-mm.
So just keep that in mind next time.
No.
How many times--
[LAUGHTER]
I'll never scare anyone again.
I stopped scaring people for a while
and then we got tons of people writing
into the website saying, why did you stop scaring people?
They love watching people get scared.
It's so good.
It's such a-- you know what it is?
When you were crawling here, wasn't that fun to crawl?
It's so much fun.
Because you know what?
It's a person at their very essence.
There's no-- I liken it to when you're vomiting.
There's no pretense about it.
It's exactly who you are in that second.
Yeah.
I lived in a dorm in college, and one guy got the idea,
I'm going to turn off the light in the elevator and crouch down
in the corner.
And so people would get on, and they wouldn't
know where the light was.
And the elevator doors would close
and they'd go up a few flights.
And then all they feel is that.
[LAUGHTER]
And we'd hear shrieks going down the hallway, just
uncontrollable.
That's so fun, though.
It was so much.
Do you like scary movies?
I don't like scary movies so much--
No?
--but I do like seeing people--
I would like to watch people watching a scary movie.
Maybe we'll-- let's make a movie like that.
OK.
Let's make a movie of people watching a scary movie.
OK.
All right.
We'll get Vance to produce it.
[LAUGHTER]
Her brother, Vance, who--
Yeah.
Oh, I was telling you the other day, every time--
Vance and I worked on The Daily Show together
and we worked together at this production company.
Every time Vance calls my house, I pick up the phone.
Hello?
And he always says, Nancy?
Which is my wife's name.
And I'm like, no!
It's me!
I don't-- ah!
But he does it every single time.
He must have done this to me 20 times.
Hello?
Nancy?
No, it's-- ah!
Like, I don't sound like--
[GRUMBLES]
He's hilarious.
Oh, yes
My brother's a funny guy.
He is.
And your kids are four and six.
Is that right?
They are five and eight.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
You know what?
Yeah, they're four and six.
I haven't updated my files.
They're five and eight?
They are five and eight.
I was told they were six and nine on the card.
They're about to be six and nine.
OK.
They are two weeks away from six and nine.
All right.
Let's call them six and nine.
Wow, did we spend a lot of time on that.
[LAUGHTER]
You know what?
They're like that and that, right?
Right.
Really?
I thought he was more like--
Yeah, he's there and she's there, kind of like-- yeah.
So he's taller?
He's shorter.
But yeah, sure he's tall.
[LAUGHTER]
And are they funny?
No.
Yeah, they are.
Johnny-- we were in a store the other day,
and Johnny wanted to buy some silly string.
Johnny's nine?
Johnny--
[LAUGHTER]
Right.
Six.
And he wanted some silly string.
And we were like, no, honey.
We're not going to get silly string today.
Please, please, Daddy!
I need some silly string.
No, hon, we're not going to get silly--
Where is he from?
What country?
[LAUGHTER]
Was he adopted?
We adopted him from Burbank.
[LAUGHTER]
Uh-huh.
Please, Dad, can I have the silly string?
No, no, honey.
And his response was, please, I will only
use it in case of an emergency!
[LAUGHTER]
What?
What possible emergency is he thinking in his mind?
Like, there will be robbers and I'll
get them with silly string.
First you do that, that, and then the silly string.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Ah.
A little seltzer water in the face.
That's hilarious.
And you didn't get it for him, even after that?
No.
And then we yelled at him.
Good.
Well, when you're 15--
all right.
We'll take a break.
That is from The Office.
Very funny show.
My friend, Justin Guarini, loves that show.
That's a very, very popular show.
Everyone enjoys it.
It's a very popular show.
Yeah, yeah.
Everyone loves it.
It's a lovable show.
Your character is so-- like, he's always very uptight, like,
the way he--
what kind of shoes would you--
what does the character-- because I never see his feet.
What kind of shoes does he wear?
He wears loafers.
Really?
Yes.
Or not.
Sometimes he'll wear other types of shoes.
No, loafers is good.
Loafers.
Penny loafers.
[DINGING, CHEERING]
Yeah!
[CHEERING]
Yeah.
[CHEERING]
You're welcome.
See?
How could you forget?
