>> Stephen: HEY!
WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY!
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST GUEST IS A GRAMMY-AWARD
WINNING BANJO PLAYER.
HE'S ALSO DONE A BIT OF COMEDY WORK.
PLEASE WELCOME STEVE MARTIN!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )
>> THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
THANK YOU!
YEAH!
>> Stephen: THANK YOU FOR THAT.
>> THAT'S WHAT I WAS DOING.
>> Stephen: I KNOW.
NOTHING LIKE A BUTT SHINE.
NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
>> THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
>> Stephen: I'VE NOT SEEN YOU SINCE YOU CAME ON HERE WITH EDIE
BRICKELL TO PERFORM LAST NIGHT.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
>> Stephen: WHAT?
THAT IS EXACTLY TRUE.
GOOD THE WAY YOU FIGURED THAT OUT.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: SO WHAT HAVE YOU
BEEN UP TO?
>> ABOUT 190.
>> Stephen: OKAY, GOOD.
( LAUGHTER ) >> YEAH, BUT I HAVE BEEN DOING
SO MUCH.
I HAVE A NEW ALBUM.
I DON'T WANT TO MAKE THIS A PROMOTIONAL --
( LAUGHTER ) I HATE THAT.
YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU'VE GOT A NEW ALBUM, OH --
>> Stephen: STEVE -- YOU KNOW, I TELL YOU
SOMETHING, THANK YOU FOR SHOWING THIS, THIS IS MY NEW ALBUM.
I'M WITH "THE STEEP CANYON RANGERS," A BAND I'VE WORKED
WITH FOR ALMOST TEN YEARS.
WE'VE KIND OF GROWN TOGETHER MUSICALLY.
THIS IS OUR SECOND ALBUM TOGETHER AND THAT'S WHY I WANTED
TO FEATURE THEM ON THE COVER AN SHOW THEM AND THEN, YOU KNOW,
HAVE A -- >> Stephen: THAT'S AWFULLY
NICE.
>> AND HAVE A LITTLE PICTURE OF MYSELF.
>> Stephen: THAT'S VERY GENEROUS.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: WAS THIS THE ONLY ALBUM COVER YOU GUYS WORKED ON?
>> NO, BUT FIRST OF ALL YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND, THIS IS THE C.D.
THE VINYL IS UNBELIEVABLE.
>> Stephen: OH, WOW.
THE FIDELITY MUST BE AMAZING HOW MUCH INFORMATION YOU CAN GET IN
THERE.
>> WHERE ARE YOU GOING WITH THAT?
SEE, THE TITLE OF THE ALBUM IS THE LONG-AWAITED ALBUM.
>> Stephen: IT WASN'T THE ONLY TITLE YOU GUYS CAME UP WITH.
>> NO, WE HAD OTHER TITLES AND WE MOCKED UP ALBUM COVERS TO SEE
IF THE TITLE WOULD WORK.
I BROUGHT JUST A FEW TO SHOW YOU.
>> Stephen: THERE'S ANOTHER CHOICE.
>> YEAH.
YOUR DREAM COME TRUE.
>> Stephen: YOUR DREAM COME TRUE MORE BANJOS.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Stephen: DO YOU WANT TO READ THE TITLES OR SHOULD I?
>> YOU READ THE TITLES BECAUSE YOU'RE IN COMEDY AND I'M NOW IN
MUSIC.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WE'LL SEE.
OKAY.
YEAH, HEY, I HAVE AN IDEA.
>> Stephen: WHAT?
YOU READ ONE, I'LL READ ONE.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: ALL RIGHT, I'LL
TRY THIS ONE AGAIN THEN.
>> OKAY.
WELL, THAT'S NOT FAIR TO YOU TO HAVE TO DO THE SAME JOKE TWICE.
>> Stephen: YOUR DREAM COME TRUE -- MORE BANJOS!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> OKAY.
SONGS TO WHITTLE TO.
( APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: LIVE OUTSIDE
CARNEGIE HALL!
THAT'S GOOD ( APPLAUSE )
>> DID GOOD ON THAT.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
AS WHITE AS YOU REMEMBER.
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
( PIANO RIFF ) YOU KNOW HOW YOUR SUIT FITS YOU
WHEN YOU STAND UP?
>> Stephen: YES.
BUT WHEN YOU SIT TOWN, IT NO LONGER FITS YOU.
>> Stephen: YES.
LEEVES ARE SHORT.
>> Stephen: A LITTLE TIGHT IN THE CROTCH.
>> WELL, NO.
>> Stephen: NO?
NOT WITH ME, NO.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: PLENTY OF ROOM.
I KNOW.
>> I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.
>> Stephen: I DO.
ONE OF THE REASONS I HAD YOU ON, NOT TO PUT YOU ON THE SPOT,
YOU'RE ONE OF MY COMEDY HEROS.
