You know, one of the benefits of being a YouTuber person is
whenever you're having a bad day or you need a bit of a confidence booster,
all you need to do is look through some comments from your viewers.
and it will really put a smile back on your face.
I feel a real strong bond with so many of my viewers
through the wonderful and appreciative comments that I regularly receive
It's a bond that feels almost spiritual in so many ways.
So every morning, just after I've had my coffee,
I love to pop open the comment section and just have a read through
and feel that personal bond, feel that sort of spiritual connection.
Haha, you fat!
Haha, funny guy.
No, I'm not.
A few years in Japan made you so fat.
Ooohh...did it?
Abroad in Japan christ you gain weight you fat bastard.
Chris you are gaining weight again. Control yourself.
I can't control it.
Is it just me or has Chrish gained a lot of weights? lol
I have the Chris Broad body. Not smiley face.
What happened to gym bro? You stopped going?
Fat
Oh my god I genuinely hate everyone and everything that's existed ever
Stupid people! No actually it's quite expensive...
Yeah, take that! Take that, pen!!
Right, now I'm not denying I might have put on a little bit of weight recently
but you and I both know that I can lose weight, I could lose weight just as easily as I'd turn the light switch on and off
Why won't the fucking light come on
Anyway it's not my fault that I've put on weight, it's Japan's fault.
Until last month I was living in a tiny typical Japanese apartment
with a kitchen so small the fucking Smurfs would have had a hard time cooking in it.
Short!
So I had to eat out everyday, I had no choice!
And every time I tried to do exercise, fate stands in the way
I could climb up that staircase
Or I could take the patronizing small escalator!
Yeaaaah!!
It's so difficult to burn calories in Japan!
Even day to day tasks like lifting the toilet seat are taken care of
I could lift the toilet seat up but it is quite difficult!
I know!
I'll press this button!
Yeaaaahhh!!
How? How do Japanese people stay so slim? When they live in a world of automated toilet seats and patronizingly small escalators
Still, I do take putting on weight quite seriously these days especially after my last frustrated experience of putting on weight in Japan two years ago
When my waist line quickly came to define every interaction I had with the people around me
Everyday for about a year
A frustrating experience I wish to talk about
in this video.
But now, more than ever, I feel the pressure from society to not be fat
Especially as a YouTuber where the only thing that seems to matter is the number of people who click the subscribe button
as opposed to having videos that are actually good.
You know I thought I'd be happy by now, having more subscribers than "Simply Red"
But it's still not enough
And how am I gonna get more subscribers if I'm overweight and have a poor quality face?
One idea I had was putting a cat in the videos
You love cats I love cats everybody loves cats, right?
If I'd got a cat I wouldn't even need to get slim people would just enjoy watching these videos
seeing the cat kinda run around in the background
A cat would probably double the subscriber rate almost overnight
But unfortunately like most apartments in Japan I'm not really allowed a cat
So a friend recently bought me this out of pity
Say hello to Mister Snuggles
He may not move as much as a real live cat but once you put this stylish hat on him
that I found at the 100 yen shop yesterday
Look at that!
He practically oozes charisma
And if that doesn't boost the subscriber rate
Nothing will!
Another thing I could do is just lie
and pretend that I'm some kind of healthy aspirational lifestyle vlogger
Everywhere I look on YouTube now most popular vloggers seem to be the ones who are
showcasing some kind of perfect lifestyle
Bragging about all the brilliant organic things they consume
and all the bananas and yoghurt they free fully enjoy
Whilst the rest of us just sit there watching along, stuffing our faces with fried diabetes
So guys, I like to start my day with a coconut mango milk life shake! It's so full of vitamines and minerals
Zinc, Copper, Cyanide...everything is in this!
Aaah it's so....oh fuck me...so delicious!!!
I read online it makes your skin 3 times less flammable so you should definitely get some from my online store
in the description box below
Yeaaah, something tells me I'm not gonna be able to pull that off!
Now in the UK or most western cultures these days
if you've put on weight it's regarded as being worryingly normal
which is hardly surprising given that 60% of the British population is now classed as either overweight or obese
Compared to Japan where that number is just 4%
And if you noticeably put on weight in the UK or most countries
to point it out to the weight gain would be considered to be a little bit rude or impolite
Unless you're maybe a close friend or relative
Because perhaps there's an underlying problem maybe you're stressed, depressed, or have anxiety issues that need to be addressed
sometimes on a professional level.
And then there's JAPAN!!
Where everyone around you including acquaintances whose names you don't even remember
will prod you day and night in the stomach.
And make remarks about how fat you are.
Everyday for the duration of time that you are overweight.
Back when I was woking as an English teacher about two years ago I started putting on some weight
due to a poor diet and I was going through a bit of a tough time
And all of the sudden my interactions with the people around me...my students, my colleagues, my friends
even people I didn't really know
All these interactions started to change quite quickly
I found these interactions went through 3 stages: the first stage was the look, what I call "the look"
Its not like "the look of love" its more like "the glance of despair"
You'll notice that when you meet people they won't look at you in the face, they'll be looking at your stomach
As if to say "oh my god what the hell is that?"
I can't tell if it's a subconscious thing or it's a deliberate thing but I found it tends to happen
without the person even mentioning your weight or anything so it's very subtle
The second stage is the comment! The indirect comments
Because Japan is a polite indirect culture, people don't really say "you're fat!" they'll kind of make amusing subtle observations about it
Three of my favorite comments were:
"It seems you like food recently!"
And "don't you enjoy doing some exercise?"
And then of course my personal favorite:
"You became a big face!"
And then finally there's the third stage
which is arguably the most frustrating of all which is the prodding!
It'll usually happen after you've talked about your weight with that person at least once.
The next time you'll see them, they'll start prodding you in the stomach
Like you're a big walking fucking marshmallow
And at the height of my fatness it happened from everyone: students, colleagues, friends, people I met on the street once or twice
the guy at the fish market
the woman putting the things through the counter at the supermarket
If you don't enjoy being prodded in the stomach, you're absolutely screwed!
And yet despite all of this, I've never gotten offended or I never found it rude because I know in Japan
health issues are taken very seriously
And this kind of collective action was to try and get me to realize I was being unhealthy
and Japan actually has a fat tax called the metabo law
where people aged between 40 and 74 have to have their waist line measured every year
and if they're considered to be over the limit the company or the local government can get fined
So it is taken very seriously
Then again it's not all bad, if you do put on weight you'll be eligible to join "Chubbiness"
which is an actual pop group consisting of slightly overweight women
Now I did eventually lose the weight that I've put on 2 years ago
but not because I was being prodded or had 2000 people hinting that I was fat
I lost weight for the right reasons
Like a 10.000 yen bet I made with a friend to lose 10kg in 10 weeks
A bet which I lost but nonetheless lost 8kg in the process
and learned how to live a healthy lifestyle which I haven't forgot
But strangely all the prodding and comments actually made me want to stay overweight out of principle
to show that I really didn't care what other people thought
After all, losing weight shouldn't come from social pressure it should come from within
Or in the form of a 10.000 yen bet
So I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna get fit, not because of people prodding me in the street
nor because of viewers on YouTube whingeing that I'm fat
I'm gonna do it
for me!
Because from what I can gather when you're in your twenties or your early 30s
That's supposed to be the fun bit
you know before you have children and mortgages and death
I wanna have fun, I wanna climb mountains, I wanna dive beneath the sea
I wanna cycle around the world
I want twice the amount of subscribers as Simply Red
Then, then it will be enough!
"Chris you're gaining weight again! Control yourself!"