When people message me on Instagram, about a problem they’re dealing with, it can revolve
around the following: relationship issues, self-esteem struggles, or how to cope with
depression.
Sometimes I will be lucky enough to receive basically an essay, like I’m some therapist.
I’m not sure if I give people that impression with these videos, but to be honest, I’m
just an ordinary person who also goes through hurdles.
So, when people message me about their problems, many times I don’t even know what to say.
All of our problems, including my own, are rooted in fear.
It’s pretty simple when you think about it that way.
As I’ve said in a previous video, fear is a liar.
It stands for F.alse E.vidence A.ppearing R.eal.
It’s our mind predicting and imagining the opposite of the outcome we want.
So, I watched an episode on Regular Show recently, and it was obvious to me that the writers
were inspired to tell this story about the importance of managing stress & anxiety.
In the episode, “Skip’s Stress,” Skip is given too much food on his plate.
While he’s busy doing his own thing, Mordecai and Rigby ask him to help them with something,
so he helps them because he’s a nice guy.
Benson asks him to help him paint a bench.
While he’s busy painting the bench, Pops asks him to help with his gardening, so yeah
you can see where this is going.
Basically, none of his friends have any respect for his busy schedule, and he says yes to
all their requests.
If you’ve watched the movie Yes Man, you would know that the inability to say no every
once and a while can get you into serious trouble.
The group takes a trip to a pharmacy to test their stress levels.
When Skips gets his test done his results show he’s in critical condition.
Since he portrays himself to be Mr. Macho Man who can handle anything, his friends are
shocked that anything could stress him out at all.
The doctor tells him that if he doesn’t take care of this stress problem, it won’t
be good for his health.
When Skips goes to bed later in the day, he has a nightmare about the stress consuming him to the point
of no return.
Then later on in the day, his nightmare starts to turn into reality, when that black gunk
covers half of his body.
His friends realize they need to get him healed ASAP.
Stress to this magnitude can be prevented by doing any of the following on a consistent
basis: Connecting with nature, watching a calming show, listening to calming music,
and if all else fails, going to a therapist.
In this episode, that’s what this ancient stress bell symbolizes.
Many times we think that we can defeat stress by continuing to invest in the very thing
that makes us stressed, but as we can tell by Skip's condition, that strategy doesn’t
do us any good.
Something has to be done to calm those anxious thoughts down.
We need to do something, anything that makes us feel good about ourselves, and generates
excitement, which is another word for “positive stress,” the kind of stress that’s actually
good for our mental health like going on a date, working passionately on a creative project,
or moving to a new city.
These are examples of good stress.
Which is what we should be aiming towards.
Life is too precious to be stressed about small things that don’t really matter that
much.
After Skips rings the bell and defeats the stress monster, he receives an apology from
his friends.
I like how they end this episode.
They notice their car has a flat tire, then Skips immediately offers to fix it because
that’s how generous he is, but his friends shake their heads, “no.”
As a way of saying, “Haven’t you learned anything?
You don’t have to do everything on your own, we got this.”
So yeah, this is an insightful, and charming episode all around.
Now, this topic of stress, and anxiety wouldn’t be complete without discussing how intrusive
thoughts play a major role in altering our emotions.
You can be in a good mood, but then all of the sudden your mind could think about something
that has nothing to do with anything.
For example you could be having a great time having lunch with your friend, but then you
get a random thought like, yeah this is nice, but I’m still single, or there’s a possibility
that the pizza I’m eating could be poisonous, or did I accidentally feed my dog chocolate
today when I gave him those donuts?
And these are just dumb examples, but you know what I mean.
Intrusive thoughts can really kill the mood, especially when you feel like you’re starting
to gain momentum.
Steven Universe has an episode titled “Mindful Education.”
It has some good advice for how to deal with intrusive thoughts.
So right off the bat, we can see this character named Connie isn’t feeling the best.
She beat up a kid at school by accident, and can’t stop thinking about it.
So then Garnet gives her a pep talk about how to deal with her intrusive thoughts.
She then sings this wonderful song about how thoughts are just thoughts.
In this music video, one butterfly symbolizes one thought.
You can see Connie hates this butterfly, she wants nothing to do with it clearly.
As a result of trying too hard to push away this butterfly, or thought away, her backpack
explodes, and hundreds of other butterflies swarm around her.
You've probably heard of the saying, “you are not your thoughts” plenty of times.
That’s pretty much where this is going.
A lot of times we take our thoughts too personally.
We think, “Because I have this thought it means I’m a bad person.”
But you gotta stop and think about where that annoying thought came from in the first place.
Maybe it came from watching a dark scene in a movie, or it could have originated from
a song, or it could have come from someone else.
Our thoughts come from the world around us, we didn’t just make them up, so it’s not
our fault.
Once you realize that, then it’s just a matter of acknowledging the thought.
Not dwelling on it, but acknowledging its existence.
And then realizing, as the name of this song points out, it’s literally just a thought.
It has zero meaning.
It’s just words.
It’s just a picture.
Then you can let it go, and focus on something else.
Something more positive.
That’s why they say a good way of getting a catchy song out of your head is to listen
to that song from start to finish, and then the song will go away on its own.
The next day, Connie apologizes to the boy she humiliated, and they end up being friends.
That, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference between thoughts vs reality.
It’s like having a crush on someone, and not making a move because you’re afraid
they're going to reject you and the world is going to explode.
When in reality, your confidence in asking them out should, and will only make you feel
proud about yourself, that you took a risk and were vulnerable, and didn’t just hide
your emotions.
Plus, there’s a possibility that person likes you back.
So take your chances.
Thank you for tuning into my ted talk.
I was inspired to make this video because I know what it’s like to deal with anxious,
intrusive thoughts.
Recently I have realized that my head isn’t the world.
The world is what it is, but it’s not what my head thinks it is.
The world is not fear.
That’s something that I created in my head for my survival.
Watching these episodes reminds me to stop living in my head, and instead, start living
in reality.
After all, it is just a thought.