Hi friend,
you might already know that
my life has changed quite drastically recently
when I swapped a big city
for a quiet countryside.
But of course,
this year was a big change for all of us.
You also might've experienced
a lifestyle quite different
to what you're used to
being almost forced to slow down
and stay at home for the most part.
Before I moved out of a big city
and even before the world
forced us to change,
I'd always work from coffee shops
or find someplace elses to go to
where I'd surround myself with a busy
social environment.
I'm an introvert,
but that doesn't mean I don't love
people watching.
I'd go to a cafe,
hide in a corner
and then write, edit, work, observe
from that quiet place
so close to others
yet so far in my mind.
And life was fast,
there was always somewhere to run,
always something to do,
someone to communicate with.
Doesn't this sound like a memory
from a far, far past now?
I am now creating a new reality.
Creating a life which will work
with my current situation.
And I'm not talking about
100% certain, long term solutions here
as what I've learned over this past year
is that there's no long term
solutions to anything.
Nothing lasts forever.
And the life you have right now
might change.
You should be open to this change.
Of course, when I first
came to this conclusion
I got a little bit anxious.
You see, I'm an avid planner
so having to go with the flow
seemed crazy at first.
The first thing that helped me
put my mind in order
when life seemed to be all over the place
is writing.
I don't mean just writing to do lists
or journalling,
but a different kind of writing.
Try to write a letter,
as if you're writing to a friend.
Like I'm writing to you right now.
Imagine a person,
someone who's going to read your thoughts
without judgement,
without giving you an unwanted advice,
or criticize you for it.
There's something magical
in writing a letter.
Humans used to communicate
through letters all the time,
and I think it's a wonderful little habit
to introduce back into your life.
Writing a letter to no one
has the same mental outcome
as talking to a friend or a therapist.
Let paper become your companion,
especially if you either don't have
anyone to talk to right now,
or simply don't want to
share your thoughts.
Very importantly - write by hand.
I always feel like
writing by hand has some healing properties.
Your thoughts almost
become materialised.
It's as if you take them out of your head
and free up that space
which cluttered your mind to this point.
And then, there's nature.
That's the second thing
I want to suggest to you
to quiet your mind.
I used to dislike nature a little bit,
thinking that anything living and I
don't go well together.
Actually, i was quite an outdoorsy kid
but it still didn't help me learn
how to care for plants,
or enjoy the slow living
surrounded by trees, fields and flowers.
But regardless of where you live:
in a big city apartment
or in the middle of nowhere in the countryside,
you can surround yourself with nature.
Start with fresh flowers
or a small plant that's easy to keep.
Freddie here, for example
was my first plant, and he's still with me.
Yes, i named him Freddie like Freddie Mercury
and I love him a lot.
Little by little I accumulated more plants
and miraculously I was able
to keep them alive.
This was my first step towards
love for nature.
When I lived in a big city
surrounded by the concrete jungle
I searched for the little green places
within the city.
I was lucky to live near the river
and a small park with century old trees
for the past three years
and whenever I needed more strength
or calming energy
or a distraction from my anxieties,
I went for a walk by the river
under these trees.
By the time I came back home
my mind felt calmer and replenished.
I started craving nature more and more
and I realised that I can't
live in a concrete jungle anymore.
Now that i live in a countryside
for the nearest future
nature is like part of my being.
Isn't it funny how it all started
with just one little plant?
Perhaps you might also
have a small park and beautiful trees near you,
where you can go for a walk
and breathe some fresh air.
Or if not, consider getting yourself
your own Freddie,
and surround yourself with nature
inside your own apartment.
And then, there's a third little tip for you.
Do mindless tasks
which take your mind off
the things you must do.
We tend to go on autopilot
and rush through our to do list
without catching a breath.
We believe that we always need to be thinking,
doing something to become smarter
or more successful every second.
We read self-help books
and throw away fiction.
We fill up our days to the brim,
happily work into the night.
Yes, sometimes we need to push a bit harder
and do more to reach our goals,
but it's not all there is to life,
and not all there is to our being.
Slowing down is as vital
to your health and success
as checking every task off your list.
Slow your thoughts down.
What helps me to do that
is doing some mindless tasks.
The ones which don't require active thinking.
For example cleaning,
or cooking, or walking in the garden.
I decluttered my space very drastically
and got rid of old things I haven't used
for more than a year.
That's my rule -
if I haven't used something for a year,
or haven't even thought about using it once,
then it doesn't belong in my space.
I've also thrown away all of my old journals
which I've kept for many years.
Why, you may ask?
Because those journals are full of
anxious thoughts.
Which is what I'm trying to get rid of
to slow down my mind.
I found that there was no re-read value in them,
as they're full of anxieties
I still experience from time to time
so I need to get rid of them both
physically and symbolically.
And sometimes I simply bake cookies
or make coffee.
These are wonderful things that
don't take much time
but whenever you're busy doing them
they allow you to focus solely on the process.
And that's what we want on the quest
to quiet our mind.
Naturally I'm not a very slow person.
Actually, I'm too fast
and too active at times.
Even reactive, more so.
But we have to learn to follow our own timeline,
our own pace.
Life is generally pretty fast,
and we feel like we always need to
be faster and do more.
But actually, we all have our own pace
and timeline for our lives.
We don't all have the same path
and we don't have to chase each other so much
and so often.
Take time in a day to focus on yourself.
Remember your own goals,
what makes you happy.
Do something that's going to bring you closer
to the life you want to live,
not the life you're conditioned
to believe you should live.
We put more pressure on ourselves
than anybody else.
Be kind to yourself.
Notice moments when you're experiencing
negative thoughts,
when you spiral down into guilt
or self-depricating behaviour.
As someone who battles
with the feeling of guilt every day
this slowing down practice
has really become something so important to me.
Slowing down, and taking care of
our mental health is something we
have to remind ourselves of.
It's easy to forget
when you're busy with your daily life,
but when we remind ourselves of
our inner peace,
when we take time to work on it,
when we practice positive habits daily,
it's going to become a second nature to you,
the more you repeat it.
So, tell me, how do you quiet
your busy mind?
Speak soon.