[CHEERING]
All right.
And the more I say it, the more they get.
No, no.
Right?
That's all.
That was-- I actually--
[CHEERING]
They still just get that.
That was fast.
I had no idea you would say loafer or penny
loafer in that amount of time. so we
have extra time, which is good because I
want to congratulate you on 15 years of marriage,
your 15th wedding anniversary.
[CHEERING]
Actually, it's 50, 50 years of marriage.
Oh, I thought it was 15.
No, it's 50.
Wow, y'all--
50 years!
Can you believe it?
No, I can't.
I really can't.
So 50 years.
What is the secret for 50 years of marriage
between you and Nancy?
You know what, Ellen?
It's communication.
It's being able to laugh and cry.
But it's all about just the little things every day,
reminding each other that you care.
I need to write some of that down because that--
Communication.
How do you spell communication?
K--
Yes.
I'm out of ink.
All right.
And it's just mostly just a whole lot of lovemaking.
Really?
Yeah.
[CHEERING]
Yeah.
What is a whole lot to you?
How often?
What would you say is the best formula?
Well, we-- oh, I'm not going to divulge that, but a lot.
Just a lot.
Frankly, whenever you think of it, you just-- you do.
Oh, wow.
You know what?
Her parents are watching this, and I feel really skeevy
right now.
Oh, all right.
Well, that's OK.
They probably know you do it.
They probably do.
All right.
So the modern gift for 15 years is watches.
Do you know that?
No.
It is.
And so I wanted to give you and Nancy a gift right now.
I'm assuming it's 15 and not 50 because it's--
It is 15.
It's watches.
It is 15.
Yes.
So I--
[AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS]
I know it.
This is her watch.
[LAUGHTER]
Oh, l awesome.
That's your watch.
It just snaps right on.
I knew it!
You know what?
I'm going to wear this on the red carpet.
Oh, that's right.
That's right.
[CHEERING]
All right.
We'll be back with more Steve Carell after this.
That was Steve Carell.
That's Despicable Me.
[CHEERING]
You're despicable in this movie.
I'm pretty evil, yeah.
I'm a despicable guy.
And that was you speaking just now?
That was me speaking, yeah.
What is that?
What is that accent?
That's like your son's accent, almost.
It is.
It is, yeah.
It's sort of that Transylvanian Burbank thing.
Uh-huh.
Where did you find that voice?
That was just a voice--
we spent a little while at the beginning of the recording
session just kind of playing around with different accents,
and that's the one everybody seemed to like.
It involves no country.
Let's put it that way.
It's such a random voice.
It is a very--
How do you remember to go back?
Because it takes a few years to do something
like that, doesn't it?
Yeah, that was a couple of-- yeah, a couple of years,
every day for 10 hours.
No.
Wow.
I thought they were easier than that.
It's so hard.
Oh, yeah.
Doing animation, as you know, is very, very--
It's very difficult.
--very difficult. Because you have to actually go
in and speak into a microphone.
Oh, it's exhausting.
Ah!
How do people do it?
I don't know.
But yeah, we all sort of agreed that seemed kind of evil
yet accessible.
Uh-huh.
I don't know.
Accessible evil.
Yeah.
And do you ever-- because I went to go visit you on the lot.
You're shooting this new movie right now,
and you've got The Office.
And you're just--
I mean, do you understand?
Do you sit back and go, my life is just crazy?
You're doing movies and television.
You've got so many good things going on.
It's a little w--
It's strange.
I would have never expected any of this.
And you're always-- I'm always sort
of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I'm always, always waiting for it to just go off the cliff,
and that'll be the end of it.
But that would be fine, because I just
feel like I've been really lucky up until this point.
Well, the thing about Steve is, there are so many people
this business that aren't really what you see.
And Steve is the nicest guy you will ever meet--
That's true.
--ever know.
He is--
[LAUGHTER]
[CHEERING]
Yeah.
What am I leaving out?
Am I--
No, it was-- that's what we talked about.
Yeah.
[LAUGHTER]
Oh, god.
Seriously, I just love this guy.
He's so talented.
And thanks for being here.
Thanks for letting me scare you.
[MUSIC PLAYING]