>> THANK YOU IS THAT I DON'T THINK I COULD HAVE DONE THAT
CRAZY HIGH-STATUS IDIOT CHARACTER I DID FOR TEN YEARS
WITHOUT HAVING LISTENED TO ALL YOUR COMEDY ALBUMS WHEN I WAS
YOUNGER.
AMAZING.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) AND, YOU KNOW, JERRY SEINFELD'S
GOOD, TOO, BUT HE'S NOT ON TILL TOMORROW.
>> YEAH.
BY THE WAY, JERRY SEINFELD IS ONE OF MY HEROES.
HE'S LIKE A RETROHERO, LIKE A GUY WHO CAME UP BEHIND YOU AND
IS BETTER THAN YOU ARE.
( LAUGHTER ) I'M TALKING BETTER THAN YOU.
( LAUGHTER ) I THINK HE'S FANTASTIC.
I LOVE TO LISTEN TO HIM.
HE ALMOST PUTS ME AT PEACE.
I CAN JUST LISTEN TO HIM TALK.
I LIKE IT.
>> Stephen: YEAH, I FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT JIM GAFFIGAN.
NOT A JOKE, IT'S TRUE.
( LAUGHTER ) >> THAT'S WHY THEY PRE-TAPE
THESE SHOWS SO YOU CAN CUT THAT OUT.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
I DO THIS TO MY PRODUCER, IF I WANT SOMETHING TO NOT BE IN THE
SHOW, I JUST DO THAT.
IF YOU WATCH THE SHOW THAT MEANS THE NEXT THING OR SOMETHING YOU
JUST SAW GOT CUT OUT OF THE SHOW.
ALSO, I WOULD LIKE MY PRODUCER TO CUT OUT I JUST REVEALED THAT.
( LAUGHTER ) YOU ALSO USE THE FANCY WORD
POLYMATH.
YOU'RE A CONNOISSEUR OF ART, A PLAYWRIGHT, HAVE A SHOW ON
BROADWAY IN DECEMBER.
>> CALLED METEOR SHOWER.
I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON IT THE LAST TWO YEARS, THE GLOBE, LONG
WHARF THEATER IN CONNECTICUT.
I GOT A CALL THREE WEEKS AGO FROM THE PRODUCER AND HE SAYS,
STEVE, YOUR SHOW, THE PLAY YOU WROTE IS GOING ON TO BROADWAY
STARRING AMY SCHUMER, KEGEL MICHAEL KEY, LAUREN BINANTE,
DIRECTED BY JERRY SAX, MULTI-TONY AWARD WINNING
DIRECTOR WHO DID HELLO DOLLY WITH BETTE MIDLER ON STAGE NOW
AND IT'S GOING TO BE AT THE BOOTH THEATER, ONE OF THE BEST
COMEDY THEATERS.
I SAID TO HIM, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I AMWAY TOO HIGH TO DEAL WITH THIS RIGHT NOW.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ANYWAY, THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING,
YEAH.
>> Stephen: WOW.
SO WHAT'S IT ABOUT?
IS IT ABOUT A METEOR SHOWER?
>> YES, IT'S ABOUT A COUPLE WHO LIVES IN OHI, CALIFORNIA, SORT
OF DISTANT, INLAND A BIT, AND THEY HOST A METEOR SHOWER WITH
ANOTHER CUP THEY WILL DON'T KNOW THAT WELL.
>> Stephen: A METEOR SHOWER PARTY?
>> YEAH, TWO COUPLES, FOUR PEOPLE AND CHAOS ENSUES.
>> Stephen: WE JUST HAD THE ECLIPSE THIS SUMMER.
DID YOU GO ANYPLACE TO SEE THE ECLIPSE?
>> I AM SO BOARD WITH ECLIPSES.
( LAUGHTER ) I SAW A PARTIAL ECLIPSE IN
NEW YORK CITY MAYBE 15 YEARS AGO.
IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL.
NO JOKE.
YOU KNOW THE THING INSTEAD OF LOOKING UP, YOU LOOK DOWN AND
YOU SEE THE SHADOWS IN THE TREES AND THEY DO SOMETHING SO
STRANGE.
SO ALL THESE PEOPLE IN NEW YORK ON A BEAUTIFUL DAY WERE LOOKING
DOWN.
>> Stephen: THAT'S A METAPHOR FOR --
( LAUGHTER ) UH-HUH.
ARE YOU STILL DOING ON TOUR WITH MARTIN SHORT?
>> YES, THAT'S MY MAIN JOB.
>> Stephen: REALLY?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> I TELL YOU ONE THING I LOVE.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
ABOUT TOURING AROUND WITH MARTY SHORT.
NO POPARAZZI.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: JUST LEFT ALONE.
MY WIFE THOUGHT THAT MARTY AND I WERE TOO CLOSE, BUT WE
RESOLVED THAT BECAUSE WE GOT ONE OF THOSE BEDS WITH THE
ADJUSTABLE SLEEP NUMBERS.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
SO HE'S GOT HIS AND -- >> YEAH.
