Hi there, how's your day been?
Oh great.
One Coffee please
Oh hey where you from?
Ireland
Would you like me to Irish up your
coffee for you?
Oh, is that when you add whiskey?
No thanks, it's a bit early
Okay
What else do you have?
We've got a Russian coffee?
That's where we add Vodka
Oh, again, I just want a normal coffee
nothing funny.
nothing funny?
No.
ONE GERMAN PLEASE!
Oh no thanks I don't want a
What's the Scottish coffee?
It's quite cheap
The English coffee?
It's quite bitter
We've also got the Swedish coffee
The Flat-Pack White
The New Zealand coffee
Which is an all black coffee
And the French coffee
Which is served in a smug
Don't you mean a mug?
Non.
What's the Spanish coffee
That's a café au lait au lait
We've also got the Qatar coffee
Brand new, extremely hot
and is served in this World Cup
that I bought.
Could I get the Venezuelan coffee?
I'm afraid we can't serve that,
it's just reached boiling point.
Right.
Em, what's the North Korean coffee?
We don't know, but we know
it's nothing like an Americano.
How about I Chinese up your coffee
for you?
Oh what's a Chinese Coffee
Don't ask questions...
Ah...okay.
Could I get an Indian coffee?
Hmm.
That could be arranged
Or...
I could give you this coffee from this country
just south of Saudi Arabia
What's it like?
Oh man.
Just below Saudi Arabia?
Yeah man.
You know what,
screw the coffee,
just gimme a beer
One Irish water!