WE'RE GOOD BUDDIES.
WE HAVE NICKNAMES.
WHAT HAVE YOU GOT?
GOING BACK IN TIME?
>> Stephen: WHAT GOOD BUDDIES YOU ARE.
>> THERE YOU GO.
>> Stephen: THERE YOU GO.
THIS IS THIS SUMMER, YOU AND MARTIN SHORT.
>> WE FORGOT WHERE WE WERE.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: MM-HMM.
SO YOU SAID NICKNAMES FOR EACH OTHER?
>> I CALL HIM BUDDY.
HEY, BUDDY, HAVING A GOOD SHOW TONIGHT, BUDDY.
>> Stephen: WHAT'S HE CALL YOU.
>> SPOTLIGHT CEILING TIME SUCK MOOD KILLER.
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
( PIANO RIFF ) >> Stephen: ALMOST LIKE
KING TUT.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: HOW IS HE AS A KISSER?
DOES HE HAVE SOFT LIPS?
>> WE KID THAT AT THE DIANE KEATON A.F.I. TRIBUTE.
I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT THE PREMISE WAS.
THE PREMISE WAS, HEY, I REALLY LIKE YOU!
>> Stephen: EXACTLY.
( LAUGHTER ) NOW, YOU MET HIM WHEN YOU WERE
DOING "THREE AMIGOS."
>> YES.
>> Stephen: DO YOU DO FILMS ANYMORE?
I MISS STEVE MARTIN ON CAMERA.
>> I'M SO INTERESTED IN WHAT I'M DOING NOW, BESIDES NO OFFERS,
BUT -- ( LAUGHTER )
>> Stephen: REALLY?
IS.
>> NO, I REALLY LIKE TOURING AROUND, BEING LIVE, WHICH IS
STRANGE.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THAT.
>> Stephen: WHY IS IT STRANGE, YOU LIKE A LIVE AUDIENCE, RIGHT?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> ABSOLUTELY, THIS IS GREAT.
I TELL YOU WHAT IT WAS.
JERRY SEINFELD IS THE OPPOSITE.
HE LOVES IT AND THINKS ITS GREAT.
I WAS ALONE OUT WILL AND THINKING AHEAD AND THINKING,
WILL THAT WORK?
ON TO THE NEXT, WHAT IS THE NEXT THING, AND NOW I HAVE A PARTNER,
AND WE JUST LAUGH, WE ENJOY EACH OTHER, WE SMILE, WE'RE HAPPY
OFFSTAGE, ON-STAGE, LET'S GO.
>> Stephen: IF IT DOESN'T WORK, THAT'S HIS FAULT?
>> EXACTLY.
>> Stephen: NOW YOU HAVE THESE PARTNERS.
>> YOU LIKE TO REACH DOWN THERE.
>> Stephen: THAT'S WHERE THINGS ARE.
>> I SEE.
>> Stephen: IF I PUT THEM UP THERE, IT WOULD TAKE FOCUS AWAY
FROM US TALKING.
>> THAT'S SHOW BUSINESS.
>> Stephen: THIS IS WHERE THE MONEY IS.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: THE MONEY IS RIGHT THERE.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO?
PUT TINFOIL ON THIS AND SIT LIKE THIS.
GET A LITTLE EXTRA TRYING TO.
>> Stephen: YOU COULD.
WHAT TO YOU THINK ABOUT WHAT WE'VE DONE WITH THE PLACE.
DO YOU LIKE THE THEORY?
>> I DO.
I THINK THE GRAPHICS -- >> Stephen: THE STAINED GLASS.
YES.
AND CENTRAL PARK.
>> Stephen: FROM THE TOP OF THE HOTEL NEXT DOOR, CHANGES
SEASONALLY.
VIDEOS.
>> WOW, THE THINGS THAT IS CORRECT DO.
>> Stephen: YEP.
( LAUGHTER ) ARE YOU TOURING NOW?
>> ARE WE TONE?
>> Stephen: NO, WE HAVE TIME.
WE'RE NEVER GOING TO BE DONE, STEVE.
>> WE KIND OF TID THIS.
>> Stephen: IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO SAY YOU'RE GOING TO DO A
SONG COMING UP.
>> OH, I AM.
>> Stephen: YOU ARE GOING TO DO A SONG COMING UP?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> YEAH, WITH -- I MUST SAY,
WITH THE GRAMMY AWARD WINNING "THE STEEP CANYON RANGERS," THE
BAND I'VE WORKED WITH ALL THESE YEARS.
>> Stephen: STICK AROUND.
STEVE AND THE BAND, AT THE END OF THE SHOW, WILL DO A CUT FROM
THE LONG-AWAITED ALBUM AVAILABLE NOW, STEVE MARTIN AND "THE STEEP